We wish you a Mari Cohn-mas
@maricohn.bsky.social
Your least favorite drag queen’s least favorite drag queen
Writer by day
📍San Francisco 🌁
Argentinean 🇦🇷
Eat the rich 🌹
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
Be gay, do crime
Writer by day
📍San Francisco 🌁
Argentinean 🇦🇷
Eat the rich 🌹
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
Be gay, do crime
Pinned
Things said at my D&D table with no context, a thread:
*bonk* “Why is there a newt in a forcecage!?”
*bonk* “Why is there a newt in a forcecage!?”
Hey @profanity.accountant how much do I fucking curse? Please and thank you!
November 29, 2025 at 5:51 AM
Hey @profanity.accountant how much do I fucking curse? Please and thank you!
Giving Carly Rae Jepsen a sword wasn’t enough. Give her a gun and full immunity for 24 hours.
November 29, 2025 at 12:24 AM
Giving Carly Rae Jepsen a sword wasn’t enough. Give her a gun and full immunity for 24 hours.
Elphaba is a wild magic sorcerer/divination wizard multiclass
Glinda is a college of eloquence bard
Fiyero is a swashbuckler rogue
Madame Morrible is a storm sorcerer
The wizard is college of glamour bard with a two level dip in artificer
Nessa is a terrible sister
Glinda is a college of eloquence bard
Fiyero is a swashbuckler rogue
Madame Morrible is a storm sorcerer
The wizard is college of glamour bard with a two level dip in artificer
Nessa is a terrible sister
November 27, 2025 at 12:50 AM
Elphaba is a wild magic sorcerer/divination wizard multiclass
Glinda is a college of eloquence bard
Fiyero is a swashbuckler rogue
Madame Morrible is a storm sorcerer
The wizard is college of glamour bard with a two level dip in artificer
Nessa is a terrible sister
Glinda is a college of eloquence bard
Fiyero is a swashbuckler rogue
Madame Morrible is a storm sorcerer
The wizard is college of glamour bard with a two level dip in artificer
Nessa is a terrible sister
Remember when they said JFK Jr was going to come back from the dead and be trump’s running mate? Whatever happened to that?
November 26, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Remember when they said JFK Jr was going to come back from the dead and be trump’s running mate? Whatever happened to that?
Ocean’s 9 and all the women rob the British Museum to repatriate stolen artifacts
If you were a despotic president, what movie would you force Hollywood to make? I want to see Quentin's Star Trek movie or maybe Kill Bill Vol 3.
November 26, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Ocean’s 9 and all the women rob the British Museum to repatriate stolen artifacts
Pies, ranked:
1) pecan
2) cherry
3) pumpkin
4) French silk
5) sweet potato
…
847) apple
848) banana cream
1) pecan
2) cherry
3) pumpkin
4) French silk
5) sweet potato
…
847) apple
848) banana cream
November 25, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Pies, ranked:
1) pecan
2) cherry
3) pumpkin
4) French silk
5) sweet potato
…
847) apple
848) banana cream
1) pecan
2) cherry
3) pumpkin
4) French silk
5) sweet potato
…
847) apple
848) banana cream
I’m getting ready to perform in a Clue-themed drag show as Mrs. White and I’m getting a prop ready. There really needs to be a way to google “how to tie a noose” without setting off alarms and directing me to a suicide hotline.
November 25, 2025 at 5:33 PM
I’m getting ready to perform in a Clue-themed drag show as Mrs. White and I’m getting a prop ready. There really needs to be a way to google “how to tie a noose” without setting off alarms and directing me to a suicide hotline.
Years of reports of Gen Z having less sex than their counterparts in other generations had at their age highlights a prevalence of puritanical ideals in the generation. This led directly to a rejection of 69 as the iconically funny number in favor of the objectively dumber 67. In this essay, I will—
November 25, 2025 at 3:45 AM
Years of reports of Gen Z having less sex than their counterparts in other generations had at their age highlights a prevalence of puritanical ideals in the generation. This led directly to a rejection of 69 as the iconically funny number in favor of the objectively dumber 67. In this essay, I will—
I can respect, but disagree with, a moderate. At least they have opinions and a stated direction they’d like policy to go in.
Centrists can fuck all the way off.
Centrists can fuck all the way off.
November 25, 2025 at 3:30 AM
I can respect, but disagree with, a moderate. At least they have opinions and a stated direction they’d like policy to go in.
Centrists can fuck all the way off.
Centrists can fuck all the way off.
Surgically remove the part of my brain that holds information about Olivia Nuzzi
November 25, 2025 at 12:23 AM
Surgically remove the part of my brain that holds information about Olivia Nuzzi
Adam Lashinsky publish an opinion that isn’t terrible challenge level: impossible.
November 24, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Adam Lashinsky publish an opinion that isn’t terrible challenge level: impossible.
Reposted by We wish you a Mari Cohn-mas
If I’m understanding this correctly, X is owned by a white nationalist who pays poor people of color in developing countries to pretend to be working class white Americans to scare other white Americans into being afraid poor people of color from developing countries are going to ruin America?
