Patrick Fitzgerald
@patmfitz.bsky.social
Politics and parody. Writer of funny song lyrics and parody songs on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@patmfitz
🚫DMs 🚫Crypto 🚫MAGA
🚫DMs 🚫Crypto 🚫MAGA
Pinned
It's Beginning To Look Like Trump's Last Christmas (song parody)
YouTube video by Patrick Fitzgerald
youtu.be
Starting on this year's sing-along Christmas carols:
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
My daughter was an extra on Stranger Things S2. On the left with ponytails.
December 3, 2025 at 5:10 AM
My daughter was an extra on Stranger Things S2. On the left with ponytails.
If you wrote this cabinet meeting as a scene in a screenplay, you would be laughed out of your pitch meeting. Nobody could be that sycophantic.
Noem: You made it through the hurricane season without a hurricane—you kept the hurricanes away. We appreciate that.
December 3, 2025 at 4:34 AM
If you wrote this cabinet meeting as a scene in a screenplay, you would be laughed out of your pitch meeting. Nobody could be that sycophantic.
Sleep soundly, Don
And think about your better times
Before you blew up all those boats
And did war crimes
And think about your better times
Before you blew up all those boats
And did war crimes
December 3, 2025 at 1:40 AM
Sleep soundly, Don
And think about your better times
Before you blew up all those boats
And did war crimes
And think about your better times
Before you blew up all those boats
And did war crimes
Being drunk does not count as “the fog of war”, Pete.
Pete Hegseth invokes ‘fog of war’ as backlash grows over strikes on boats-FT
December 3, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Being drunk does not count as “the fog of war”, Pete.
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
The power of the Sharpie.
Kristi Noem: "Sir, you made it through hurricane season without a hurricane. You kept the hurricanes away. We appreciate that."
December 2, 2025 at 10:04 PM
The power of the Sharpie.
Starting on this year's sing-along Christmas carols:
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
It's Beginning To Look Like Trump's Last Christmas (song parody)
YouTube video by Patrick Fitzgerald
youtu.be
December 2, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Starting on this year's sing-along Christmas carols:
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
It’s beginning to look like Trump’s last Christmas
Won’t make it through the year
As his ankles begin to swell
It’s affecting his heart as well
He can’t regenerate that like his ear
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
The Pentagon reporters who have been kicked out of the building continue to break huge stories every day while the right-wing New Media continue to post selfies of themselves hanging out in the Pentagon.
December 2, 2025 at 1:48 PM
The Pentagon reporters who have been kicked out of the building continue to break huge stories every day while the right-wing New Media continue to post selfies of themselves hanging out in the Pentagon.
You have to be standing by someone when you throw them in front of the bus.
Hegseth stands by 'American hero' admiral who issued second boat strike order
thehill.com
Hegseth stands by ‘American hero’ admiral who issued second boat strike order
twp.ai
December 2, 2025 at 1:25 AM
You have to be standing by someone when you throw them in front of the bus.
This has got to really burn for Georgia Republicans- who will they point to as “my African American” now that Ja’Quon is locked up?
Community notes don’t get much more brutal than this
December 1, 2025 at 9:01 AM
This has got to really burn for Georgia Republicans- who will they point to as “my African American” now that Ja’Quon is locked up?
As we say in the South: Oh, bless her heart.
December 1, 2025 at 6:29 AM
As we say in the South: Oh, bless her heart.
If the economy was important enough to sacrifice grandma during the pandemic, upgrading your phone isn’t much in comparison.
Americans are holding onto devices longer than ever and it's costing the economy
Americans are holding onto devices longer than ever before, and while it may be consumer smart, it comes at a cost to work productivity and the U.S. economy.
www.cnbc.com
November 30, 2025 at 6:40 AM
If the economy was important enough to sacrifice grandma during the pandemic, upgrading your phone isn’t much in comparison.
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
Pete Hegseth
in the Pardon Room
with the Autopen
in the Pardon Room
with the Autopen
November 30, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Pete Hegseth
in the Pardon Room
with the Autopen
in the Pardon Room
with the Autopen
Leftovers are all gone - freshly made pasta fettuccine Alfredo, shrimp scampi, scallops, Brussels sprouts w/ dijon mustard brown sugar glaze, and homemade sourdough bread.
