The D.C. Universe
@dcuniverse.bsky.social
According to Star Trek canon, MLB folds in 2042. So let’s enjoy baseball while we can.
This was a new one: a guy comes up to me on the street and offers me a $5 bill. Doesn’t say anything. Just holds it out to me. I politely decline and he walks away. But now I’m dying to know what the hustle was supposed to be.
December 11, 2025 at 5:17 PM
This was a new one: a guy comes up to me on the street and offers me a $5 bill. Doesn’t say anything. Just holds it out to me. I politely decline and he walks away. But now I’m dying to know what the hustle was supposed to be.
I wouldn’t have thought shitty AI Instagram videos could become a quality of life issue. But now that almost every video is of babies delivering one-liners, parkour on top of 100-story buildings, or alligators in football stadiums, followed by someone asking “Is this real?!”, I just hate everything.
December 11, 2025 at 3:12 PM
I wouldn’t have thought shitty AI Instagram videos could become a quality of life issue. But now that almost every video is of babies delivering one-liners, parkour on top of 100-story buildings, or alligators in football stadiums, followed by someone asking “Is this real?!”, I just hate everything.
Really worried about Mr. Met. Looks like he’s just one more piece of bad news away from…well, you know.
December 11, 2025 at 3:09 AM
Really worried about Mr. Met. Looks like he’s just one more piece of bad news away from…well, you know.
Stopped by Target worried that maybe they closed at 9 instead of 10. I’d forgotten what time of year it is. So they’re open until midnight.
Now I’m wondering: does this actually make sense in 2025? Are there really people Christmas shopping at Target at 11:30 PM on Dec. 10? Or is it just tradition?
Now I’m wondering: does this actually make sense in 2025? Are there really people Christmas shopping at Target at 11:30 PM on Dec. 10? Or is it just tradition?
December 11, 2025 at 2:50 AM
Stopped by Target worried that maybe they closed at 9 instead of 10. I’d forgotten what time of year it is. So they’re open until midnight.
Now I’m wondering: does this actually make sense in 2025? Are there really people Christmas shopping at Target at 11:30 PM on Dec. 10? Or is it just tradition?
Now I’m wondering: does this actually make sense in 2025? Are there really people Christmas shopping at Target at 11:30 PM on Dec. 10? Or is it just tradition?
Huge day for technology that no one wants.
December 10, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Huge day for technology that no one wants.
Depends!
Nats trading Soto when the team A) Had taken a huge Covid financial hit, B) Was up for sale, and C) Had no chance to contend, sucked. Fans HATED it.
It was the right move.
OTOH, the Mets both need and can afford Alonso, and their window is now, not 2030. So yeah, throw the fans a bone.
Nats trading Soto when the team A) Had taken a huge Covid financial hit, B) Was up for sale, and C) Had no chance to contend, sucked. Fans HATED it.
It was the right move.
OTOH, the Mets both need and can afford Alonso, and their window is now, not 2030. So yeah, throw the fans a bone.
this is going to sound colder than I intend it to (and there is PR value in pretending to), but anyone working in baseball ops should basically never give a shit how beloved players are
Here’s the bizarre paradox the Mets front office and fans are (were?) in: the team hasn’t been that good but they have/had a lot of really beloved players. You can’t get better without changing the players but you absolutely must nail their replacements.
December 10, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Depends!
Nats trading Soto when the team A) Had taken a huge Covid financial hit, B) Was up for sale, and C) Had no chance to contend, sucked. Fans HATED it.
It was the right move.
OTOH, the Mets both need and can afford Alonso, and their window is now, not 2030. So yeah, throw the fans a bone.
Nats trading Soto when the team A) Had taken a huge Covid financial hit, B) Was up for sale, and C) Had no chance to contend, sucked. Fans HATED it.
It was the right move.
OTOH, the Mets both need and can afford Alonso, and their window is now, not 2030. So yeah, throw the fans a bone.
Holy fuck.
Good for the Orioles. I mean, I hate them. And I wish it had been us. But good for the Orioles.
Good for the Orioles. I mean, I hate them. And I wish it had been us. But good for the Orioles.
December 10, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Holy fuck.
Good for the Orioles. I mean, I hate them. And I wish it had been us. But good for the Orioles.
