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Dr. Doug

@raptorbreath.bsky.social

1.3K followers 500 following 3.7K posts

shrek dick expert, forklift certified, trophy husband, renowned lawyer with a focus on witch law inventor of onion air

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · Aug 6

i'm here for a good time, not a bad time

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Reposted by Dr. Doug

Blue Heron Farm @blueheronfarm.bsky.social · 4h

🎃 October 15 🎃
Urban cowboy

Large tortoise wearing jorts and a tiny black cowboy hat

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3h

sometimes it's best to keep it simple

Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3h

ok but can u do this
*wiggles a little bit*

Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 4h

if u need to unhinge ur jaw like a snake in order to accommodate tiddy, u just do it. ur a grown up. enough with the excuses

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 17h

can't wait to sext with walmart chatgpt

NBC News @nbcnews.com · 18h

The nation’s largest retailer announces a new partnership with OpenAI, aimed at helping shoppers make purchases using the tech startup's chatbot app.

Walmart says customers will soon be able to use ChatGPT to shop

The nation's largest retailer announced a partnership with OpenAI that they say will create more personalized shopping experiences.

nbcnews.to

Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 22h

about to help myself right in the hamburger if you know what i mean

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

this is garbage. go away forever

Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

that was photoshopped. i found the original

a sculpture of charles kurk and bigfoot jesus

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

hope you are feeling well and having a good day🙏

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

i understand this is extremely forward of me but hello

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

no loads refused

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

when i get home from work, i get cleaned up and then sit around in my underwear for about 15 minutes. which is pretty much exactly like when superman flies real high to regain his strength in the sunlight

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

my last 3 sandwiches featured muenster cheese

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 1d

🙏

a group of people are sitting in a room and one man is smiling .

ALT: a group of people are sitting in a room and one man is smiling .

media.tenor.com

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 2d

got a bunch of banger drafts in my work email. my coworkers are in for a real treat

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 2d

boner in the usa

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

a blurry picture of a person 's face with a blue light shining on it

ALT: a blurry picture of a person 's face with a blue light shining on it

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

that baby knows how to party

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

pap smear is short for papal smear because the pope is supposed to do it but can't because he's too busy

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

me rn

a man with a beard and a cape is standing in front of a window in a dark room .

ALT: a man with a beard and a cape is standing in front of a window in a dark room .

media.tenor.com

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

gonna watch the john candy documentary thing. i love john candy and have been drinking. any bets on the minute mark where i start crying?

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

against my better judgement, i'm gonna have a roman coke

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

a screenshot from the "i am spartacus" scene in spartacus (1960) with superimposed text reading "i have a ballsack"

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Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

finally finishing scavengers reign

Dr. Doug @raptorbreath.bsky.social · 3d

fuckin on the bus

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