Ninja-Jordan
@ninjaxjordan.bsky.social
I'm a video game critic, enthusiast and self-trained Ninja.
youtube.com/c/NinjaReviews
https://opencritic.com/critic/378/jordan-biordi
youtube.com/c/NinjaReviews
https://opencritic.com/critic/378/jordan-biordi
Because, as was evidenced with Pokémon Scar/Vio, gamers will forgive A LOT of bullshit if a game has an open world.
November 26, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Because, as was evidenced with Pokémon Scar/Vio, gamers will forgive A LOT of bullshit if a game has an open world.
For DKB, that banger ending
For MKW, uninstalling it to make room for Kirby Air Riders.
For MKW, uninstalling it to make room for Kirby Air Riders.
November 26, 2025 at 10:05 PM
For DKB, that banger ending
For MKW, uninstalling it to make room for Kirby Air Riders.
For MKW, uninstalling it to make room for Kirby Air Riders.
Lol so glad someone other than me said it. $112 Canadian Funbucks for some of the worst tracks and a meaningless open world they do NOTHING with.
If this gets the award...well it'll be just another on the thousands of reasons the VGAs are meaningless 😅
If this gets the award...well it'll be just another on the thousands of reasons the VGAs are meaningless 😅
November 26, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Lol so glad someone other than me said it. $112 Canadian Funbucks for some of the worst tracks and a meaningless open world they do NOTHING with.
If this gets the award...well it'll be just another on the thousands of reasons the VGAs are meaningless 😅
If this gets the award...well it'll be just another on the thousands of reasons the VGAs are meaningless 😅
Why is Edna Mode testifying before congress?
November 26, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Why is Edna Mode testifying before congress?
Obviously it's Playstation Twosdays
November 26, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Obviously it's Playstation Twosdays
Is Monday finally returning? Do we dare to dream?
November 24, 2025 at 3:54 PM
Is Monday finally returning? Do we dare to dream?
You're free to elaborate on why it's bad, or why they supposedly died.
November 20, 2025 at 9:52 PM
You're free to elaborate on why it's bad, or why they supposedly died.
The intro of the Silent Hill 2 remake is RUINED by the behind-the-back camera, because you lose that eerie sense of being watched from the distance
November 20, 2025 at 8:48 PM
The intro of the Silent Hill 2 remake is RUINED by the behind-the-back camera, because you lose that eerie sense of being watched from the distance
TANK CONTROLS AND FIXED CAMERA ANGELS ARE BAD!!!
Actually, in horror games where they're primarily used, tank controls work to make movement more stressful and instill the feeling the game is working against you, and fixed camera angels work to dissorient the player.
NO! THEY'RE STUPID AND BAD!
Actually, in horror games where they're primarily used, tank controls work to make movement more stressful and instill the feeling the game is working against you, and fixed camera angels work to dissorient the player.
NO! THEY'RE STUPID AND BAD!
November 20, 2025 at 8:38 PM
TANK CONTROLS AND FIXED CAMERA ANGELS ARE BAD!!!
Actually, in horror games where they're primarily used, tank controls work to make movement more stressful and instill the feeling the game is working against you, and fixed camera angels work to dissorient the player.
NO! THEY'RE STUPID AND BAD!
Actually, in horror games where they're primarily used, tank controls work to make movement more stressful and instill the feeling the game is working against you, and fixed camera angels work to dissorient the player.
NO! THEY'RE STUPID AND BAD!
Lol the game was already essentially you vs. bots if you played on anything other than PC. At least they finally put a name on it
November 20, 2025 at 5:44 PM
Lol the game was already essentially you vs. bots if you played on anything other than PC. At least they finally put a name on it
Which is especially rich coming from Ubisoft since this image exists
November 20, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Which is especially rich coming from Ubisoft since this image exists
Ash finally nutted up and evolved Pikachu eh?
November 18, 2025 at 7:45 PM
Ash finally nutted up and evolved Pikachu eh?
What appears to be a CD? It's clearly a TM
November 17, 2025 at 10:55 PM
What appears to be a CD? It's clearly a TM
My point is, no one is really analyzing this with any sense of nuance. Everyone is screaming to the heavens about the "annoying sidekick" based on one article and a few minutes of gameplay.
