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Dan of Green Gables

@kozuh.bsky.social

630 followers 300 following 35 posts

Writer at The Hard Times, Infinite World Magazine, McSweeneys, and others. Author LINGERIA novel and Garages & Grievances TTRPG; CHI ➡️ ATL ➡️ ITH

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 40m

I am not really much of a video game player, it takes a lot for me to get into a game but when I do find one I like I become OBSESSED.

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 17h

Every time you go to a college town some alumni is like “Oh dude, you gotta go to Clunky Brutus’ and get their Beef Bucket,” and it’ll be the worst thing you’ve ever eaten.

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Reposted by Dan of Green Gables

Joshua J. Friedman @joshuajfriedman.com · 23h

Mamdani: "But there is one thing that I will change: I will no longer look for myself in the shadows. I will find myself in the light."

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 1d

I should always look at the replies before I run to photoshop.

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 1d

I keep a screenshot of Spotify on hand in case anyone at work looks at my screen. #heavymeal

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 1d

The wings aren't that spicy...

Smoke & Mirrors @gonzoabsurdist.bsky.social · 1d

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 1d

Missed Rocketeer Day this year!
I hope you all celebrated by punching a Nazi.

Reposted by Dan of Green Gables

jeremy kaplowitz @jeremykaplowitz.com · 1d

i was able to make this without AI

jeremy kaplowitz @jeremykaplowitz.com · Aug 9

you have my vote, Andrew Cuomo!

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 1d

Lie. Look at the disgusting, malformed hands.

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

WIFE: Dan, did you spend fifteen grand on a literal extra from Emmet Otter’s Jug Band Christmas?!

ME: Babe, that’s our retirement Muppet.

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Good thing I have no social skills to fall back on that would allow for networking opportunities.

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Farscape (1999-2003)

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

ME: Look, I walked into a tattoo shop and pointed at a cool snake. I didn’t realize what its significance was or its offensive historical context.

REPORTER: Sir, it’s the Pokémon Arbok.

ME: I WAS RAISED IN A DIGIMON HOUSEHOLD! I DIDN’T KNOW!

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Unfortunately I wasn’t gifted with very good hand-eye coordination, luckily I’m also not very smart.

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Samwise & I

Reposted by Dan of Green Gables

Mike Schuster @mcs212.bsky.social · 2d

May I offer you a variety of tea, each more expired than the last

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults—Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe—living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Drop an old person you're going to turn into in the future

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Aren’t there specific bars for wild, polite, lonely bears to meet up?

Matt Novak @paleofuture.bsky.social · 3d

“A wild, very ‘polite’ and possibly lonely black bear recently paid a visit to its neighbors at a Northern California zoo.”

Los Angeles Times @latimes.com · 3d

Wild bear stealthily enters California zoo, is found visiting the bear exhibit

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 2d

Remember when Obama put his feet up on the resolute desk and the right lost their mind because he was disrespecting the history of the White House? Not sure why I’m thinking about that today.

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 3d

Tinker Bell is described as embonpoint, which I had a to look up and is French for thicc. She is so thirsty for Peter she tries to kill Wendy. Also... "unsteady fairies had to climb over Peter on their way home from an orgy."

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 3d

Two books I just read that are much more horny than I expected: Peter Pan and Anne Frank's The Diary of a Young Girl #BookSky

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Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 3d

He moved to America to escape this nickname.

Iron Chef Bot @ironchefbot.bsky.social · 4d

Frame #22950 from S03 -E14 - Battle of the Pike Conger-627684

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 3d

Foolow me on Letterboxd for more financial tips for the undead. boxd.it/brc3mT

A ★★ review of Salem's Lot (1979)

Why are vampires so obsessed with real estate? Oh right, it’s a long term investment strategy. Makes sense.

boxd.it

Dan of Green Gables @kozuh.bsky.social · 4d

Goodwill should do their own version of The Criterion Closet with their DVD bin and make celebrities choose between multiple copies of Hancock, God’s Not Dead, and How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days.