November 23, 2025 at 7:30 PM
If I’m understanding this correctly, X is owned by a white nationalist who pays poor people of color in developing countries to pretend to be working class white Americans to scare other white Americans into being afraid poor people of color from developing countries are going to ruin America?
Just once I want the opportunity to throw out my arm, point, and yell, “Seize him!”
November 24, 2025 at 6:56 AM
Just once I want the opportunity to throw out my arm, point, and yell, “Seize him!”
I love Michelle Yeoh but she had no business singing. Some other options for Morrible:
-Christine Baranski (can make a great villain turn)
-Lea Salonga (give her a chance to shine on screen!)
-Keala Settle (she was RIGHT THERE!)
-Audra McDonald (duh)
-Carole Kane or Sheryl Lee Ralph (OG Morribles)
-Christine Baranski (can make a great villain turn)
-Lea Salonga (give her a chance to shine on screen!)
-Keala Settle (she was RIGHT THERE!)
-Audra McDonald (duh)
-Carole Kane or Sheryl Lee Ralph (OG Morribles)
November 24, 2025 at 3:36 AM
I love Michelle Yeoh but she had no business singing. Some other options for Morrible:
-Christine Baranski (can make a great villain turn)
-Lea Salonga (give her a chance to shine on screen!)
-Keala Settle (she was RIGHT THERE!)
-Audra McDonald (duh)
-Carole Kane or Sheryl Lee Ralph (OG Morribles)
-Christine Baranski (can make a great villain turn)
-Lea Salonga (give her a chance to shine on screen!)
-Keala Settle (she was RIGHT THERE!)
-Audra McDonald (duh)
-Carole Kane or Sheryl Lee Ralph (OG Morribles)
I hear your voice
It’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes
Oh God I think I'm falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me
It’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes
Oh God I think I'm falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me
November 23, 2025 at 3:33 AM
I hear your voice
It’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes
Oh God I think I'm falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me
It’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes
Oh God I think I'm falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me
If you’re an ICE agent, are you not embarrassed?
November 23, 2025 at 2:12 AM
If you’re an ICE agent, are you not embarrassed?
I wish I could go back to who I was 24 hours ago before I read RFK Jr’s blowjob poem
November 22, 2025 at 11:01 PM
I wish I could go back to who I was 24 hours ago before I read RFK Jr’s blowjob poem
After just three paragraphs, I regret learning how to read.
November 22, 2025 at 6:59 AM
After just three paragraphs, I regret learning how to read.
Without downloading any new pics, describe your gender.
November 20, 2025 at 6:39 AM
Without downloading any new pics, describe your gender.
Reposted by We wish you a Mari Cohn-mas
I love modern criminals, they’re always googling shit like “how to do crime”
"Cellphone records showed that two days before the purported attack, her co-conspirator searched online for 'zip ties near me'"
A staffer to a New Jersey congressman allegedly paid an scarification artist $500 to wound her as she staged a scene with zip ties and “Trump Whore” written on her stomach, federal prosecutors say
November 20, 2025 at 2:43 AM
I love modern criminals, they’re always googling shit like “how to do crime”
I do want to see that Eternity movie, but if it doesn’t end as a throuple situation I will storm the Capitol.
November 19, 2025 at 11:08 PM
I do want to see that Eternity movie, but if it doesn’t end as a throuple situation I will storm the Capitol.
I needed rope for a drag show I’m in soon (doing Mrs. White from Clue) so I texted the group chat. And that’s how I learned how many of my friends are into bondage.
November 19, 2025 at 8:43 PM
I needed rope for a drag show I’m in soon (doing Mrs. White from Clue) so I texted the group chat. And that’s how I learned how many of my friends are into bondage.
Reposted by We wish you a Mari Cohn-mas
Medicare for All would save $450B a year.
Every dollar spent on food stamps generates $1.50-$1.80 in economic activity.
Each dollar going to low-wage workers adds $1.20 to the economy overall.
It’s not about what this country can or can’t afford.
It’s about priorities.
Every dollar spent on food stamps generates $1.50-$1.80 in economic activity.
Each dollar going to low-wage workers adds $1.20 to the economy overall.
It’s not about what this country can or can’t afford.
It’s about priorities.
November 18, 2025 at 10:45 PM
Medicare for All would save $450B a year.
Every dollar spent on food stamps generates $1.50-$1.80 in economic activity.
Each dollar going to low-wage workers adds $1.20 to the economy overall.
It’s not about what this country can or can’t afford.
It’s about priorities.
Every dollar spent on food stamps generates $1.50-$1.80 in economic activity.
Each dollar going to low-wage workers adds $1.20 to the economy overall.
It’s not about what this country can or can’t afford.
It’s about priorities.
Wow, if I had a nickel for every time Olivia Nuzzi had an affair with a presidential candidate more than twice her age while in a relationship with Ryan Lizza, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.
November 18, 2025 at 2:04 AM
Wow, if I had a nickel for every time Olivia Nuzzi had an affair with a presidential candidate more than twice her age while in a relationship with Ryan Lizza, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.
OMFG THAT LAST SENTENCE
November 18, 2025 at 1:58 AM
OMFG THAT LAST SENTENCE