Good for the Orioles. I mean, I hate them. And I wish it had been us. But good for the Orioles.
I really thought Walters was going to be A Guy.
Instead, his biggest contribution to Washington Nationals canon ended up being this:
Instead, his biggest contribution to Washington Nationals canon ended up being this:
December 10, 2025 at 2:24 PM
I really thought Walters was going to be A Guy.
Instead, his biggest contribution to Washington Nationals canon ended up being this:
Instead, his biggest contribution to Washington Nationals canon ended up being this:
If I were Brandon Nimmo, I’d be *incredibly* pissed right now.
But also, if I were Brandon Nimmo, when the Mets informed me that they no longer wanted me on the team and would I mind terribly waiving my no-trade clause, I would have told David Stearns to go fuck himself.
But also, if I were Brandon Nimmo, when the Mets informed me that they no longer wanted me on the team and would I mind terribly waiving my no-trade clause, I would have told David Stearns to go fuck himself.
December 10, 2025 at 3:25 AM
If I were Brandon Nimmo, I’d be *incredibly* pissed right now.
But also, if I were Brandon Nimmo, when the Mets informed me that they no longer wanted me on the team and would I mind terribly waiving my no-trade clause, I would have told David Stearns to go fuck himself.
But also, if I were Brandon Nimmo, when the Mets informed me that they no longer wanted me on the team and would I mind terribly waiving my no-trade clause, I would have told David Stearns to go fuck himself.
I hate that my good friend Times New Roman is being dragged into the culture war.
It is the best font for work, though. Clean. Unassuming. Gets the job done. The path Rubio took to get there is dumb and weird, but he’s not wrong.
It is the best font for work, though. Clean. Unassuming. Gets the job done. The path Rubio took to get there is dumb and weird, but he’s not wrong.
Marco Rubio ordered diplomats to return to using Times New Roman font in official communications, calling his predecessor's decision to adopt Calibri a “wasteful” diversity move
Rubio Stages Font Coup: Times New Roman Ousts Calibri
The secretary of state called it a "wasteful" diversity move, according to an internal department cable seen by Reuters.
www.huffpost.com
December 10, 2025 at 1:33 AM
I hate that my good friend Times New Roman is being dragged into the culture war.
It is the best font for work, though. Clean. Unassuming. Gets the job done. The path Rubio took to get there is dumb and weird, but he’s not wrong.
It is the best font for work, though. Clean. Unassuming. Gets the job done. The path Rubio took to get there is dumb and weird, but he’s not wrong.
Took nearly 20 years, but I finally got around to watching Damages. I don’t know if it’s especially great, but casting was incredible: Ted Danson as an evil billionaire. Martin Short as a shady attorney. Timothy Olyphant. Darrell Hammond. A young Ebon Moss-Bachrach, who I’d just assumed was born 40…
December 9, 2025 at 7:18 PM
Took nearly 20 years, but I finally got around to watching Damages. I don’t know if it’s especially great, but casting was incredible: Ted Danson as an evil billionaire. Martin Short as a shady attorney. Timothy Olyphant. Darrell Hammond. A young Ebon Moss-Bachrach, who I’d just assumed was born 40…
The Mets lost their closer over $3 million and deferrals? What’s the point of being Steve Cohen if you’re not going to do Steve Cohen shit?
By comparison, he once paid over $140 million for this hideous statue. That’s two Edwin Diazes!
By comparison, he once paid over $140 million for this hideous statue. That’s two Edwin Diazes!
December 9, 2025 at 6:38 PM
The Mets lost their closer over $3 million and deferrals? What’s the point of being Steve Cohen if you’re not going to do Steve Cohen shit?
By comparison, he once paid over $140 million for this hideous statue. That’s two Edwin Diazes!
By comparison, he once paid over $140 million for this hideous statue. That’s two Edwin Diazes!
Bummer that Schwarber ended up back with the Phillies. At least other teams made them work for it. There were quite a few armchair GMs on Phillies Reddit saying anything more than three years was absurd.
I don’t get what the Mets are doing. You’re paying Soto $765M but balk at $69M for Diaz?
I don’t get what the Mets are doing. You’re paying Soto $765M but balk at $69M for Diaz?
