Jeff Churchwell
@theempath.bsky.social
In the time it takes you to read this profile, I already will have forgotten what I wrote.
Illegitimi non Carborundum. Songwriter-in-residence at Chez Hades. Dog lover. Liberal AF. I do not automatically follow back. No DMs please. 🇺🇦🇨🇦🇲🇽🇪🇺🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
Illegitimi non Carborundum. Songwriter-in-residence at Chez Hades. Dog lover. Liberal AF. I do not automatically follow back. No DMs please. 🇺🇦🇨🇦🇲🇽🇪🇺🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
Puerto Rico has entered the chat.
December 2, 2025 at 11:33 PM
Puerto Rico has entered the chat.
Simple question: how many “preventative” MRIs did President Biden (5 years older) have while in office?
December 2, 2025 at 1:38 PM
Simple question: how many “preventative” MRIs did President Biden (5 years older) have while in office?
I’m pretty sure being able to finish a quoted line in a Hank Williams song is part of the Citizenship test.
December 2, 2025 at 9:01 AM
I’m pretty sure being able to finish a quoted line in a Hank Williams song is part of the Citizenship test.
He’s likely to learn in prison.
December 2, 2025 at 8:52 AM
He’s likely to learn in prison.
I have this lovely bridge in Brooklyn for sale.
December 2, 2025 at 8:40 AM
I have this lovely bridge in Brooklyn for sale.
Jeffries absolutely cannot be handed the Speaker’s Gavel if/when the House flips.
December 2, 2025 at 8:39 AM
Jeffries absolutely cannot be handed the Speaker’s Gavel if/when the House flips.
Pacific Princess. Go episodic.
December 2, 2025 at 7:50 AM
Pacific Princess. Go episodic.
Level up. Half-gallons are where it’s at.
December 2, 2025 at 6:35 AM
Level up. Half-gallons are where it’s at.
So, the Ocarina of Time, yes?
December 2, 2025 at 6:13 AM
So, the Ocarina of Time, yes?
Well, you know, to be fair to Elon (not a thing I’m proud of), the Segway was touted as the transportation of tomorrow (along with the monorail, of course). The difference is that I’d still like to own a Segway.
December 2, 2025 at 5:54 AM
Well, you know, to be fair to Elon (not a thing I’m proud of), the Segway was touted as the transportation of tomorrow (along with the monorail, of course). The difference is that I’d still like to own a Segway.
Ah, I thought you meant Pizza.
December 2, 2025 at 5:49 AM
Ah, I thought you meant Pizza.
Only decent invention in 5000 years of recorded history.
December 2, 2025 at 5:49 AM
Only decent invention in 5000 years of recorded history.
I love Vicki to death. But this song was an abomination. I so glad this doesn’t define her legacy.
December 2, 2025 at 2:02 AM
I love Vicki to death. But this song was an abomination. I so glad this doesn’t define her legacy.
You can put cheese on or in anything. Including other cheese. Live large.
December 2, 2025 at 1:39 AM
You can put cheese on or in anything. Including other cheese. Live large.
How about the Tri-State Area?
a cartoon of a man covering his face with his hands
Alt: a cartoon of Dr Heinz Doofenshmirtz covering his face with his hands.
media.tenor.com
December 2, 2025 at 12:19 AM
How about the Tri-State Area?
eh... just post it five times.
December 1, 2025 at 6:40 AM
eh... just post it five times.
Got to experience that first-hand a few years back. Zurich knows how to Christmas.
December 1, 2025 at 1:25 AM
Got to experience that first-hand a few years back. Zurich knows how to Christmas.
Excellent. May I never see his name in a BlueSky post again.
December 1, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Excellent. May I never see his name in a BlueSky post again.
If I’m going to be where an In-N-Out is for more than a day, I usually will pop in for a Double Double. I treat the fries as ballast. They keep me from ordering a second Double Double. Besides, ketchup will mostly cover the disappointment.
November 30, 2025 at 8:28 PM
If I’m going to be where an In-N-Out is for more than a day, I usually will pop in for a Double Double. I treat the fries as ballast. They keep me from ordering a second Double Double. Besides, ketchup will mostly cover the disappointment.
This one (Northwestern’s cave, not you) pissed me off the most. It’s in my backyard, my son did his undergrad there, and NU is supposed to be better than this. Appeasement and susceptibility to extortion may get you temporary relief, but you’ll never get over having been bought.
November 30, 2025 at 3:44 PM
This one (Northwestern’s cave, not you) pissed me off the most. It’s in my backyard, my son did his undergrad there, and NU is supposed to be better than this. Appeasement and susceptibility to extortion may get you temporary relief, but you’ll never get over having been bought.
How strong could it be if it ended up on your table? 🤔
November 30, 2025 at 10:01 AM
How strong could it be if it ended up on your table? 🤔