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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 3h

Abusers don’t always look like monsters. Their kindness is often a calculated part of the abuse cycle.
#coercivecontrol #invisibleabuse

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 13h

In a disturbing case of domestic abuse, 22-year-old Tamour Nawaz has been sentenced to prison for subjecting his own mother to a campaign of coercive control, intimidation, and violence. #CoerciveControl

shadowsofcontrol.com/in-the...

22-Year-Old Jailed for Coercive Control of his own Mother

In a disturbing case of domestic abuse, a 22-year-old Tamour Nawaz has been sentenced to prison for subjecting his mother to coercive control, intimidation, and violence.

shadowsofcontrol.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 20h

Financial abuse is one of the most overlooked forms of coercive control. Mel B’s story shows how even those with fame and fortune can be left trapped and powerless. Read more on my Substack.

#CoerciveControl

shadowsofcontrol.substack.c...

In the News: Mel B Speaks Out - Financial Abuse is Part of a Controller's Arsenal

Control can manifest in numerous ways, but one of the most overlooked forms it takes is financial abuse.

shadowsofcontrol.substack.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 1d

Healing is reclaiming yourself.
It’s picking up hobbies they made you quit.
Wearing clothes they disapproved of.
Chasing dreams you put on hold.
Reconnecting with friends they pushed away.
Finding your voice & refusing to silence it.
Healing is finding you again.

#HealingJourney

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 1d

If you tense up when your partner arrives home, if the mood darkens when you say 'no' to a demand, if you are fearful to express your needs, pay attention! 🚩 #CoerciveControl

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 2d

The damage runs deeper than what's visible. What abuse truly steals is your sense of self.
#DomesticAbuseAwareness

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 4d

Isolation, dependence, and total control—this is how coercive control erodes your identity piece by piece.
#domesticabuseawareness #emotionalabuse

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

Abusers present a fake persona in public—charming, respectable, & well-mannered. This facade wins trust while hiding their abuse. Behind closed doors, they’re controlling, manipulative, & harmful to their partner & family. #DomesticAbuseAwareness

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

Their voice lingers long after they're gone. Healing means learning to hear yourself again.
#HealingJourney

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

Couples therapy can feel like hope when love turns painful, but if there's abuse it deepens the danger. Control is mistaken for conflict, silence mistaken for peace & victims are left carrying the blame. Built on the illusion of equality, therapy collapses when one person holds power over the other.

Why Couples Therapy Is Dangerous When There Is Abuse

When a relationship begins to unravel under the weight of control and emotional harm, couples therapy can appear to be the obvious next step.

shadowsofcontrol.substack.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

After enduring 25 years of emotional abuse and #coercivecontrol that left her feeling hopeless, Donna found the courage to escape her toxic marriage and rebuild her life.

shadowsofcontrol.com/video/...

Donna’s Journey: Reclaiming Life After 25 Years of Coercive Control (Video)

Learn about coercive control, a hidden form of domestic abuse. Shadows of Control shares stories, insights, and resources to recognize control in relationships and understand its impact.

shadowsofcontrol.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

Manipulation includes #gaslighting—twisting reality so you doubt your memory, perceptions, & sanity. They may dismiss your feelings, shift blame, or make you feel like the villain. This obscures their abuse & makes it harder to leave.

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 5d

Survivors of domestic abuse often face systemic failures, with courts, police, and social services frequently perpetuating cycles of harm. #PostSeparationAbuse

shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Institutional Betrayal in the Fight Against Domestic Abuse

Discover the heart-wrenching experiences of survivors of domestic abuse as they navigate an institutional system that too often sides with perpetrators.

shadowsofcontrol.com

Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 6d

It’s easier to blame the victim than admit anyone can be targeted by an abuser.
#stopvictimblaming #domesticabuseawareness

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 6d

Love bombing may feel like true love, but survivors know how it hides manipulation and control. Here they share the red flags of love bombing they wish they’d noticed sooner. #LoveBombing

shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Too Good to Be True: Survivors Accounts of Love Bombing Tactics

Unveiling the truth behind love bombing tactics: survivors share their stories of manipulation and control disguised as love.

shadowsofcontrol.com

Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 7d

Inconsistency is a form of control. It keeps you walking on eggshells, constantly anticipating what will come next.
#EmotionalAbuse #WalkingOnEggshells

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 7d

Non-fatal strangulation is an extremely dangerous abuse tactic with severe risks and a strong link to future violence. #DomesticViolenceAwareness

shadowsofcontrol.com/articl...

Why Non-Fatal Strangulation Is a Critical Warning Sign in Abuse Cases

Non-fatal strangulation is an extremely dangerous abuse tactic with severe risks and a strong link to future violence.

shadowsofcontrol.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 7d

Leaving an abusive marriage takes courage. Words can heal or harm. Choose compassion.

Read more on my Substack.

shadowsofcontrol.substack.c...

10 Things Never To Say To Someone That Has Left an Abusive Marriage

Leaving an abusive marriage is an act requiring enormous courage and strength.

shadowsofcontrol.substack.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 8d

Question: “But they apologized—shouldn’t you give them another chance?”

Answer: Apologies without real change are just another manipulation tactic. Abusers often apologize to keep you in the cycle of hope, but their behavior doesn’t change. True accountability requires action, not just words.

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 8d

Fear is the heartbeat of abuse. It is not just a side effect, but the very mechanism that sustains it. It is the abuser’s strongest weapon, creating an invisible prison built from threats, intimidation, and constant uncertainty. #DomesticAbuse

Walking on Eggshells: How Fear Becomes the Abusers Strongest Weapon

Domestic abuse victims describe life as walking on eggshells - fragile, tense, and one step away from danger.

shadowsofcontrol.substack.com

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 8d

Abusers demand attention when you're busy. Their entitlement means they won’t respect your time & will interrupt, expecting instant focus. If you don’t comply, they may rage, pout, act aggressively, or go silent. It’s a control tactic. 🚩

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 9d

Survivors often escape the abuse only to face disbelief or dismissal in family court. The system needs to catch up.
#coercivecontrol #domesticabuseawareness

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 9d

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. To honour it, I’ve opened the Shadows of Control Supporter subscriptions at 35% off — a quiet, survivor-centered home for reflection, healing, and connection.

Thank you to everyone who supports this work. 💜

shadowsofcontrol.substack.com

#DVAM2025

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 9d

It starts with intensity—grand gestures, constant affection, promises of forever. Then slowly, something shifts. The warmth cools, the rules tighten, and control takes the stage.
#CoerciveControl

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Shadows of Control @shadowsofcontrol.bsky.social · 9d

The invisible cage of #coercivecontrol is built piece by piece:

🔹 Criticism erodes self-esteem
🔹 Financial control limits independence
🔹 Isolation cuts off support
🔹 Gaslighting distorts reality

These tactics trap you. Coercive control is abuse.

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