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Balderdash

@balderdash.bsky.social

4.5K followers 660 following 5.4K posts

I placed my onions on the floor, under the window by the door. The layers of nuance caught their eyes, the day I won The Turner Prize

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · Oct 11

12 year old daughter told me she has her first boyfriend “accidentally as we don’t really know each other.” I said ‘ha, just like me and your mother.’ No-one laughed. Atmosphere remains frosty at best.
#diary

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 38m

Fucking unbelievable

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 38m

‘VERY POOR INDEED.’

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 39m

My response when my wife asks me what last-minute preparations need to be made for my 50th birthday party.

‘More rice, bigger chairs and reinforced toilets.’ Headline for imminent sumo basho in London.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 1h

I did. Experienced something very similar in China.

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 2h

Alright 10cc

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 2h

England 57-6 - unbelievably poor shot selection. Both Pakistan’s opening bowlers swing & seam the ball in yet Jones S-B & Beaumont all bowled on the inside - two of them to bizarre expansive shots. Lamb bowled playing back for some reason & the least said about Dunkley’s choice of shot the better.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 3h

England 22-2 off 2.2. Benaudtastic.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 1d

India sweating. Probably between them and NZ for the 4th place

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 2d

* Simon Schama voiceover

‘Britain in all her majesty. Land of Shakespeare, Lord Byron, Isaac Newton and scousers dressed as babies shouting ‘Mad, Yank slut.’

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Reposted by Balderdash

Rick Burin @rickburin.bsky.social · 2d

What makes you proud to be British? For me, this is right up there.

A one-star review from a Texan tourist visiting Liverpool:

freddytexan (16 reviews)
“My wife and I visted Liverpool for our 30th wedding anniversary from Texas. Our evening was ruined when a man dressed as an adult baby called my wife a "Mad yank slut" because she'd never heard of a band called Steps.”

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 3d

Morning Julian. Weren’t they amazing? What a performance.

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 3d

Fair enough - I have seen it live and you’re right.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 3d

Rugby League final about to start. The only sport where a player can get decapitated, seen back together, pass the concussion test and return to the field where the offending player is given the benefit of the doubt and let off with a warning.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 3d

Disappointed that after badmouthing every minority group I can think of, siding with dictators and sending in troops to cities in my own country, I haven’t won the Nobel Peace Prize.

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Reposted by Balderdash

Julie Irwin @jdirwinbooks.bsky.social · 4d

The inventor of the snooze alarm has died. He'll be buried next Thursday at 10.15, 10.20 and 10.25.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 4d

Born on this day 1937: World Cup winner and Manchester United legend, Bobby Charlton.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 5d

Yes - Ive had this recommended before. Cheers.

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 5d

Well, Traitors was already a great show but these contestants are so good, so funny (and generally so nice) the show has gone up another notch. Magnificent tv.

Reposted by Balderdash

Phil Harrison @mrpmharrison.bsky.social · 5d

Genuinely spent all day looking forward to seeing Alan Carr touching someone's face.
#CelebrityTraitors

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 5d

What an amazing innings from Nadene de Klerk - 84 off 54 to win the game v India.

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 5d

Luke Shaw and Robbie Savage relaxing before England versus Wales.

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 6d

Watching Charlotte Church digging in that grave in a floaty dress is the best tv of 2025.

Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 7d

Blimey Australia 76-7 v Pakistan and Gardner out. Current mood…

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Balderdash @balderdash.bsky.social · 7d

‘DON’T FORGET THE SAUSAGES!’*

*Michael Caine voice.

Reposted by Balderdash

Liam Hogan @liamhogan.id.au · 7d

One of the conspirators who helped Gavrilo Princip shoot Archduke Franz Ferdinand survived to see the breakup of Yugoslavia. He could conceivably have watched the Neighbours episode where Scott and Charlene got married

rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 7d

you ever think about those real weird overlaps. like tennessee williams might have listened to the ramones

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