Cottage in the Woods
@cottageinwood.bsky.social
🌙 Joel. Reviewer, poet, artist, chef, and Forest Monster from Wellington, NZ (he/him)
Poems in Takahē, Poetry NZ, Turbine, Tarot, The Spinoff, Semaphore, Aotearoa Yearbook, Eunoia Review, and Stone Circle.
2nd place for the 2025 Muriel's Journey Prize.
Poems in Takahē, Poetry NZ, Turbine, Tarot, The Spinoff, Semaphore, Aotearoa Yearbook, Eunoia Review, and Stone Circle.
2nd place for the 2025 Muriel's Journey Prize.
Pinned
📚 My 2025 Reading List: A bookish adventure of woods, monsters, folklore, cosmic horrors, and magic. 📚
I wonder if the myth of Santa Claus is simply how we slowly prepare kids for a life of state surveillance.
December 15, 2025 at 3:29 AM
I wonder if the myth of Santa Claus is simply how we slowly prepare kids for a life of state surveillance.
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
I am choosing to keep this essay permanently unpaywalled. It's about the general idea of people reaching their artistic peak later in life, and the amazing art my parents have been producing in their 60s and 70s (much of which has made its way into my books):
www.tom-cox.com/the-magic-ro...
www.tom-cox.com/the-magic-ro...
THE MAGIC ROOM
Subscribe now
I'm reposting this piece I wrote a little while ago about my mum and dad's art, which some you might have seen, but many of you won't, since I also wanted to let you know about a few bi...
www.tom-cox.com
December 14, 2025 at 11:48 AM
I am choosing to keep this essay permanently unpaywalled. It's about the general idea of people reaching their artistic peak later in life, and the amazing art my parents have been producing in their 60s and 70s (much of which has made its way into my books):
www.tom-cox.com/the-magic-ro...
www.tom-cox.com/the-magic-ro...
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
6 Habits That Will Change Your Life:
1. Exercise
2. Cooking
3. Meditation
4. Reading
5. Moving to Maine and joining the Starry Wisdom Cult of the Drowned God
6. Socializing
ㅤ
1. Exercise
2. Cooking
3. Meditation
4. Reading
5. Moving to Maine and joining the Starry Wisdom Cult of the Drowned God
6. Socializing
ㅤ
July 2, 2025 at 9:55 PM
6 Habits That Will Change Your Life:
1. Exercise
2. Cooking
3. Meditation
4. Reading
5. Moving to Maine and joining the Starry Wisdom Cult of the Drowned God
6. Socializing
ㅤ
1. Exercise
2. Cooking
3. Meditation
4. Reading
5. Moving to Maine and joining the Starry Wisdom Cult of the Drowned God
6. Socializing
ㅤ
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
Nothing can make our life, or the lives of other people, more beautiful than perpetual kindness.
~Leo Tolstoy
art by Lennart Helje
~Leo Tolstoy
art by Lennart Helje
December 14, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Nothing can make our life, or the lives of other people, more beautiful than perpetual kindness.
~Leo Tolstoy
art by Lennart Helje
~Leo Tolstoy
art by Lennart Helje
If I wasn't so constantly tired, dehydrated, and behind on laundry, I probably could take over the world.
December 14, 2025 at 5:53 AM
If I wasn't so constantly tired, dehydrated, and behind on laundry, I probably could take over the world.
I feel this.
December 13, 2025 at 8:57 PM
I feel this.
Two poems of mine just dropped on Eunoia Review.. including "Three Little Pigs" about that one time a straight friend kissed me and then never spoke to me again. 💔
Three Little Pigs
Three of us walked from bar to bar, the laughing midnight of Auckland City wrapped around our shoulders, a rare evening between two straight uni students and their soft heartbroken gay flatmate, a …
eunoiareview.wordpress.com
December 13, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Two poems of mine just dropped on Eunoia Review.. including "Three Little Pigs" about that one time a straight friend kissed me and then never spoke to me again. 💔
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
My poem "The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick." was published today in takahē magazine, and will be available both online and in print ❤️
The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick. - takahē
You were supposed to die quietly,politely walk off into the bush and vanish beneath the tōtara and tutu,never making anyone uncomfortable, so they will be mad at you for this: the darkly glittering br...
www.takahe.org.nz
December 12, 2025 at 9:35 PM
My poem "The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick." was published today in takahē magazine, and will be available both online and in print ❤️
Ok, now let's give this hot mess from 2011 a try. I haven't seen it since it first came out, but I remember being underwelmed. I know there was some drama behind the scenes on the production of this film as well.
