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greenleejw.bsky.social
Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
@greenleejw.bsky.social
28K followers 330 following 7.9K posts
Surprised historian, not surprised eels.

Doctor of medieval things. Talkin’ eels, history, and maps. Spaniel mourner. Alt-text artist.

I draw custom maps and artwork on commission:
https://surprisedeelmaps.com/

Support me here: patreon.com/SurprisedEel
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greenleejw.bsky.social
Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · Nov 17
I draw custom maps on commission. Maps for books, games, decoration, etc. Here are a couple of examples. There are more on my website, along with a contact form and info about cost, process, etc.

If you need a map, I'm happy to help!

surprisedeelmaps.com
A black and white map showing a city plan for ancient Mycenae. A black and white map showing downtown NY, with small drawings of city landmarks in small snowglobes around the outside of the map. Each drawing is labeled with a number, and the map has corresponding numbers to show where the landmarks are located. A colored fantasy-style map of a land labeled "Examploria." A black and white map of medieval Iberia, focused on the Christian kingdoms in the northern part of the peninsula.
greenleejw.bsky.social
One more drawing from this evening. A very fancy bird, perhaps?
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines that might look like a bird with a fancy crest and a long, thick neck
November 28, 2025 at 7:02 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from this evening. A fish, or whale perhaps? I am unsure
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines. It might look like a fish or whale with its tail raised out of the water behind it and its head up out of water as well. It might also look like a crawfish.
November 28, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
It's Thanksgiving! Are you getting your eels ready? It's tradition!

The 1st Thanksgiving included a big table full of eels. And it's fitting. Tisquantum brought eels to the starving pilgrims that spring to celebrate their new treaty w/ the local Wampanoag tribe. 1/5
🗃️🧪
B&W drawing of the 1st Thanksgiving, showing a table full of vegetables and eels. In the center are a pilgrim man, dressed in black and white, with a silly hat and giant collar. He's holding a bowl of grapes, and looking incredibly disengaged. Standing with him is a Native American man, with feathers in his hair. He's not wearing a shirt, but he is wearing several armbands. In all, he looks far more comfortable. He's reaching for a grape, or pointing at one as if to say, "This one has the poison." Behind the Native American are several others, fading into the background. Behind the pilgrim are two figures, presumably his wife and kid, and couple of houses with thatched roofs. The wife, carrying a basket of apples, has an uncertain expression on her face. It's likely that she's checking out the half-dressed man in her yard, and thinking about how her husband doesn't stack up so well. On the table in the foreground, in pride of place, is a plate piled high with eels. NOW it's a feast.
November 27, 2025 at 5:59 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
It's Thanksgiving! Are you getting your eels ready? It's tradition!

The 1st Thanksgiving included a big table full of eels. And it's fitting. Tisquantum brought eels to the starving pilgrims that spring to celebrate their new treaty w/ the local Wampanoag tribe. 1/5
🗃️🧪
B&W drawing of the 1st Thanksgiving, showing a table full of vegetables and eels. In the center are a pilgrim man, dressed in black and white, with a silly hat and giant collar. He's holding a bowl of grapes, and looking incredibly disengaged. Standing with him is a Native American man, with feathers in his hair. He's not wearing a shirt, but he is wearing several armbands. In all, he looks far more comfortable. He's reaching for a grape, or pointing at one as if to say, "This one has the poison." Behind the Native American are several others, fading into the background. Behind the pilgrim are two figures, presumably his wife and kid, and couple of houses with thatched roofs. The wife, carrying a basket of apples, has an uncertain expression on her face. It's likely that she's checking out the half-dressed man in her yard, and thinking about how her husband doesn't stack up so well. On the table in the foreground, in pride of place, is a plate piled high with eels. NOW it's a feast.
November 27, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Thanksgiving is upon us! So...how best to show your distain to your terrible relatives? How about eel pie?