November 30, 2025 at 3:54 AM
Leftovers are all gone - freshly made pasta fettuccine Alfredo, shrimp scampi, scallops, Brussels sprouts w/ dijon mustard brown sugar glaze, and homemade sourdough bread.
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
Imagine posing for a photographer friend who sells your image to iStock and a year later, you see this is what The Washington Post has done with the image of you walking on a beautiful fall day
November 29, 2025 at 6:02 AM
Imagine posing for a photographer friend who sells your image to iStock and a year later, you see this is what The Washington Post has done with the image of you walking on a beautiful fall day
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
There are specific reasons Trumpists want war on Venezuela, but there‘s a generic one: they crave power to make war on anyone, any time, for completely fabricated reasons, and then to use the guise of war to increase violence and repression everywhere, including home.
They are lawless bestial scum.
They are lawless bestial scum.
November 29, 2025 at 6:28 PM
There are specific reasons Trumpists want war on Venezuela, but there‘s a generic one: they crave power to make war on anyone, any time, for completely fabricated reasons, and then to use the guise of war to increase violence and repression everywhere, including home.
They are lawless bestial scum.
They are lawless bestial scum.
“Leftover deviled eggs” is not a concept with which I am familiar.
November 29, 2025 at 6:27 PM
“Leftover deviled eggs” is not a concept with which I am familiar.
Kevin Hassett, with his smug self-satisfied smile, gets my vote as the most punchable face in the news. Wrote a song about it, like to hear it? Here is goes:
Smile (Kevin Hassett song parody)
YouTube video by Patrick Fitzgerald
youtu.be
November 28, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Kevin Hassett, with his smug self-satisfied smile, gets my vote as the most punchable face in the news. Wrote a song about it, like to hear it? Here is goes:
It’s Thanksgiving, Mariah is waking from hibernation
All I Want For Thanksgiving (Mariah Carey / "All I Want For Christmas Is You" song parody)
YouTube video by Patrick Fitzgerald
youtu.be
November 27, 2025 at 5:27 PM
It’s Thanksgiving, Mariah is waking from hibernation
It's Thanksgiving game day, let's do this. Go team!
November 27, 2025 at 3:48 PM
It's Thanksgiving game day, let's do this. Go team!
Dear Zillow: when you update home streetview photos, maybe don’t do it around Halloween.
November 26, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Dear Zillow: when you update home streetview photos, maybe don’t do it around Halloween.
Pumpkin pie (essential for Thanksgiving even though the rest of my menu is not the traditional turkey)
November 26, 2025 at 8:37 PM
Pumpkin pie (essential for Thanksgiving even though the rest of my menu is not the traditional turkey)
Reposted by Patrick Fitzgerald
The good news: the president has pardoned the turkey.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
November 25, 2025 at 1:38 PM
The good news: the president has pardoned the turkey.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
It’s a shame that they put the Epstein Files in front of so many eyes who can later be called to testify on the contents. 🤔
BREAKING: new emails CONFIRM my reporting that there are TRAINING VIDEOS instructing FBI personnel on how to review the Epstein Files. Plus, a lot more…
The emails reveal the special training given to FBI personnel working on what it called the “Epstein Transparency Project.” In some instances they referred to it as the “Special Redaction Project.” The training entailed PowerPoint slide presentations and video instruction on how to review the files.
November 26, 2025 at 12:35 AM
It’s a shame that they put the Epstein Files in front of so many eyes who can later be called to testify on the contents. 🤔
After several years of tweaking I have perfected my Thanksgiving dessert: layered cheesecake & flourless bittersweet chocolate cake. Cooked in jars in the sous vide. Topped with dark chocolate and caramel syrup
👨🍳 😘 🤌
👨🍳 😘 🤌
November 25, 2025 at 9:05 PM
After several years of tweaking I have perfected my Thanksgiving dessert: layered cheesecake & flourless bittersweet chocolate cake. Cooked in jars in the sous vide. Topped with dark chocolate and caramel syrup
👨🍳 😘 🤌
👨🍳 😘 🤌