Pants Optional
@pantsoptional.bsky.social
Irregular word-blatherer at goonhammer dot com, “responsible” for the Battle Bros column
But the baked ziti
November 5, 2025 at 2:34 AM
But the baked ziti
I’m suddenly very afraid of what happens if you turn on the AC
November 3, 2025 at 2:24 PM
I’m suddenly very afraid of what happens if you turn on the AC
Come to scenic [LOCATION WITHHELD], we have great amenities such as:
and:
and:
November 3, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Come to scenic [LOCATION WITHHELD], we have great amenities such as:
and:
and:
@rinric.bsky.social one step closer
October 27, 2025 at 11:09 PM
@rinric.bsky.social one step closer
also the doubles game with kassabian would be wild
October 27, 2025 at 3:54 AM
also the doubles game with kassabian would be wild
I’m guessing that if I make baked ziti within the next few weeks you kill me
October 23, 2025 at 5:59 PM
I’m guessing that if I make baked ziti within the next few weeks you kill me
Dracula could have sent a telegram to the Nintendo company expressing his opinions about Coca-Cola
October 7, 2025 at 11:56 PM
Dracula could have sent a telegram to the Nintendo company expressing his opinions about Coca-Cola
Yes it was. He just didn’t realize it.
October 6, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Yes it was. He just didn’t realize it.
Waking up this morning and thinking “oh good it’s super foggy and chilly” and then seeing the high. This is bullshit
October 6, 2025 at 1:54 PM
Waking up this morning and thinking “oh good it’s super foggy and chilly” and then seeing the high. This is bullshit
Hell, even on the East Coast it sucks for some things if you have to transfer some. Tried to go to a friend's wedding in Norfolk a few years ago and it would have taken as much time as driving and cost as much as flying.
October 6, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Hell, even on the East Coast it sucks for some things if you have to transfer some. Tried to go to a friend's wedding in Norfolk a few years ago and it would have taken as much time as driving and cost as much as flying.
If it works anything like garlic, wash your hands with a stainless steel spoon.
September 30, 2025 at 7:01 PM
If it works anything like garlic, wash your hands with a stainless steel spoon.
I dunno man there’s a lot of us Hammerin Goons on there
September 26, 2025 at 12:46 PM
I dunno man there’s a lot of us Hammerin Goons on there
It’s even dumber, the idea of the Rapture was invented maybe 200 years ago. It’s not even in the Bible unless you read 1 Thessalonians 4 a little weirdly.
September 23, 2025 at 2:25 PM
It’s even dumber, the idea of the Rapture was invented maybe 200 years ago. It’s not even in the Bible unless you read 1 Thessalonians 4 a little weirdly.
this is Correct
September 17, 2025 at 4:38 AM
this is Correct
The Nona the Ninth summary is probably “okay now _I_ have no idea what’s happening”
September 16, 2025 at 3:16 PM
The Nona the Ninth summary is probably “okay now _I_ have no idea what’s happening”
i can feel it
aching in my lower back
oh lord
aching in my lower back
oh lord
September 16, 2025 at 2:46 PM
i can feel it
aching in my lower back
oh lord
aching in my lower back
oh lord
No no I stake her rivals during the daytime
September 15, 2025 at 5:54 PM
No no I stake her rivals during the daytime
This just says to me you’re not employing your retainers properly
September 15, 2025 at 4:53 PM
This just says to me you’re not employing your retainers properly