December 13, 2025 at 5:52 AM
Ok, now let's give this hot mess from 2011 a try. I haven't seen it since it first came out, but I remember being underwelmed. I know there was some drama behind the scenes on the production of this film as well.
One of the things that make "The Thing" such a classic film is how quiet it is. Very little soundtrack, and when there is music, it's very low-key, quiet, and atmospheric. Often the only sound is the howling snow and wind, which increases the sense of cold and dread.
Rewatching "The Thing" (1982) on the Internet Archive and...it's actually an upload of an old VHS tape. The quality is so gritty and dated.
I'm obsessed 🤩
I'm obsessed 🤩
December 13, 2025 at 4:51 AM
One of the things that make "The Thing" such a classic film is how quiet it is. Very little soundtrack, and when there is music, it's very low-key, quiet, and atmospheric. Often the only sound is the howling snow and wind, which increases the sense of cold and dread.
Rewatching "The Thing" (1982) on the Internet Archive and...it's actually an upload of an old VHS tape. The quality is so gritty and dated.
I'm obsessed 🤩
I'm obsessed 🤩
December 13, 2025 at 3:55 AM
Rewatching "The Thing" (1982) on the Internet Archive and...it's actually an upload of an old VHS tape. The quality is so gritty and dated.
I'm obsessed 🤩
I'm obsessed 🤩
Going to see "Return of the King" on opening day and nearly being late because the cinema was showing it in every theatre. No parking. Every street full of bumper-to-bumper traffic—all people trying to get close to the cinema. We parked very far away & had to RUN.
Raising the always fun question: What are your most memorable theater-going experiences?
Mine also include The Matrix, Blair Witch, and being way too stoned in Belgium when Fellowship of the Ring was sold out so we sat in the back row for Mulholland Drive instead.
Mine also include The Matrix, Blair Witch, and being way too stoned in Belgium when Fellowship of the Ring was sold out so we sat in the back row for Mulholland Drive instead.
It was hands-down one of the most memorable theater-going experiences I can remember, a collective 30-minute butt-clench/armrest-grab for the final climb. And we knew he lived! Wild.
December 12, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Going to see "Return of the King" on opening day and nearly being late because the cinema was showing it in every theatre. No parking. Every street full of bumper-to-bumper traffic—all people trying to get close to the cinema. We parked very far away & had to RUN.
My poem "The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick." was published today in takahē magazine, and will be available both online and in print ❤️
The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick. - takahē
You were supposed to die quietly,politely walk off into the bush and vanish beneath the tōtara and tutu,never making anyone uncomfortable, so they will be mad at you for this: the darkly glittering br...
www.takahe.org.nz
December 12, 2025 at 9:35 PM
My poem "The best crystal for protecting against fascism is a brick." was published today in takahē magazine, and will be available both online and in print ❤️
I know that you want to be a serious writer, but have you tried giving 3 drops of blood to a rose bush at midnight during a waxing gibbous moon? Because, if not, maybe you're not serious serious.
December 12, 2025 at 11:35 AM
I know that you want to be a serious writer, but have you tried giving 3 drops of blood to a rose bush at midnight during a waxing gibbous moon? Because, if not, maybe you're not serious serious.