November 14, 2025 at 8:07 PM
My point is, no one is really analyzing this with any sense of nuance. Everyone is screaming to the heavens about the "annoying sidekick" based on one article and a few minutes of gameplay.
No one's saying anything outside of "GOD THIS IS THE WORST THING TO HAPPEN TO METROID SINCE THE MURDER MYSTERY PLOT OF OTHER M" and "OMG THE ADDED CLAPTRAP TO METROID EXCEPT NOT REALLY"
November 14, 2025 at 7:39 PM
No one's saying anything outside of "GOD THIS IS THE WORST THING TO HAPPEN TO METROID SINCE THE MURDER MYSTERY PLOT OF OTHER M" and "OMG THE ADDED CLAPTRAP TO METROID EXCEPT NOT REALLY"
Damn, owned twice in one post. Gonna delete my bsky, brb.
November 14, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Damn, owned twice in one post. Gonna delete my bsky, brb.
Like, the Metroid manga fucking OPENS with Samus dreaming of a life where she can just be a normal person. Why would anyone look at this and not go, "oh yeah, Samus wouldn't mind some company on these adventures"
November 14, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Like, the Metroid manga fucking OPENS with Samus dreaming of a life where she can just be a normal person. Why would anyone look at this and not go, "oh yeah, Samus wouldn't mind some company on these adventures"
Also...for like...strictly storytelling and narrative reasons. Y'all remember Samus is a person, right? Like, she's not just a gun on a pair of legs. Giving her a partner, slapstick or not, reenforces the human side of her. That she's open to connection, that she doesn't actively seek solitude.
November 14, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Also...for like...strictly storytelling and narrative reasons. Y'all remember Samus is a person, right? Like, she's not just a gun on a pair of legs. Giving her a partner, slapstick or not, reenforces the human side of her. That she's open to connection, that she doesn't actively seek solitude.
Like I know the whole "Why can't Metroid crawl" became a kind of infamous meme, but its not hard to imagine Nintendo looked at the difficulty of something as big as Metroid Prime and wanted to tone it down a bit.
November 14, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Like I know the whole "Why can't Metroid crawl" became a kind of infamous meme, but its not hard to imagine Nintendo looked at the difficulty of something as big as Metroid Prime and wanted to tone it down a bit.
Like, "I played the first hour of Metroid Prime 4 and there's a comedy sidekick who walks you through the whole thing."
"Okay...but does he chatter in your ear the whole game and constantly ruin the atmosphere?"
"Well, I only played the highly-guided opening hour so..."
"So you don't know?"
"Okay...but does he chatter in your ear the whole game and constantly ruin the atmosphere?"
"Well, I only played the highly-guided opening hour so..."
"So you don't know?"
November 14, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Like, "I played the first hour of Metroid Prime 4 and there's a comedy sidekick who walks you through the whole thing."
"Okay...but does he chatter in your ear the whole game and constantly ruin the atmosphere?"
"Well, I only played the highly-guided opening hour so..."
"So you don't know?"
"Okay...but does he chatter in your ear the whole game and constantly ruin the atmosphere?"
"Well, I only played the highly-guided opening hour so..."
"So you don't know?"
Wow, Pokémon Company isn't fucking around anymore.
"Y'all wanted to complain about the graphics in Z-A? Well guess what, PIKACHU IS DEAD NOW!"
"Y'all wanted to complain about the graphics in Z-A? Well guess what, PIKACHU IS DEAD NOW!"
November 14, 2025 at 2:50 PM
Wow, Pokémon Company isn't fucking around anymore.
"Y'all wanted to complain about the graphics in Z-A? Well guess what, PIKACHU IS DEAD NOW!"
"Y'all wanted to complain about the graphics in Z-A? Well guess what, PIKACHU IS DEAD NOW!"
Lol any time someone brings up Ristar, I can't not think about this 😅
www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2011/1...
www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2011/1...
Retroid - Penny Arcade
Videogaming-related online strip by Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins. Includes news and commentary.
www.penny-arcade.com
November 12, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Lol any time someone brings up Ristar, I can't not think about this 😅
www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2011/1...
www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2011/1...