Christopher Monks
@crmonks.bsky.social
Editor of McSweeney’s Internet Tendency. Author of The Ultimate Game Guide to Your Life. Dominator of waiting rooms. Fragile fan of the Dolphins, Sixers, and Red Sox.
McSweeney's living legend, @mikelacher.bsky.social, returns to the site today with his first font-themed satire since "I'm Comic Sans, Asshole."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
Times New Roman Turns Right
“Secretary of State Marco Rubio called the Biden-era move to [Calibri] ‘wasteful,’ casting the return to Times New Roman as part of a push to stamp...
www.mcsweeneys.net
December 11, 2025 at 9:44 PM
McSweeney's living legend, @mikelacher.bsky.social, returns to the site today with his first font-themed satire since "I'm Comic Sans, Asshole."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tim...
Mabel doing her best to dominate her vet’s waiting room.
December 10, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Mabel doing her best to dominate her vet’s waiting room.
We need either @showmanandydaly.bsky.social or @markproksch.bsky.social to play this guy.
Hassett: "AI is making it so there's a great coach for every worker. So instead of having to get the supervisor to explain why the machine isn't working right, you can Google or AI it or ChatGPT & it tells you how to do it right away & you become more productive & it saves the supervisor time"
December 9, 2025 at 9:41 PM
We need either @showmanandydaly.bsky.social or @markproksch.bsky.social to play this guy.
December 8, 2025 at 10:38 PM
Understand that you’re experimenting with a drone, but this is not a fun angle for us watching at home, @nbcsportsphiladelphia.com.
December 8, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Understand that you’re experimenting with a drone, but this is not a fun angle for us watching at home, @nbcsportsphiladelphia.com.
I’ll get back to you in a few, need more time to process this Village People performance at the World Cup Draw.
December 5, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I’ll get back to you in a few, need more time to process this Village People performance at the World Cup Draw.
The molds for Trump’s World Cup Peace trophy were made from the hands of the boaters he war crimed.
December 5, 2025 at 6:29 PM
The molds for Trump’s World Cup Peace trophy were made from the hands of the boaters he war crimed.
Another absolute banger by Mike on the site today.
I wrote a bit for McSweeney's about Isaac Chotiner interviewing Santa Claus. Just a little something for the holiday season. Enjoy!
The New Yorker’s Isaac Chotiner Interviews Santa Claus
For several centuries, Santa Claus has been one of the most prolific mythical gift-givers in the world. Formerly known as Saint Nicholas of Myra, a...
www.mcsweeneys.net
December 4, 2025 at 7:16 PM
Another absolute banger by Mike on the site today.
Brilliant idea putting a baby monitor in the Cabinet Room.
December 2, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Brilliant idea putting a baby monitor in the Cabinet Room.
“Thank you, Mr. President.” Again, the antiquated decorum by the press is so ridiculously bad. He evades a question about his MRI, mentions how he aced that cognitive test for people with dementia, trashes two reporters, and after all that, they thank him for his time. Cowards.
Reporter: Governor Walz called for the release of your MRI results
Trump: They were perfect like my phone call where I got impeached.
Reporter: Can you tell us what they were looking at?
Trump: I have no idea. It was just an MRI. It wasn’t the brain because I took a cognitive test and aced it.
Trump: They were perfect like my phone call where I got impeached.
Reporter: Can you tell us what they were looking at?
Trump: I have no idea. It was just an MRI. It wasn’t the brain because I took a cognitive test and aced it.
December 1, 2025 at 2:23 AM
“Thank you, Mr. President.” Again, the antiquated decorum by the press is so ridiculously bad. He evades a question about his MRI, mentions how he aced that cognitive test for people with dementia, trashes two reporters, and after all that, they thank him for his time. Cowards.
The guy who looks like he’s sitting at an empty bake sale table might actually be the stupid person here.
