Razzle Bathbone
@razzlebathbone.bsky.social
Hell God Baby Damn No
i make better music than you expect: soundcloud.com/trapdoorsman
i make better music than you expect: soundcloud.com/trapdoorsman
Many people are asking about MUCK: A Peasant Magazine. The town is abuzz
December 3, 2025 at 2:59 AM
Many people are asking about MUCK: A Peasant Magazine. The town is abuzz
actually maybe it's this
December 2, 2025 at 3:26 PM
actually maybe it's this
Thing about the expanse books is basically every single one has something happen roughly halfway through that’s like “oh, okay, this is the weirdest and worst thing that’s ever happened in the universe” and that’s a formula designed to work on me
December 1, 2025 at 2:58 AM
Thing about the expanse books is basically every single one has something happen roughly halfway through that’s like “oh, okay, this is the weirdest and worst thing that’s ever happened in the universe” and that’s a formula designed to work on me
Sorry i haven’t posted anything in 3 days. I was having too good a time. Expect more frequent posts as life worsens
November 30, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Sorry i haven’t posted anything in 3 days. I was having too good a time. Expect more frequent posts as life worsens
Call me Wallace Shawn the way Im having Dinner with Andre
November 27, 2025 at 4:39 AM
Call me Wallace Shawn the way Im having Dinner with Andre
you've been served
gonna start sending mp3s thru the mail like a court summons so people are obligated to listen
If You Want Me Around
if you want me around
by trapdoorsman
i'd have to take you apart just to learn how you run
can't tell where you are and how quickly you're going
don't want to see you held down at the end of my sword
soundcloud.com
November 26, 2025 at 7:10 PM
you've been served
Picture this: two cats, one named Tony, the other named Control. And you know they're dumb as hell
November 26, 2025 at 2:45 PM
Picture this: two cats, one named Tony, the other named Control. And you know they're dumb as hell
I think I undersold how weird this was. It was a repetitive brute force motion she was doing, driving the bone up the side of the bottle into the underside of the cap. Chips of bone were flying across the table. Felt a little like the fire extinguisher scene from Irreversible.
At my in-laws’ one year I witnessed a sorority girl at my table open a bottle of beer using nothing but a turkey leg bone. It took her 15 minutes and only got scarier the longer it went on. Like after 10 she just stopped talking
November 26, 2025 at 1:19 PM
I think I undersold how weird this was. It was a repetitive brute force motion she was doing, driving the bone up the side of the bottle into the underside of the cap. Chips of bone were flying across the table. Felt a little like the fire extinguisher scene from Irreversible.
My aunt lost track of which solo cup had her drink. Reached down, grabbed the nearest one, took a mighty swig & discovered it was the one my uncle used to collect some of the turkey frying oil.
After she put it back down their dog got hold of it unsupervised and that dude was poopin for like 3 days
After she put it back down their dog got hold of it unsupervised and that dude was poopin for like 3 days
yes, hello, I would like to place an order for everyone’s funniest stories of holiday food-related family grudges / drama / chaotic incidents / lore
I feel like we need this
I feel like we need this
November 25, 2025 at 3:22 AM
My aunt lost track of which solo cup had her drink. Reached down, grabbed the nearest one, took a mighty swig & discovered it was the one my uncle used to collect some of the turkey frying oil.
After she put it back down their dog got hold of it unsupervised and that dude was poopin for like 3 days
After she put it back down their dog got hold of it unsupervised and that dude was poopin for like 3 days
PEASANT: Make the Wheate grow in Wintertyde. Wheate round the Year
PEASANT AI: Wintertyde Wheate? You’ve stumbled upon an age-old problem — but not one you can’t solve!
🌾Making the Wheate Grow in Wintertyde
First, you’ll want to coat your field in salt. This will improve the flavor of your Wheate
PEASANT AI: Wintertyde Wheate? You’ve stumbled upon an age-old problem — but not one you can’t solve!
🌾Making the Wheate Grow in Wintertyde
First, you’ll want to coat your field in salt. This will improve the flavor of your Wheate
November 23, 2025 at 5:13 AM
PEASANT: Make the Wheate grow in Wintertyde. Wheate round the Year
PEASANT AI: Wintertyde Wheate? You’ve stumbled upon an age-old problem — but not one you can’t solve!
🌾Making the Wheate Grow in Wintertyde
First, you’ll want to coat your field in salt. This will improve the flavor of your Wheate
PEASANT AI: Wintertyde Wheate? You’ve stumbled upon an age-old problem — but not one you can’t solve!
🌾Making the Wheate Grow in Wintertyde
First, you’ll want to coat your field in salt. This will improve the flavor of your Wheate
wet_haybale joined PeasantChat.
<puddlesipper> wellcome ye back
<wet_haybale> ta
<puddlesipper> hast tha seen the moon this eve
<wet_haybale> nay be it ftrange ?
<HimWhatEkes> tis red
<wet_haybale> that be new ?
<gleanmachine> Zounds man do ye ever look up?
<wet_haybale> not unlefs it pleafe milord
<puddlesipper> wellcome ye back
<wet_haybale> ta
<puddlesipper> hast tha seen the moon this eve
<wet_haybale> nay be it ftrange ?
