Emergency meeting of EU Member States representatives 5pm today, to discuss relations with the US

I assume they’re all narrated by Brian Blessed.

There is a new autistic barbie out, but no one is talking about her mother, undiagnosed computer engineer barbie about to get the surprise of her life when she starts to argue with the evaluator that these are all normal childhood behaviours that she had when she was the same age.

This is nice but I feel they’ve missed a trick by not including a cord in her back that you can pull to make her say “Twisted flax please, Victoria”

Every newly hobbiless Eurovision fan is obligated to select one of the Critically Endangered Crafts as their new hyper-fixation

A theremin!

Ah, the Swiss delegation has spent five years fretting that another country will set their artist on fire so they constructed the interval to retroactively stake their claim. #Eurovision