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retsoor.bsky.social
Retsoor
@retsoor.bsky.social
Tremendous savings: https://linktr.ee/retsoor
*throws fitbit in your coffin*
November 17, 2025 at 5:17 AM
trebek: what it is

contestant: what is it
November 17, 2025 at 5:15 AM
a drug that makes you feel like you're wearing a hat
November 17, 2025 at 4:20 AM
[taxidermist holding in a bong hit] cute dog
November 17, 2025 at 3:09 AM
sorry I told your teen that life “low key gores you”
November 16, 2025 at 4:51 AM
yeah sex is great but in terms of sin despair is the greatest
November 15, 2025 at 7:41 AM
the entire military industrial complex hooked up to a single power strip
November 15, 2025 at 7:36 AM
the fonz jumping over the moon
November 15, 2025 at 5:42 AM
*plugs phone into the moon*
November 15, 2025 at 5:41 AM
*whispers “whispers during sex” during sex*
November 14, 2025 at 8:30 PM
sure sex is great but can you even comprehend greatness
November 14, 2025 at 8:29 PM
*plugs phone into the moon*
November 14, 2025 at 5:27 AM
the calls are coming from inside the jerk store
November 12, 2025 at 7:54 PM
are you there god? it's me, the jerk store
November 12, 2025 at 7:53 PM
trebek: this mysterious business can never seem to keep you in stock

contestant: what is the jerk store
November 12, 2025 at 7:52 PM
what do we want?

to be free of desire

when do we want it?

*confused murmuring*
November 12, 2025 at 4:05 AM
what do we want? time travel when do we want it? *confused murmuring*
November 12, 2025 at 2:12 AM
pro tip: burn the land around the bridges too
November 12, 2025 at 12:18 AM
honk if every time there is a day & every day there is a time
November 11, 2025 at 5:00 AM
pulling a lazy boy back forever but only the feeling
November 11, 2025 at 1:48 AM
you: [anxious] hi

them: [confident, everything in its right place, well parented, balanced worldview, genetically tip top, groomed, nutrient dense, hydrated, civic minded, spiritually connected to a community that fosters security & a general sense of purpose] hey
November 10, 2025 at 10:18 PM
nice suffering, sure would be a shame if someone recontextualized it
November 10, 2025 at 5:09 AM
what do we want? mutual coital timing when do we want it? wait not yet
November 10, 2025 at 2:15 AM
yeah sex is great but have you ever thought the same 5 things over & over for 80 yrs
November 10, 2025 at 1:55 AM
sorry I added “it is what it is” to your eulogy
November 10, 2025 at 1:36 AM