In his 15th C. cookbook, Bartolomeo Platina includes a recipe for eel pie w/ instructions to feed it to your foes when it's done, because eel pie has no redeeming features.
🗃️🧪
Meme. Painting of Bartolomeno Platina kneeling to meet with the pope. I've cut the pope out of the picture, so you'll have to take my word for it. Barty is wearing a red shirt with a blue sleeveless doublet. It's quite natty, and you might believe that it's a Patagonia fleece vest. Bart's silver hair is carefully sculpted and cut, and he is carrying *just* enough of a 5 o'clock shadow to be sexy, and not enough to be slovenly. Women want him, and men want to be him. And he knows it. The expression on his face might be taken for intent interest. His eyebrow is arched, his gaze is intense, and his jaw might be quivering with attentiveness. But it's more likely that he is feigning interest with an expertise born of long practice...like a grad student stuck in the front row of a lecture by an imminent, but terribly dull, guest speaker. Bart is, instead, probably thinking about shots of pumpkin-spice vodka. Meme text reads: "I've baked you a pie because you mean that much to me"
November 26, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Public transport isn't just for Middle Earth. Narnia's getting in on the act!

I've drawn a subway map covering all 7 books of The Chronicles of Narnia. Follow the plots lines, but don't touch the third rail! #Narnia #Maps #Subway

You can buy prints on my Etsy store:
www.etsy.com/listing/4345...
A subway style map on a parchment background. The map's title reads: "Narnia Transit Map: Talking Beasts Ride Free." The map has seven keys, one for each of the seven books in C.S. Lewis's Narinia series. The main movements of characters and action in each book are traced by colored lines, like a subway map. Locations in each book are marked out as stops in the lines. There is a drawing of a lion above the title of the map, and in the lower right corner there is a compass rose. A subway style map on a parchment background. The map's title reads: "Narnia Transit Map: Talking Beasts Ride Free." The map has seven keys, one for each of the seven books in C.S. Lewis's Narinia series. The main movements of characters and action in each book are traced by colored lines, like a subway map. Locations in each book are marked out as stops in the lines. There is a drawing of a lion above the title of the map, and in the lower right corner there is a compass rose.
November 26, 2025 at 6:44 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Public transport isn't just for Middle Earth. Narnia's getting in on the act!

I've drawn a subway map covering all 7 books of The Chronicles of Narnia. Follow the plots lines, but don't touch the third rail! #Narnia #Maps #Subway

You can buy prints on my Etsy store:
www.etsy.com/listing/4345...
A subway style map on a parchment background. The map's title reads: "Narnia Transit Map: Talking Beasts Ride Free." The map has seven keys, one for each of the seven books in C.S. Lewis's Narinia series. The main movements of characters and action in each book are traced by colored lines, like a subway map. Locations in each book are marked out as stops in the lines. There is a drawing of a lion above the title of the map, and in the lower right corner there is a compass rose. A subway style map on a parchment background. The map's title reads: "Narnia Transit Map: Talking Beasts Ride Free." The map has seven keys, one for each of the seven books in C.S. Lewis's Narinia series. The main movements of characters and action in each book are traced by colored lines, like a subway map. Locations in each book are marked out as stops in the lines. There is a drawing of a lion above the title of the map, and in the lower right corner there is a compass rose.
November 26, 2025 at 6:44 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Thanksgiving is upon us! So...how best to show your distain to your terrible relatives? How about eel pie?

In his 15th C. cookbook, Bartolomeo Platina includes a recipe for eel pie w/ instructions to feed it to your foes when it's done, because eel pie has no redeeming features.
🗃️🧪
Meme. Painting of Bartolomeno Platina kneeling to meet with the pope. I've cut the pope out of the picture, so you'll have to take my word for it. Barty is wearing a red shirt with a blue sleeveless doublet. It's quite natty, and you might believe that it's a Patagonia fleece vest. Bart's silver hair is carefully sculpted and cut, and he is carrying *just* enough of a 5 o'clock shadow to be sexy, and not enough to be slovenly. Women want him, and men want to be him. And he knows it. The expression on his face might be taken for intent interest. His eyebrow is arched, his gaze is intense, and his jaw might be quivering with attentiveness. But it's more likely that he is feigning interest with an expertise born of long practice...like a grad student stuck in the front row of a lecture by an imminent, but terribly dull, guest speaker. Bart is, instead, probably thinking about shots of pumpkin-spice vodka. Meme text reads: "I've baked you a pie because you mean that much to me"
November 26, 2025 at 4:50 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
I’m a pretty dedicated agnostic, and even I know this to be true
vulture.com Vulture @vulture.com · 1d
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
Even God Is Worried About ChatGPT
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
www.vulture.com
November 26, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
ajr595.bsky.social
The map posts are really interesting, if anyone feels like joining up.
greenleejw.bsky.social Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 2d
Each week on my patreon, I write about maps and about the process of drawing maps for books.

