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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew

@amandasmith.bsky.social

16K followers 720 following 44K posts

Writer, science nerd, boy crazy, Dodger fan. she/her. I made a book & won best dramatic screenplay at #AFF2021. Opinions my own & often wrong.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Nov 20

Please don’t mistake declarative statements for expertise, I’m just medically incapable of speaking without unfounded confidence.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 46m

This feels anti-Irish

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 55m

Thank you! I don’t always live up to it but it’s a pretty good phrase to bully myself with sometimes.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 4h

“My presence is an endorsement” is why I left Twitter and my synagogue and both times it was the right choice.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 2h

“The Gang Carries a Corpse Up A Mountain” is my second favorite Martin McDonagh play

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Mel Buer @melbuer.bsky.social · 3h

The biggest lesson I’ve learned from my time in the labor movement is this: solidarity is a *verb*—and that action takes many forms. Can’t hit the picket line? Pick up the phone and get a member off the couch. Can’t make the time to phone tree but have a half hour on the weekend? Help make signs.

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Barred and Boujee aka Madiba Dennie @audrelawdamercy.bsky.social · 3h

‼️ this is one of the reasons why the Musk shutdown of USAID broke me, like

Congress said 'we're allocating these funds to save lives'

a random asshole with too much money and unresolved bitterness about the end of Apartheid said 'no you're not'

so the funding disappeared??

and people are dying??

Hunter @hunterub.bsky.social · 6h

There's literally no reason for Congress to exist if any random freak in the presidential orbit can nullify laws and seize federal funds. All of this is plainly illegal, but Mike Johnson leads the most corrupt Congress in US history (and by a wide margin.)

Reuters @reuters.com · 11h

White House budget director Vought plans to shut down CFPB within months, says it's no longer protecting consumers reut.rs/4qjMIyT

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 3h

“I bet The Bear burns his arm on toaster ovens a lot too” I say to myself reassuringly as I run my forearm under the faucet.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 4h

“My presence is an endorsement” is why I left Twitter and my synagogue and both times it was the right choice.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 5h

“My presence is an endorsement” has become one of my basic moral guides and you’re all welcome to borrow it

Gravel Influencer @gravelinfluencer.bsky.social · 6h

The Vermont state senator in the Hitler chat group is playing the, "I am but an innocent smol bean" card.

Samuel Douglass hasn't decided yet if he'll resign: www.vermontpublic.org/local-news/2...

“My role in the group chat in question was a procedural one about bylaws and floor strategy. There were often periods of multiple days when I didn't check this group chat and I was unfortunately unaware of those comments,” Douglass said in a written statement sent to Vermont Public Wednesday afternoon. “I should've been more vigilant, more careful, and less naive about who I associate with and my digital environments.”

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 5h

I mean it can’t be any more difficult than typing out a post though right

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 6h

I wish @artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social loved accessibility as much as they love comparing football players to neoclassical art (and I mean that as a compliment)

bsky.app/profile/base...

Claire @baseball-broad.bsky.social · 8h

I wish @artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social would use alt text! Sigh.

Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 6h

Great point, @thetnholler.bsky.social what’s up with not using alt text?

bsky.app/profile/seed...

Loser That Eats Vegetables @seedysong.bsky.social · 6h

The Tennessee holler!

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Claire @baseball-broad.bsky.social · 8h

I wish @artbutmakeitsports.bsky.social would use alt text! Sigh.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 8h

Ooooh that is a good one yes

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 10h

What big account refusing to use alt text are you most disappointed by?

For me it’s @depthsofwikipedia.bsky.social, because she could often just copy and paste the text on the screenshot.

Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Oct 17

This just started getting a bunch of reskeets which is always a sign that a new influx of furries have arrived from Twitter. Welcome to our rehomed wildlife, remember the basic rules: always use alt text and block early and often

Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Feb 8

As someone raised in the fires of early 00s forums, seeing furry art in feeds where I least expect it is like seeing wolves thriving in Yellowstone again. A healthy furry population is the sign of effective rewilding efforts.

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Bobby Kogan @bbkogan.bsky.social · 10h

Under the Constitution and under the ADA, it is illegal to spend money without funding for that purpose. The president may not spend money to do something unless there's actually money to carry it out and that action is expressly allowed.

https://constitution.congress.gov/browse/essay/artI-S9-C7-1/ALDE_00001095/

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 9h

Thanks! I found it helpful to turn on the “require alt text” function in settings so I don’t forget!

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Jan 6

“Bruh I never even thought of this. What if the sun’s all hot because it’s looking super close to try to watch the game but then we shut the roof and it’s all sad it can’t watch?”

