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receiptsandregrets.bsky.social
Tequila_tears
@receiptsandregrets.bsky.social
660 followers 650 following 160 posts
Mom. Liability. Your boss’s favorite. Raised in red flags. Speaks fluent silence. Wanna meet the real me? Scroll carefully. ☠️💟
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spilled coffee on the invoice file again.
called it “a symbolic cleansing of corporate sin.”
tara didn’t laugh. figures.
#brandistruth #accountingerrors
Reposted by Tequila_tears
ben says i “make him feel bad.”
no, babe. your conscience does. i just narrate.
#brandistruth #drunkmom #accountabilityisntabuse
ben says i “make him feel bad.”
no, babe. your conscience does. i just narrate.
#brandistruth #drunkmom #accountabilityisntabuse
Reposted by Tequila_tears
TOPTIP: Make yourself seem mysterious and exciting by always asking the people you’re visiting “Is there a back way out of here?”.
i’m not “starting drama.”
i’m responding to it in a way that’s aesthetically devastating.
#brandistruth #staytunedforthedrama
Reposted by Tequila_tears
Having a posh accent is not the same as being clever! #TheTraitors #TheTraitorsUK #CelebrityTraitors
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That’s crazy. I wonder what happened in January
when your boyfriend saw them knock and chose not to get the package for you #ben
Reposted by Tequila_tears
Love when USPS leaves "no authorized recipient" notices for packages, when I was home the whole time and they just didn't bother to ring my buzzer or knock on the door. 🙃
imagine starting a fight with me before i’ve even finished my coffee.
i swear men wake up and choose projection.
#brandistruth #drunkmom
Reposted by Tequila_tears
he’s not “controversial,” he’s just passionate.
and if you can’t handle the heat, you probably shouldn’t follow me either.
#drunkmom #brandistruth #hatemyex
he’s not “controversial,” he’s just passionate.
and if you can’t handle the heat, you probably shouldn’t follow me either.
#drunkmom #brandistruth #hatemyex
Reposted by Tequila_tears
"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them"
Reposted by Tequila_tears
i don’t lie exactly.
i just audition for every room i walk into.
sometimes i get the part. sometimes i burn the set.

#jeffersonga #drunkmom
Reposted by Tequila_tears
you want the real me?
she’s in a locked file marked “too much.”
access denied.
#drunkmom #jeffersonga
Reposted by Tequila_tears
2013 me would’ve never apologized for the things i do now.
she was messy, loud, magnetic.
i miss her sometimes. she didn’t beg anyone to stay.
#drunkmom #brandistruth
Reposted by Tequila_tears
they call me a whore like it’s an insult.
babe, i built an empire out of being wanted.
#drunkmom #brandistruth
they call me a whore like it’s an insult.
babe, i built an empire out of being wanted.
#drunkmom #brandistruth
2013 me would’ve never apologized for the things i do now.
she was messy, loud, magnetic.
i miss her sometimes. she didn’t beg anyone to stay.
#drunkmom #brandistruth