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TeenagePhlebotomy

@teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social

4.1K followers 3.3K following 12K posts

My neighbor had chickens in his unfenced yard and they shit all over my lawn and patio but now they're dead. I had nothing to do with it.

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Reposted by TeenagePhlebotomy

wargen @funeralpig.bsky.social · 8h

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. One for practice and the other one is the "main" grave.

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TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 1h

Thanky!

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 1h

So it's pudding not poontang?

This explains a great deal.

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 1h

This is important in ways I don't yet understand.

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Reposted by TeenagePhlebotomy

Lizzy @stonedeva.bsky.social · 3h

Irresistible if true, dillweed

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TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 2h

Thank you! That's nice to hear!

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 2h

I got ALL that shit in between losing my job and the expiration of the company insurance. Then ACA stuff (which was covered by the about to expire tax credit). Now either Medicaid or Medicare (I forget which one). Soon, I will have insurance through my new grocery store job.

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TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 3h

Thank you! Hasn't been this long since 1994.

I am old. Which you could probably pick up from the photo.

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 3h

Oh, shut the fuck up you undercooked bald and bearded fetus.

Ross Douthat opines thusly in the NYT: "The Pope Needs to Be More Specific"

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 3h

[doffs cap (which is now on my head again after taking the photo hatless) at you in an appreciative manner]

TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 3h

I'll keep that in mind for when I break the ones that are coming to replace the progressives!

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TeenagePhlebotomy @teenagephlebotomy.bsky.social · 3h

It's fuckin' perfect when it rains. That shit ain't touch us. Also, we have a nice li'l heater. I only leave the patio to do my dirty, sinful toilet business.