December 9, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Bummer that Schwarber ended up back with the Phillies. At least other teams made them work for it. There were quite a few armchair GMs on Phillies Reddit saying anything more than three years was absurd.
I don’t get what the Mets are doing. You’re paying Soto $765M but balk at $69M for Diaz?
I don’t get what the Mets are doing. You’re paying Soto $765M but balk at $69M for Diaz?
I went 2/5 on 2026 Nationals bobbleheads:
1) Grogu (better be wearing a jersey!)
2) D.C. Sports Legend
3) Abrams
4) Lile
5) Captain America
6) Wood
They apparently went super-careful (“Okay, who can we be sure WON’T be traded?”) and they still might have to replace one of the bobbleheads.
1) Grogu (better be wearing a jersey!)
2) D.C. Sports Legend
3) Abrams
4) Lile
5) Captain America
6) Wood
They apparently went super-careful (“Okay, who can we be sure WON’T be traded?”) and they still might have to replace one of the bobbleheads.
Since we’re potentially a week away from the reveal of the 2026 Nationals promo schedule, here are my bobblehead predictions, made a bit more challenging given that a decent chunk of the roster could be traded or moved to the bullpen before Opening Day:
1) Wood
2) Gray
3) Butera
4) Cavalli
5) Lile
1) Wood
2) Gray
3) Butera
4) Cavalli
5) Lile
December 9, 2025 at 3:18 PM
I went 2/5 on 2026 Nationals bobbleheads:
1) Grogu (better be wearing a jersey!)
2) D.C. Sports Legend
3) Abrams
4) Lile
5) Captain America
6) Wood
They apparently went super-careful (“Okay, who can we be sure WON’T be traded?”) and they still might have to replace one of the bobbleheads.
1) Grogu (better be wearing a jersey!)
2) D.C. Sports Legend
3) Abrams
4) Lile
5) Captain America
6) Wood
They apparently went super-careful (“Okay, who can we be sure WON’T be traded?”) and they still might have to replace one of the bobbleheads.
Dan Snyder Bobblehead Day?
December 9, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Dan Snyder Bobblehead Day?
If you’re upset at the idea of the Nationals trading CJ Abrams, you should register your complaints with the Lerners (good luck getting a hold of them) or Mike Rizzo (probably smoking a cigar on a beach, completely indifferent), not the guy who inherited a 66-96 team and the 24th-ranked farm system.
December 8, 2025 at 7:24 PM
If you’re upset at the idea of the Nationals trading CJ Abrams, you should register your complaints with the Lerners (good luck getting a hold of them) or Mike Rizzo (probably smoking a cigar on a beach, completely indifferent), not the guy who inherited a 66-96 team and the 24th-ranked farm system.
Do it, Paul.
December 8, 2025 at 6:12 PM
Do it, Paul.
Picturing a “Who’s on First?”-type routine, where Harry Ford explains to his British friends, who knew he played baseball in Washington, that he’s been traded to Washington.
Harry Ford just met with reporters over Zoom. Was legitimately stunned by trade, loved Mariners org, but is looking forward to opportunity with similarly young Nats. He's currently in Oxford, England (where his father lives), says he plays to again play for Great Britain in WBC.
December 8, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Picturing a “Who’s on First?”-type routine, where Harry Ford explains to his British friends, who knew he played baseball in Washington, that he’s been traded to Washington.
I get that it’s Jim Bowden and so this is just baseball writer fan-fic. But the fact that he felt comfortable even suggesting that a plausible return for Gore would be SF’s #7 and #11 prospects, is annoying.
Luckily, the Ford trade shows that Toboni isn’t the pushover Bowden apparently envisions.
Luckily, the Ford trade shows that Toboni isn’t the pushover Bowden apparently envisions.
December 8, 2025 at 1:13 PM
I get that it’s Jim Bowden and so this is just baseball writer fan-fic. But the fact that he felt comfortable even suggesting that a plausible return for Gore would be SF’s #7 and #11 prospects, is annoying.
Luckily, the Ford trade shows that Toboni isn’t the pushover Bowden apparently envisions.
Luckily, the Ford trade shows that Toboni isn’t the pushover Bowden apparently envisions.