What's everyone reading at the moment? 📚
December 12, 2025 at 12:19 AM
What's everyone reading at the moment? 📚
I know, I know. Twinkies are terrible, but I live in New Zealand and had never had one. I instantly regretted it. But to be fair, my soul has been causing the devil problems for *decades*. If you get to hell and wonder why all the fluorescent lights are flickering, that's me, upset about the twinkie
Which font do I go with if I want everyone to know I am a communist faggot who sold his sold for a twinkie in February 1998?
Georgia? Sabon? Century Gothic?
Georgia? Sabon? Century Gothic?
December 11, 2025 at 11:27 PM
I know, I know. Twinkies are terrible, but I live in New Zealand and had never had one. I instantly regretted it. But to be fair, my soul has been causing the devil problems for *decades*. If you get to hell and wonder why all the fluorescent lights are flickering, that's me, upset about the twinkie
First, they came for the em dashes—now, they are coming for your Calibri.
December 11, 2025 at 11:16 PM
First, they came for the em dashes—now, they are coming for your Calibri.
I recently had a conversation with a coworker about reading. When I said I read mostly horror books, they got kind of snippy and replied that they only read "non-fiction" and more "wholesome books" that "improve the mind."
Gawd, book snobs are so fucking boring.
Gawd, book snobs are so fucking boring.
Book #83 - this book was kind of fucked up, but, like, in a good way. Is fungi horror a thing? I think it is. Well, it is now. This book was a real trip. Psychadelics. Hippie TERF cults. Woodland goddesses. Poison mushrooms. Cosmic horror. Madness. 4.5 🌟
December 10, 2025 at 9:16 PM
I recently had a conversation with a coworker about reading. When I said I read mostly horror books, they got kind of snippy and replied that they only read "non-fiction" and more "wholesome books" that "improve the mind."
Gawd, book snobs are so fucking boring.
Gawd, book snobs are so fucking boring.
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
“I brought this horrid creature into the world, and now I must take him out!” Winfrey said
Oprah Pursues Dr. Phil On Ship Through Arctic
THE ARCTIC CIRCLE—With a vow to destroy the abomination she had created if it was the last thing she ever did, television host Oprah Winfrey has spent weeks on a ship pursuing Dr. Phil through the Arc...
theonion.com
December 9, 2025 at 12:30 AM
“I brought this horrid creature into the world, and now I must take him out!” Winfrey said
What if instead of "hookup culture" we stare at each other yearningly from across opposite sides of the battlefield, one dead soldier for every love letter that we couldn't bring ourselves to send?
December 9, 2025 at 12:49 AM
What if instead of "hookup culture" we stare at each other yearningly from across opposite sides of the battlefield, one dead soldier for every love letter that we couldn't bring ourselves to send?
Two 5 star horror flicks that kept me entertained today during my convalescence. What hidden gems!! I needed something today to scratch the folk horror itch... 👻
December 8, 2025 at 9:09 AM
Two 5 star horror flicks that kept me entertained today during my convalescence. What hidden gems!! I needed something today to scratch the folk horror itch... 👻
Reducing a sauce on the stove, and have a few minutes, so ask me anything. Topics may include, but are not limited to, baking, demonology, online dating, tea leaves, and how to murder your husband.
a close up of a woman making a funny face
ALT: a close up of a woman making a funny face
media.tenor.com
October 17, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Reducing a sauce on the stove, and have a few minutes, so ask me anything. Topics may include, but are not limited to, baking, demonology, online dating, tea leaves, and how to murder your husband.
Reposted by Cottage in the Woods
It’s never too late to start over. Even if it feels far away, little steps forward matter. You haven’t missed your chance - even if it looks different from what you once wanted. You can still find love, happiness, fulfillment, purpose.
October 16, 2025 at 2:52 PM
It’s never too late to start over. Even if it feels far away, little steps forward matter. You haven’t missed your chance - even if it looks different from what you once wanted. You can still find love, happiness, fulfillment, purpose.
Days off are for baking, foraging wild herbs, cleaning linen, and dreaming of becoming a pirate 🥧 🌿
October 17, 2025 at 3:11 AM
Days off are for baking, foraging wild herbs, cleaning linen, and dreaming of becoming a pirate 🥧 🌿