Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

LightNews

Entertain Me

@banquette.bsky.social

440 followers 220 following 2.2K posts

NSFW Alt deviant milf account for kinky fun (fun for me, anyway. DGAF about you) 41 🔞 MDNI Neither selling nor buying. DMs open if we’ve flirted in comments

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 1h

I’m usually more a vodka girl but I’m starting to see the appeal of whiskey

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 2h

Ok no. You don’t get to say shit like I’m a-dorkable and then pull something like this. Nope. No no no.

But like, yay, obviously.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 2h

I don’t think I’ve ever seen more mushroomy-looking mushrooms in my life

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 4h

Well then I’m happy to help

a white alpaca is giving a thumbs up and saying `` don 't worry bae ... i got chew ''

Alt: a white alpaca is giving a thumbs up and saying `` don 't worry bae ... i got chew ''

media.tenor.com

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

To be clear- the swooning is for the full set of OED

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

The way I just swooned.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

Hm. I think it’s the languages. I suspect you’ve taken multiple, but at different levels of your education.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

The guy helping the elevator doors close has me 💀💀💀

Love it

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

I’m not polite, but hey.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

Lmao no need to tag. I’m just sharing the wealth xx

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

Feel better Ghostie xx

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 6h

You know I’m a ready and willing volunteer ✋🏻

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 8h

Killer. 😮‍💨

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 8h

I’m feeling pretty safe here 🫠

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 8h

Ok I’ve seen a lot of pictures of dicks and this is legit top 10%. Maybe 5%.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 10h

A little vampire squid guy, a shark, and a jellyfish are talking. Vampire squid guy says “I once saw a human and peed myself” and the shark responds “A human saw me, and he peed himself.” The jellyfish goes “A human touched me once, and his friend led on him,” to which the squid guy and shark go “dude…” “what?”

Dr. Pepper is the name of the person who created it. What you’re actually drinking is Dr. Pepper’s monster.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 10h

Welcome to my rant, Whisp.

Oh! I found some memes for you. One moment.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 10h

Unless you were trying to spare me the indignity that is the incongruity of the switchblade sometimes being a side-open and sometimes being out the front, which I appreciate, but as an aggregate I can absolutely forgive that. Not you, though. I don’t forgive you.

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 10h

You all are on my shitlist. Every one of you who has recommended horror movies to me, knowing my knife kink, love of Tool, and general aesthetic- why tf wasn’t Hellraiser at the top of your list for me?? This movie is everything. I’d give it 5 stars but Babadook exists, so it gets 4.5.

a man with spikes on his head is standing in front of a window and says the box you opened it we came

Alt: a man with spikes on his head is standing in front of a window and says the box you opened it we came

media.tenor.com

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 12h

Looking for a woodie?

Old station wagon with wood trim

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 14h

Fishnets and nothing else? What’s not to like?

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 14h

Love this 🫠

You’ve been begging to submit, though- and would you really have hesitated if I asked? Nice try, Georgie xx

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 14h

I wonder sometimes if you don’t turn me into a puddle for just that purpose

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 14h

And that just makes the melting worse 🫠🫠🫠

Entertain Me @banquette.bsky.social · 15h

Take a bite Voo xx