“You’re a stupid person” — Trump lashes out at a reporter who presses him on the fact that the suspected DC shooter was actually thoroughly vetted before he was let in the US from Afghanistan
November 28, 2025 at 1:41 AM
The guy who looks like he’s sitting at an empty bake sale table might actually be the stupid person here.
Fair, both sides, etc., etc.
Hold up
November 15, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Fair, both sides, etc., etc.
Understandable.
Trump just told reporters on Air Force One that he hasn’t ruled out a pardon for Ghislane Maxwell
November 15, 2025 at 12:23 AM
Understandable.
We passed on this—the writing was way over the top, and it watered down the satire. Still, good to see it find a home elsewhere. www.nytimes.com/2025/11/14/s...
Olivia Nuzzi Did It All for Love
www.nytimes.com
November 14, 2025 at 6:56 PM
We passed on this—the writing was way over the top, and it watered down the satire. Still, good to see it find a home elsewhere. www.nytimes.com/2025/11/14/s...
I am completely dominating my dentist’s waiting room right now.
November 13, 2025 at 4:00 PM
I am completely dominating my dentist’s waiting room right now.
Maybe the reason why we feel like our elected officials and journalistic institutions have failed us is because our ejected officials and journalistic institutions have failed us?
yeah it's a good thing Landon didn't publish any of this shit. the Times might have had to bump an article about trans people.
bsky.app/profile/arid...
bsky.app/profile/arid...
“would you like photos of donald and girls in bikinis in my kitchen?” -Jeffrey Epstein
November 12, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Maybe the reason why we feel like our elected officials and journalistic institutions have failed us is because our ejected officials and journalistic institutions have failed us?
We’re definitely in the market for satire about today’s leak, but maybe we should just publish them verbatim?
November 12, 2025 at 11:08 PM
We’re definitely in the market for satire about today’s leak, but maybe we should just publish them verbatim?
Thanks for your service, Mayor-Elect Zamdani.
November 8, 2025 at 11:14 PM
Thanks for your service, Mayor-Elect Zamdani.
And these beautiful books behind me? Don’t tell anyone but: it’s the Epstein files.
November 7, 2025 at 11:03 PM
And these beautiful books behind me? Don’t tell anyone but: it’s the Epstein files.
Is he reconsidering because he’s having a stroke?
Big Apple billionaire John Catsimatidis planned to move his business to New Jersey if Zohran Mamdani was elected mayor. Now he’s reconsidering.
Supermarket Billionaire Reacts To Mamdani’s Win
Big Apple billionaire John Catsimatidis planned to move his business to New Jersey if Zohran Mamdani was elected mayor. Now he’s reconsidering.
www.forbes.com
November 7, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Is he reconsidering because he’s having a stroke?
Weird seeing Mr. Monopoly without his top hat, mustache, and cane.
The sense of entitlement from these people. Jesus.
Canadian multimillionaire and Shark Tank guy Kevin O'Leary went on TV to say he's upset Zohran won't talk to him: "I and others who invest in real estate have tried to get a meeting to figure out what's rhetoric and what's policy. So far for me it's been crickets."
November 7, 2025 at 7:47 PM
Weird seeing Mr. Monopoly without his top hat, mustache, and cane.
We were looking for a good quote to set up the satire here, but nothing clicked. Then Douthat’s op-ed dropped late morning, and well, thank you New York Times yet again.
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/yea...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/yea...
Yeah, He Won, but He Was Up Against a Deeply Flawed Candidate
“I’m skeptical. The odds are that Mamdani’s victory is actually less significant than you think.” — Ross Douthat, New York Times
- - -I was as surp...
www.mcsweeneys.net
November 5, 2025 at 11:49 PM
We were looking for a good quote to set up the satire here, but nothing clicked. Then Douthat’s op-ed dropped late morning, and well, thank you New York Times yet again.
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/yea...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/yea...
Looks like it’s the Republicans who should move toward the center.
November 5, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Looks like it’s the Republicans who should move toward the center.