I'm hoping to get membership up over 500 subscribers, and we're close! It's free, so if you're curious, go read some articles. If you like it, please consider subscribing!
patreon.com/SurprisedEel
Surprised Eel Maps | Patreon
Custom Maps, Artwork, and History
patreon.com
November 26, 2025 at 10:14 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
There would be no eel history posts. A terrible, dark age. All would despair.

(No, autocorrect. I did not mean to say, “All would Doritos.”)
November 26, 2025 at 6:09 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Each week on my patreon, I write about maps and about the process of drawing maps for books.

I'm hoping to get membership up over 500 subscribers, and we're close! It's free, so if you're curious, go read some articles. If you like it, please consider subscribing!
patreon.com/SurprisedEel
Surprised Eel Maps | Patreon
Custom Maps, Artwork, and History
patreon.com
November 25, 2025 at 7:19 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
It's axiomatic! You have to hold them by the head!

In pre-modern England, the expression, "Holding an eel by the tail" meant that you were doing something the wrong way. Like...did you just buy a cyber truck so that you could look cool and pick up women? You, sir, are holding an eel by the tail.
biologizing.bsky.social Sophie W @biologizing.bsky.social · 2d
If you ever wonder why people say "slippery as an eel" I can confirm that one time we had to hold an eel for a vet to do a blood draw and that eel ended up on the floor 47 times out of 48 attempts
November 26, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
adapalmer.bsky.social
Come for the eels, stay for the really fascinating map discussions, mixing history, communications, and design!
greenleejw.bsky.social Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 2d
Each week on my patreon, I write about maps and about the process of drawing maps for books.

I'm hoping to get membership up over 500 subscribers, and we're close! It's free, so if you're curious, go read some articles. If you like it, please consider subscribing!
patreon.com/SurprisedEel
Surprised Eel Maps | Patreon
Custom Maps, Artwork, and History
patreon.com
November 25, 2025 at 11:00 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Each week on my patreon, I write about maps and about the process of drawing maps for books.

I'm hoping to get membership up over 500 subscribers, and we're close! It's free, so if you're curious, go read some articles. If you like it, please consider subscribing!
patreon.com/SurprisedEel
Surprised Eel Maps | Patreon
Custom Maps, Artwork, and History
patreon.com
November 25, 2025 at 7:19 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
We have very few eel-related metaphors English now. But there used to be many more.

One of my favorites is from William Lisle’s 1631 play "The Faire Ætheopian" where he describes a procession of haughty maids as being “smug as Eeles."

Have you ever been that smug? Has anyone?
🗃️🧪
Meme. Photograph of an eel underwater, in front of some grasses. You can only see the eel's head and fins, and a bit of its body. The eel is coming into view from the right side of the screen, and is headed left like a college student reading Marx for the first time. Unlike that student, though, the eel is not insufferable. You suffer it happily. The eel is grey-brown on top, and white underneath. It seems to be smiling at you. Not a joyful smile, or even the smile you save for old half-friends who you run into while shopping. It's the inward-facing smile of a fish that's seem more of the world than you, and is content with its own capacity for cannibalism. The eel's eye is looking past you, or possibly through you. It will almost certainly forget you as soon as you're gone. The eel's perspective on the world, and time, and history make you feel unimportant. And that is its gift to you. Meme text reads: "Putting the 'smug' back in 'World's most smuggled animal"
November 25, 2025 at 4:28 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
We have very few eel-related metaphors English now. But there used to be many more.

One of my favorites is from William Lisle’s 1631 play "The Faire Ætheopian" where he describes a procession of haughty maids as being “smug as Eeles."

Have you ever been that smug? Has anyone?
🗃️🧪
Meme. Photograph of an eel underwater, in front of some grasses. You can only see the eel's head and fins, and a bit of its body. The eel is coming into view from the right side of the screen, and is headed left like a college student reading Marx for the first time. Unlike that student, though, the eel is not insufferable. You suffer it happily. The eel is grey-brown on top, and white underneath. It seems to be smiling at you. Not a joyful smile, or even the smile you save for old half-friends who you run into while shopping. It's the inward-facing smile of a fish that's seem more of the world than you, and is content with its own capacity for cannibalism. The eel's eye is looking past you, or possibly through you. It will almost certainly forget you as soon as you're gone. The eel's perspective on the world, and time, and history make you feel unimportant. And that is its gift to you. Meme text reads: "Putting the 'smug' back in 'World's most smuggled animal"
November 25, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Would you like to see a medieval landlord who collected eel-rents? Well then.

