Only a native English-speaking 'Murican afflicted with an amalgamation of Dunning-Kruger effect, excellent student syndrome, and main character syndrome could produce a grammatically correct sentence such as this:

"We at [redacted] received this email not sure that we were supposes to get it."

Leaving a bookstore with your arms full of books has big "look at these cool rocks I found" energy

Your egg prices hasn't gone down one red cent.

#ThemeMusic
youtu.be/X2WH8mHJnhM?...

"Does your dog bite?"

"No, it's worse... she judges"

My workplace received a huge donation of books from someone's estate. An old newspaper clipping was found tucked inside one of the cookbooks. If you ever wanted to know the secret to giving an apple pie some oomph, here you go...

Don't tell Uncle Roger that rice can be cooked in about 10 minutes with the boil and drain method.

Because why wait 30 minutes with the old regular rice cooker when you can cook it like pasta?

www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5ln...

The most beautiful adventures are not those we go to seek.

- message from a fortune cookie

Ladies, want to save money on hair care? Shave your head bald. You’ll wont need salon visits or buy shampoo again. Follow me on Fartbook for more $$$ saving tips.

Nutrition fact:
If you drink a gallon of water per day, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy peeing. Stay hydrated my friends.

Sums up the current state of the US politics

First post. ohai. I iz refugee from bird app.