Potentially the most powerful technology ever created and this is mostly what it’s being used for.
Okay, the Danny Masterson thing made me laugh.
Okay, the Danny Masterson thing made me laugh.
December 8, 2025 at 4:22 AM
Potentially the most powerful technology ever created and this is mostly what it’s being used for.
Okay, the Danny Masterson thing made me laugh.
Okay, the Danny Masterson thing made me laugh.
As anyone who has seen Freddy vs. Jason, Alien vs. Predator, etc. knows, even when two bad guys are fighting, you can’t help but root for one of them.
Milo Yiannopoulos is a piece of shit who thankfully destroyed his own career before he could do any major damage. But he’s still better than Benny.
Milo Yiannopoulos is a piece of shit who thankfully destroyed his own career before he could do any major damage. But he’s still better than Benny.
Milo Yiannopoulos responds to Benny Johnson’s threat of litigation.
People have been talking publicly on social media about Benny’s sexual orientation for years — since 2017 — and it’s discussed openly within GOP circles.
Former colleagues of his from BuzzFeed have shared their accounts publicly.
People have been talking publicly on social media about Benny’s sexual orientation for years — since 2017 — and it’s discussed openly within GOP circles.
Former colleagues of his from BuzzFeed have shared their accounts publicly.
December 8, 2025 at 12:11 AM
As anyone who has seen Freddy vs. Jason, Alien vs. Predator, etc. knows, even when two bad guys are fighting, you can’t help but root for one of them.
Milo Yiannopoulos is a piece of shit who thankfully destroyed his own career before he could do any major damage. But he’s still better than Benny.
Milo Yiannopoulos is a piece of shit who thankfully destroyed his own career before he could do any major damage. But he’s still better than Benny.
Not paying attention to the Commanders during the second half of the season has done wonders for my mental health.
It also leaves me more time to, uh…constantly check social media to see if my favorite baseball team has traded its best pitcher. Because for some reason, that would be a good thing.
It also leaves me more time to, uh…constantly check social media to see if my favorite baseball team has traded its best pitcher. Because for some reason, that would be a good thing.
December 7, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Not paying attention to the Commanders during the second half of the season has done wonders for my mental health.
It also leaves me more time to, uh…constantly check social media to see if my favorite baseball team has traded its best pitcher. Because for some reason, that would be a good thing.
It also leaves me more time to, uh…constantly check social media to see if my favorite baseball team has traded its best pitcher. Because for some reason, that would be a good thing.
Unless the Tigers want to get crazy, this is maybe the only one-for-one trade that realistically exists for Gore.
December 7, 2025 at 8:13 PM
Unless the Tigers want to get crazy, this is maybe the only one-for-one trade that realistically exists for Gore.
I started watching the Starfleet Academy preview but couldn’t make it through the whole thing.
1) The FX somehow look worse than SNW’s.
2) Why is Holly Hunter wearing glasses in the 32nd century?!
3) Jumping from the 25th century (Picard) to the 32nd was a catastrophic mistake for the franchise.
1) The FX somehow look worse than SNW’s.
2) Why is Holly Hunter wearing glasses in the 32nd century?!
3) Jumping from the 25th century (Picard) to the 32nd was a catastrophic mistake for the franchise.
December 7, 2025 at 7:22 PM
I started watching the Starfleet Academy preview but couldn’t make it through the whole thing.
1) The FX somehow look worse than SNW’s.
2) Why is Holly Hunter wearing glasses in the 32nd century?!
3) Jumping from the 25th century (Picard) to the 32nd was a catastrophic mistake for the franchise.
1) The FX somehow look worse than SNW’s.
2) Why is Holly Hunter wearing glasses in the 32nd century?!
3) Jumping from the 25th century (Picard) to the 32nd was a catastrophic mistake for the franchise.
Being AJ Preller on a tight budget must really suck.
I’d say the Padres should keep their money and just trade for MacKenzie Gore. But…trade what?
I’d say the Padres should keep their money and just trade for MacKenzie Gore. But…trade what?
December 7, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Being AJ Preller on a tight budget must really suck.
I’d say the Padres should keep their money and just trade for MacKenzie Gore. But…trade what?
I’d say the Padres should keep their money and just trade for MacKenzie Gore. But…trade what?