Jennifer Dian
oldbat.bsky.social
Jennifer Dian
@oldbat.bsky.social
Shameless old baggage giving unsolicited advice who adores embarrassing the young.
Oh, that's a fish called a sarcastic fringehead in the photo.
Bertie Whitcomb pondered his wife's bosom.
"Perhaps I should re-engineer the stays for Whitcomb's Elevating Corset so that Emmeline doesn't look like an impending avalanche. She might quite appreciate being able to stand upright, too."
#GirlsOwnCC
November 23, 2025 at 7:10 PM
Colette chuckled to herself as she eavesdropped on the stranger telling Marie Curie that she belonged in the kitchen instead of playing scientist with the boys.
#GirlsOwnCC
November 23, 2025 at 6:50 PM
"Yes, Harold, the ladies' hats are much taller than ours, but ours have far more storage capacity. Lunch is literally on me today. Isn't it grand being a British man?"
#GirlsOwnCC
November 16, 2025 at 6:38 PM
"Maude, come over here! Look; this naked woman picnicking in the Monet bears an astounding resemblance to you! Why didn't you tell us you'd been to France? I would have asked you to bring back some lace."
#GirlsOwnCC
November 16, 2025 at 6:34 PM
"Look, Edmund! LOOK! I have five digits! FIVE!"
"My dear, don't overly excite yourself about being drawn with a normal hand. Look down at your foot."
#GirlsOwnCC
November 9, 2025 at 7:06 PM
"Oh, Edmund, won't you ever forgive me for giving birth to a cabbage?" #GirlsOwnCC
November 9, 2025 at 7:03 PM
Edward was so fascinated by the upward migration of the Widow Neely's nipples that he was oblivious to the fact that she'd found and was reading his diary of his adventures as a dancing boy in the Ottoman Empire.
#GirlsOwnCC
November 2, 2025 at 7:38 PM
"DON'T! Don't even think about it, Mr. Edmonds. That is exactly how Mr. Netherbitts lost his hand."
Nelly mused on the universal lack of respect for women reading a book. #GirlsOwnCC
November 2, 2025 at 7:34 PM
"I fear the Christmas season is nigh upon us, Gwendolyn!"
#GirlsOwnCC
October 26, 2025 at 6:37 PM
"Stay off'a my boat, missie! I can tell that's a fledgling albatross on your hat, and, for all I know, it's my mate Samuel who drowned last March in the Channel!"
#GirlsOwnCC
October 5, 2025 at 8:11 PM
"Emily, we all over indulged last night, but you can't attend church openly wearing an ice pack. Put it under a hat like the rest of us. Be sure to check for leaks first; the vicar thought Thomas was sweating with extreme guilt during the sermon last week."
#GirlsOwnCC
September 14, 2025 at 5:47 PM
"Emmie, don't move! Don't make a noise! There's a fox stole slinking through the brush and it's frothing at the mouth!"
"Don't be silly! That's just one of Daddy's mutant weasels; he's breeding them to keep the vermin down in government."
#GirlsOwnCC
August 24, 2025 at 6:45 PM
"Poor Papa," Emily sighed. "He still believes that young George is his marionette. It's costing me a fortune to pay George to play along with it, though, and truly mean of Edwin to pretend to cut his strings."
#GirlsOwnCC
August 17, 2025 at 6:48 PM
"Now, Sir Reginald, let the lad have his opinions. No matter how ludicrous the contention that Wisconsin artisanal cheeses can compete with Wensleydale and Cornish yarg, you have to admire the Yank's displaced patriotism." #GirlsOwnCC
August 17, 2025 at 6:45 PM
"The well is mostly dry, Missus, so your husband didn't drown, but he seems to be stuck so deep in the mud that we can't pull him out."
"How very tragic. I had hoped to buy that chic new mourning ensemble at Bon Marché. Now I'll have to toss down food every few days."
#GirlsOwnCC
August 10, 2025 at 6:02 PM
I'm so jealous!
We have opossums, though, and I've been feeding a group of young ones all summer. They've gotten more shy as the summer has worn on, but still come to the back door in the wee hours to look for grapes or cat food.
July 31, 2025 at 12:27 AM
"Please, Miss, I'm a starving former USAID worker, and even such a tiny bird could keep me going for a day or two!"
#GirlsOwnCC
July 27, 2025 at 5:55 PM
"THIS was in your room! It proves that you're not Mary, the sullen but talented cook, but the scandalous Countess Ada Lovelace! How dare you conceal yourself with our family and bring godless higher mathematics into our house!" #GirlsOwnCC
July 20, 2025 at 5:28 PM
"Richard, I just adore the gene-splicing kit you gave me for my birthday! I've been able to customize a pet that has the best attributes of a dog and a cat, with the judicious addition of some marsupial. Would you like to see the storage capabilities on Foofoo?"
#GirlsOwnCC
July 13, 2025 at 5:06 PM
"Don't turn your head that way, Gertie! You'll be against the wind and blow right into the harbor! Men might see your legs before you drown!"
#GirlsOwnCC
July 6, 2025 at 5:35 PM
"It will be alright, Elspeth. I'm sure that young Teddy will tire of his current aspiration to be the proprietor of a niche gentlemen's club when he grows up."
#GirlsOwnCC
June 22, 2025 at 5:23 PM
"I know he's an irredeemable little hellion, Daughter, but isn't that exactly why you married his father? I did try to warn you that 'You can't stop me!' isn't good motivation for marriage."
#GirlsOwnCC
June 22, 2025 at 5:15 PM
"It could be worse. We could have been at that parade in the States yesterday."
#GirlsOwnCC
June 15, 2025 at 7:16 PM
"Emily, I know you're spying on Eunice's coven again. Dear, don't feel left out; we can get our own cauldron, form our own coven, AND perform spells in the nude! We just need to find a spot that Reverend 'Window Peeper' doesn't know about."
#GirlsOwnCC
June 1, 2025 at 5:35 PM
"Congratulations, Alice! You've produced the first parthenogenetic baby!"
Dorothy whispered, "Dear, that's only what she told Mama. Alice was stepping out with an army lieutenant 9 months ago."
#GirlsOwnCC
May 25, 2025 at 5:08 PM