~Deep Thoughts with Cody Bellinger~

Tweet from Michael Young: As we close The Ballpark, I feel the Sun is getting disrespected.
Sun, I got u. Thanks for your
dependability, energy, and your gift of fusing hydrogen into helium. My role as family man is big, but I've found my calling (swamp ass advocate) cuz of u.
Mighty Star, I salute u.

Photo of Cody looking contemplative in the dugout with a bat on his shoulder

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Jan 14

“At first I was like, ‘How does Toomgis wash his hands if his fingers are made of hot dogs?’ because like the hot water would cook them, right?

Then I was like, ‘oh, that’s what they’re doing with all the Dodger Dogs no one’s eating.’”

~Deep Thoughts with Cody Bellinger~

Three screenshots from backstage dodgers of Cody answering a question but he is, inexplicably, wearing his hoodie up even though he’s inside, so he kind of looks like a little kid pretending to be an old woman.

The “hot dogs no one’s eating” was a reference to Covid shutting down the baseball season

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Jul 4

Imagine posting images on a text based app and finding it too inconvenient to write more text, couldn’t be me 💅🏻

(And no, the “training ai” thing is bullshit, ai is trained on your skeets too and that hasn’t stopped you from posting)

Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Jul 4

“Look, Belli’s going to tell you that the reason Toomgis can’t leave the AMPM is because he uses the hot dog rollers to keep his fingers fresh. And sure, it’s gonna ruin hot dogs for you, but ... he might have a point.”

~Deep Thoughts with Chris Taylor~

Photo of Chris Taylor and Mookie Betts in the dugout in mid conversation. Mookies back is to us but his right arm is kind of curling toward his body, as if he’s reacting to whatever Chris is saying. Chris is standing in a very active pose angled toward Mookie, gesturing with his left arm, like he’s stating a basic but unappealing fact.

how does one describe Toomgis the ampm snack giant, ampm being a regional gas station chain? His entire body is composed entirely of snacks, his voice is a low growl, and he has a pet beaver. He both is made of and also consumes snacks. Here’s the breakdown from a one sheet I found on the internet:

Toomgis won't bite. But with a 7-foot, 6-inch body made of snacks, you might.

<text for Toomgis’ hair, which is made of red vines, and upon closer inspection eyebrows of those weird chocolate licorice sticks> A flowing mane of licorice hair. Women love him. Guys want to eat him.

<text for cheeseburger nose, no explanation given for what the skin on his forehead or eyelids are made of, although he does have a row of chocolate chip cookies below his nose creating cheeks> Although his cheeseburger nose looks delicious, try not to stare. Toomgis loves meaningful conversations and strong eye contact.

<text for a lush beard of Cheetos> Some guys worry about getting food in their
beard. Toomgis' beard is made completely of cheese curls. Take that, hipsters!

<text for arms, jointlessly connecting at the mouth of the cup with toomgis’s shoulder and at the narrow end with his wrist>Thirst Oasis cups on the right. High Voltage coffee cups on the left.
Good thing Toomgis is ambidextrous.

<text for hands made of cinammon roll palms and long skinny hot dog fingers>Thanks to his hot dog fingers, Toomgis had to give up his dreams of ecoming a hand model..
But that's okay, because they're delicious.

<text for body, barrel shaped and composed of chip bags with a skirt or fringe of potato chips like artichoke leaves. His legs are each two hot dogs with a cinnamon roll in the middle and then soda can ankle joints>Toomgis loves hugs.But it's hard to get your arms around him with all the chips, pretzels, donuts, hot dogs, energy drinks.

<text for feet made of wrapped candy bars>People worship at the feet of Toomgis...so they can get a bite of his chocolate bar toes.

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · Aug 13

We are on a text-based app; there is virtually no excuse for not adding additional text for accessibility

Kari Dru @karidru.bsky.social · Aug 13

"Glad we're all getting paid to do this" in response to my alt text post suggesting you CUT AND PASTE THE GODDAMN TEXT IN YOUR SCREENGRAB.

Fuck off into the fucking sun.

Making sure everyone knows what the heck is going on isn't worth less than five seconds of effort to you?

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LOWρUF🐸 🇵🇦🇬🇱🇨🇦🇲🇽 @lowrhoufo.bsky.social · 10h

I feel like Ben Gvir personally being in the room when Greta Thunberg was being tortured should be bigger news

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 10h

Congratulations!!

Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 10h

Tag and shame!

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Rick Caruso’s Private Fire Crew @amandasmith.bsky.social · 10h

God yes

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