<HimWhatEkes> tis red
<wet_haybale> that be new ?
<gleanmachine> Zounds man do ye ever look up?
<wet_haybale> not unlefs it pleafe milord
November 23, 2025 at 5:03 AM
wet_haybale joined PeasantChat.
<puddlesipper> wellcome ye back
<wet_haybale> ta
<puddlesipper> hast tha seen the moon this eve
<wet_haybale> nay be it ftrange ?
<HimWhatEkes> tis red
<wet_haybale> that be new ?
<gleanmachine> Zounds man do ye ever look up?
<wet_haybale> not unlefs it pleafe milord
<puddlesipper> wellcome ye back
<wet_haybale> ta
<puddlesipper> hast tha seen the moon this eve
<wet_haybale> nay be it ftrange ?
<HimWhatEkes> tis red
<wet_haybale> that be new ?
<gleanmachine> Zounds man do ye ever look up?
<wet_haybale> not unlefs it pleafe milord
Whistling is the kind of thing where if you do it and you suck at it you’re annoying, but if you do it and you’re good at it you’re really weird
November 23, 2025 at 12:28 AM
Whistling is the kind of thing where if you do it and you suck at it you’re annoying, but if you do it and you’re good at it you’re really weird
Shoutout to the guy at the karaoke bar i passed by last night around midnight doing What A Wonderful World in his best Louis Armstrong impression
November 22, 2025 at 4:52 PM
Shoutout to the guy at the karaoke bar i passed by last night around midnight doing What A Wonderful World in his best Louis Armstrong impression
FBI AGENT: Computer, tell me about the Sandwich Shop Strangler.
FBI AI: The Sandwich Shop Strangler? Wow, what a great place to start. It’s obvious you’re not just a profiler — you’re a pro.
FBI AGENT: Thank you.
FBI BOSS: I told you to stop thanking it!! It costs $228 every time you thank it!!
FBI AI: The Sandwich Shop Strangler? Wow, what a great place to start. It’s obvious you’re not just a profiler — you’re a pro.
FBI AGENT: Thank you.
FBI BOSS: I told you to stop thanking it!! It costs $228 every time you thank it!!
November 21, 2025 at 3:07 AM
FBI AGENT: Computer, tell me about the Sandwich Shop Strangler.
FBI AI: The Sandwich Shop Strangler? Wow, what a great place to start. It’s obvious you’re not just a profiler — you’re a pro.
FBI AGENT: Thank you.
FBI BOSS: I told you to stop thanking it!! It costs $228 every time you thank it!!
FBI AI: The Sandwich Shop Strangler? Wow, what a great place to start. It’s obvious you’re not just a profiler — you’re a pro.
FBI AGENT: Thank you.
FBI BOSS: I told you to stop thanking it!! It costs $228 every time you thank it!!
Just say “decline.” “Rot,” if you want. “Decay,” “decomp,” “atrophy,” whatever. Anything but the corny 2010 tumblr dogshit that is “enshittification”
November 21, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Just say “decline.” “Rot,” if you want. “Decay,” “decomp,” “atrophy,” whatever. Anything but the corny 2010 tumblr dogshit that is “enshittification”
❗️Bob wa wa wa Bob Wood (National Program Director - Chum Group) has sent you a LinkedIn request
November 19, 2025 at 10:39 PM
❗️Bob wa wa wa Bob Wood (National Program Director - Chum Group) has sent you a LinkedIn request
It’s Plunderphonics Pwednesday
November 19, 2025 at 10:36 PM
It’s Plunderphonics Pwednesday
Queueing up Frontier Psychiatrist at office karaoke night
November 19, 2025 at 10:36 PM
Queueing up Frontier Psychiatrist at office karaoke night
Joanna Newsom is taking forever to put out her next album because of all the samples she has to clear
November 19, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Joanna Newsom is taking forever to put out her next album because of all the samples she has to clear
Reposted by Razzle Bathbone
In college I lived in a dorm with a pathological liar, and it turns out if you hang around one long enough, his repertoire eventually runs out and he has to improvise new material. Like once he pointed at a Christian Children’s Fund ad on TV and said “I’m actually dating that guy’s granddaughter”
November 18, 2025 at 2:28 PM
In college I lived in a dorm with a pathological liar, and it turns out if you hang around one long enough, his repertoire eventually runs out and he has to improvise new material. Like once he pointed at a Christian Children’s Fund ad on TV and said “I’m actually dating that guy’s granddaughter”
Once every couple months I crack my neck in a way I’m pretty sure takes six months off my life
November 18, 2025 at 4:22 AM
Once every couple months I crack my neck in a way I’m pretty sure takes six months off my life
If you feel you must reply to a joke you weren't part of, my advice is: if you wouldn't feel confident enough to say it to a stranger at the next table you've been eavesdropping on, keep it to yourself
November 17, 2025 at 2:18 PM
If you feel you must reply to a joke you weren't part of, my advice is: if you wouldn't feel confident enough to say it to a stranger at the next table you've been eavesdropping on, keep it to yourself
I know basically nothing about weed but I’m pretty sure the first person to sell an edible version of this will make eight million dollars
November 17, 2025 at 3:53 AM
I know basically nothing about weed but I’m pretty sure the first person to sell an edible version of this will make eight million dollars