I present to you Robert, Count of Mortain & half-brother to William the Conqueror. He's on the right. The Domesday survey records that Robert received 8,125 eels each year, from a total of 8 rents.
🗃️🧪
Scene from the Bayeux Tapestry showing William the Conqueror seated on his throne. To the left of him is Bishop Odo, and to the right is Robert. Each man has his name floating above his head, which is probably not historically accurate. William is wearing red, and holding a sword upright in his lap. He's looking at Odo with some concern. Odo, for his part, has his hands up, with one hand pointing at the king as if he's explaining something important. William had one hand on his chest, and is looking a little startled. The sense of the conversation between them is a bit like Odo is telling the king that SOMEONE has eaten all of the oatmeal raison cookies, and the king is feigning innocence. On the other side of the king, Robert is reaching for his own sword. He looks surprised. Apparently the oatmeal raison cookies were very popular, and he's distraught to learn that they're gone. His blue chain mail probably does not have cookie pockets, but this is why you have a squire.
November 24, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
For this week's post, I've written about the maps, family trees, and diagrams that I made for Alan Stahl's recent book about Renaissance Venice, "The House of Condulmer." (published by @pennpress.bsky.social

Like most of my posts, it's free, so give it a read!

www.patreon.com/posts/maps-t...
Maps, Trees, and Labels: Three Kinds of Work for The House of Condulmer | Surprised Eel Maps
Get more from Surprised Eel Maps on Patreon
www.patreon.com
November 24, 2025 at 1:19 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Would you like to see a medieval landlord who collected eel-rents? Well then.

I present to you Robert, Count of Mortain & half-brother to William the Conqueror. He's on the right. The Domesday survey records that Robert received 8,125 eels each year, from a total of 8 rents.
🗃️🧪
Scene from the Bayeux Tapestry showing William the Conqueror seated on his throne. To the left of him is Bishop Odo, and to the right is Robert. Each man has his name floating above his head, which is probably not historically accurate. William is wearing red, and holding a sword upright in his lap. He's looking at Odo with some concern. Odo, for his part, has his hands up, with one hand pointing at the king as if he's explaining something important. William had one hand on his chest, and is looking a little startled. The sense of the conversation between them is a bit like Odo is telling the king that SOMEONE has eaten all of the oatmeal raison cookies, and the king is feigning innocence. On the other side of the king, Robert is reaching for his own sword. He looks surprised. Apparently the oatmeal raison cookies were very popular, and he's distraught to learn that they're gone. His blue chain mail probably does not have cookie pockets, but this is why you have a squire.
November 24, 2025 at 6:47 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
For this week's post, I've written about the maps, family trees, and diagrams that I made for Alan Stahl's recent book about Renaissance Venice, "The House of Condulmer." (published by @pennpress.bsky.social

Like most of my posts, it's free, so give it a read!

www.patreon.com/posts/maps-t...
Maps, Trees, and Labels: Three Kinds of Work for The House of Condulmer | Surprised Eel Maps
Get more from Surprised Eel Maps on Patreon
www.patreon.com
November 24, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
bityz.bsky.social
They have a Lots of the Rings subway map!
greenleejw.bsky.social Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 7d
We're at the Middle Earth map.
We're at the subway map.
We're at the combination Middle Earth and Subway map!

And you could be too! These maps and more are for sale on my Etsy page! They make great presents for yourself and others!
#LOTR #maps #subway

