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oulipien.bsky.social
doleful moo of a cow
@oulipien.bsky.social
B810. The Man who Bit Himself on the Ear. A man explains to his doctor that the wound on his ear (or forehead) is where he bit himself. He explains, "I stood on a chair."

Signal: oulipien.12
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
it is similar to the trick conservatives are trying to pull with the birthright citizenship clause. take something whose meaning is absolutely clear from just a plain reading of the text and transmogrify it into something that says its opposite through obfuscation and esoterica
December 9, 2025 at 2:20 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
it is actually kind of bananas how unitary executive theorists have taken a straightforward clause requiring the president to "faithfully execute the laws" and transformed it into a grant for the exercise of limitless unenumerated power.
The Take Care Clause was a byproduct of the lessons learned from the Glorious Revolution that the executive should not be able to dispense with the law promulgated by the legislature. It was not a constitutional provision to empower the executive branch— but to constrain it!
December 9, 2025 at 2:20 PM
big Hand Injury doesn't want you to know this but the best tool to use to remove the core from a quince is the humble grapefruit spoon
December 9, 2025 at 2:38 PM
London Review of Books discriminating against ladyless lords and lordless ladies
December 9, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
the majority didn’t vote for trump, and even if kamala had put up numbers equivalent to biden in 2020 she would’ve…won dearborn and still lost the election

this obsession with attacking arabs in dearborn is really gross
December 9, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
reading this and thinking today for no particular reason about some ancient history (2009):
December 8, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
the true believers around nixon genuinely saw him as some kind of embodiment of the people and thought that congressional attempts to corral his authority were illegitimate on that basis. straight line from them to the executive power fetishists on the supreme court.
it is incredible that legalizing watergate has been the overriding ideological project of the american right for fifty years
December 8, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
I love how the Times keeps going back to the same callous, racist down-home folks to seek their sanction for this administration’s cruelty and incompetence. This week: what do you think of the boat strikes?

I knew I’d seen this Charles Vaughters — Marine vet, college student — before.
December 8, 2025 at 10:43 PM
December 8, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
Interrupting my reactions to Trump v. Slaughter to register an independent source of dread
The Supreme Court just set aside a 2nd Circuit decision upholding New York's requirement that all school students, public and private, obtain certain vaccinations, without any religious exemptions. It orders the 2nd Circuit to reconsider the ruling in light of SCOTUS' LGBTQ school books decision.
December 8, 2025 at 3:31 PM
Shark that looks like it was created on spec for an underwater scene in the 1986 feature film Labyrinth
The Tasselled Wobbegong is a master of disguise that can eat a fish almost as big as itself in one gulp. It's classified as a shark, but when it lays on the sea floor it looks like a harmless rug if you manage to see it. But with powerful jaws and sharp teeth they are no fish to mess with.
December 8, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
So love wobbegongs. Everything is good about the wobbegong. Its name. Its flattened Oscar the Grouch face. Its frondy bits. Its lazy life as a hungry rug. And it’s a shark. Outstanding animal 10/10
The Tasselled Wobbegong is a master of disguise that can eat a fish almost as big as itself in one gulp. It's classified as a shark, but when it lays on the sea floor it looks like a harmless rug if you manage to see it. But with powerful jaws and sharp teeth they are no fish to mess with.
December 8, 2025 at 9:49 AM
ok fine: I haven't seen this movie more than six times (I've seen it twice). But come on
a man and a woman are sitting on a set of stairs and the words slant please are on the bottom
Alt: Hamlet (Asta Nielsen) scooches closer to Horatio, on whom she (that's right) has a crush
media.tenor.com
December 8, 2025 at 1:30 AM
What's that? You'd like to read a little essaylet on interpretation that takes "artworks are puzzles to be solved" as its jumping-off point? great!
December 8, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
the idea that a handful of conservative legal scholars have an understanding that should supersede a settlement affirmed my generations of american is astoundingly arrogant, and the idea that trump — or any president — can unilaterally overturn that settlement is just despotism
December 7, 2025 at 7:18 PM
Tarr Béla's "The Man from London"
What’s your favourite movie that YOU KNOW is fantastic, and you couldn’t care less if movie snobs would say it “isn’t real cinema?”
December 7, 2025 at 8:16 PM
some people play a game they call "rummy" with rules similar to but at the same time rage-inducingly different from the rules of the game I know as "gin rummy" and in my opinion the former game and its players should be abolished from this earth
December 7, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Just a quick lunch you know how it is
December 7, 2025 at 5:42 PM
New gym fear unlocked
December 7, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Say this for Newsom, rarely has someone advertised their character so perfectly merely through their hair
December 7, 2025 at 2:55 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
Birthright citizenship is like one of the only unequivocally modern elements of the American constitutional order and should be protected at, literally, all costs.
December 7, 2025 at 3:04 AM
That's right
December 6, 2025 at 10:47 PM
I attempted to type all of bunting's "villon" into a series of posts (from memory, mind you) and it froze my computer
December 6, 2025 at 10:12 PM
The love of old men is not worth a lot
Desperate and dry even when it is hot
You cannot tell what is enthusiasm
& what involuntary clawing spasm
Which lines of poetry live rent-free in your head?
December 6, 2025 at 9:39 PM
Reposted by doleful moo of a cow
It is funny that Van Hollen is actually in a one on one beef with a senior leader of the Jewish American institutional political community and it receives maybe 1/100th the coverage of Zohran Mamdani not condemning something he *didn't say*.
December 6, 2025 at 3:55 PM