www.etsy.com/shop/Surpris...
Art. Subway style map to go with The Lord of the Rings, showing the different pathways of various parties throughout the book. The title reads: "Lord of the Rings Transit Map: One Does Not Simply Walk Ino Mordor When One Can Ride." The map takes up the middle part of the page, and there are two keys. The one on the left is titles "Standard Service Lines, and has color keys matched to the subway lines on the map. Lines are named: "Shire-Bree Commuter Line Old Forrest Crescent Wildland Scenic Line Fellowship Line Gollum / Sméagol Line Uruk Hai Express Three Hunters Line Fangorn Slow Service Rohan to Gondor Business Line Black Ships Ferry Service Oliphant Direct Line Army of the West Line Gandalf Express A smaller key on the right side of the map is labeled: "Limited Service Lines" and has color keys matched to the following names lines: "Eagle Express Paths of the Dead Line Nazgûl Search & Resuce Valinor Ltd." A note at the bottom reads: "* Mount Doom station only accepts Rings of Power in payment. Plan accordingly." Art. Subway-style map of the itinerary in The Hobbit. The main journey is show in three different lines: red (Hobbiton to Goblin Town); green (Goblin Town to the Elvenking's Halls); and blue (Elvenking's Halls to Erebor). There are multiple stops on these lines. There is a yellow line going back from Erebor to Hobbiton, making stops at Beorn's Hall, Rivendell, and the Troll's Lair. There is an orange line directly from the Iron Hills on the map's right side to Erebor, and a purple line from Gundabad directly to Erebor. The map's title reads: "Hobbit Transit Map" and there are directions for both There and Back Again listing the lines and transfer points. Between them, in the middle of the page, is a dragon drawn to resemble the dragon on Thror's Map from The Hobbit. A key shows the names of each colored line: Red: Western Lands Line Green: Mountains and Forests Line Blue: Barrel Line Yellow: Gandalf Express Orange: Iron Hills Business Line Purple: Orc and Goblin Reserve Line Text at the bottom right reads Surprised Eel Maps, 2025
November 23, 2025 at 12:30 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
We're at the Middle Earth map.
We're at the subway map.
We're at the combination Middle Earth and Subway map!

And you could be too! These maps and more are for sale on my Etsy page! They make great presents for yourself and others!
#LOTR #maps #subway

www.etsy.com/shop/Surpris...
Art. Subway style map to go with The Lord of the Rings, showing the different pathways of various parties throughout the book. The title reads: "Lord of the Rings Transit Map: One Does Not Simply Walk Ino Mordor When One Can Ride." The map takes up the middle part of the page, and there are two keys. The one on the left is titles "Standard Service Lines, and has color keys matched to the subway lines on the map. Lines are named: "Shire-Bree Commuter Line Old Forrest Crescent Wildland Scenic Line Fellowship Line Gollum / Sméagol Line Uruk Hai Express Three Hunters Line Fangorn Slow Service Rohan to Gondor Business Line Black Ships Ferry Service Oliphant Direct Line Army of the West Line Gandalf Express A smaller key on the right side of the map is labeled: "Limited Service Lines" and has color keys matched to the following names lines: "Eagle Express Paths of the Dead Line Nazgûl Search & Resuce Valinor Ltd." A note at the bottom reads: "* Mount Doom station only accepts Rings of Power in payment. Plan accordingly." Art. Subway-style map of the itinerary in The Hobbit. The main journey is show in three different lines: red (Hobbiton to Goblin Town); green (Goblin Town to the Elvenking's Halls); and blue (Elvenking's Halls to Erebor). There are multiple stops on these lines. There is a yellow line going back from Erebor to Hobbiton, making stops at Beorn's Hall, Rivendell, and the Troll's Lair. There is an orange line directly from the Iron Hills on the map's right side to Erebor, and a purple line from Gundabad directly to Erebor. The map's title reads: "Hobbit Transit Map" and there are directions for both There and Back Again listing the lines and transfer points. Between them, in the middle of the page, is a dragon drawn to resemble the dragon on Thror's Map from The Hobbit. A key shows the names of each colored line: Red: Western Lands Line Green: Mountains and Forests Line Blue: Barrel Line Yellow: Gandalf Express Orange: Iron Hills Business Line Purple: Orc and Goblin Reserve Line Text at the bottom right reads Surprised Eel Maps, 2025
November 21, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
caperry.bsky.social
Maps! From my forthcoming book and created by @greenleejw.bsky.social. I highly recommend JW Greenlee and especially appreciated his collaborative and iterative process of design. These maps capture the geography implicated in the slave trade that I study in the book. There is ... 1/3
Map 1. From Iberia to India, ca. 1000–1250. Map created by John Wyatt Greenlee of Surprised Eel Mapping. Map 2. Egypt and Northeast Africa, ca. 1000–1250. Map created by John Wyatt Greenlee of Surprised Eel Mapping.
November 21, 2025 at 2:41 PM