mjfgates
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mjfgates.bsky.social
mjfgates
@mjfgates.bsky.social
1.4K followers 520 following 14K posts
Retired. Widower. Formerly "that FC with the voice." One of the most ancient shitposters on the internet.
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mjfgates.bsky.social
My most-used words list, from anisota.net/harvest . I see "fuck" and, in much smaller print, "fucking."

This obviously means that I need to use more versions of the word "fuck." Fucktastic! Fucktonian! Fuckeroonie! I will need to contemplate possible uses for these.
A word cloud. "Those, wait, fine, least, fuck," and a bunch of other English.
November 28, 2025 at 2:20 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Really, a bunch of stuff. Like, fernite carbide is trading at 40, when it's usually 80-100? That's just weird. So I go back and look at the history.
Graph of prices of Fernite Carbide from May sometime to present. Starts at about 75, there's a spike to 138 on May 28, and it steadily drops from there for six months.
November 25, 2025 at 8:30 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Why is brain, WHY
It's Tom Bombadil, but instead of the traditional bralette he's got two of the face from darth's pfp crudely pasted on.
November 13, 2025 at 6:00 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
If you see this, post four women characters you love
Section of the original cover for Bujold's "Paladin of Souls," with Ista Cover art from Wells' "Wheel of the Infinite," featuring Maskelle Cover art from McIntyre's "The Exile Waiting," with Mischa Cover art from Friedman's "This Alien Shore," with Jamisia Shido
November 9, 2025 at 6:56 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Oh, no. These are the guys we had killed in '99. XP is descended from the Windows NT, and THOSE devs look like this:
A computer rendering of a lot of very low-polygon people in solid grey, standing with their arms down at their sides.
November 4, 2025 at 5:56 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
...
The "say the line, bart!" meme from the Simpsons, with text changed to: "Say the line, Mark!" "You peasants are nothing without me, nothing" mad cheering
November 1, 2025 at 5:06 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
And this is the skull of the devil as described in the current Oglaf (www.oglaf.com/wishbone/). He won't genocide you, but don't accept any deals from him!
A cartoon drawing of the skull of the devil, saying "I dunno"
October 26, 2025 at 7:57 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
going to guess "zero, because how COULD you?"
A sad bee, holding a "Save the Bees!" sign.
October 25, 2025 at 1:17 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Japanese guy slamming on a taiko drum, with meme text "DOOM... DOOM" added.
October 20, 2025 at 11:45 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
One more piece of evidence to support my theory that the Manuscript is actually a catalog of 1980s-era newspaper comics. Look, this one is obviously about Garfield!
A page from the Voynich Manuscript, depicting some sort of plant-like thing with lots of green blobs, with the usual text stuff written around it.
October 8, 2025 at 1:57 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
now with even more hideous DANGER
A busy farmer's market... with giant hideous spiders drawn on the booths, in very bad MSPaint. I guess they're spiders, five legs is spiders, right?
September 28, 2025 at 12:49 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
And here's the unedited version, showing the real terror of living in the Pacific Northwest:
A nice photo of some people walking in Portland, with a giant tyrannosaurus crudely scribbled in. The tyrannosaur is also missing a leg.
September 28, 2025 at 12:34 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Putting Lander up there wouldn't be quite right, but it needs a lil' something...
A Soviet poster featuring a guy waving a huge red banner. The banner has Marx, Engels, and Lenin, all in profile facing left.
September 6, 2025 at 10:20 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
They can spin their own acrylic yarn! Just set up one of these in the kitchen.
The setup for polymerizing acrylic liquid before it is spun out into fiber via spinnerets. It's a LOT of pipes going every which way, and a couple of 1950s-looking control consoles with buttons and stuff, and a big round object that's probably called something like "The Reactor." The whole gizmo is about twenty feet square.
September 2, 2025 at 9:17 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Sickos dot jpg, only the text on his shirt is edited to say "SICA."
August 27, 2025 at 6:40 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Disc! Horse! Disc! Horse! Disc! Horse! Yaaaaaay!...
A pair of horses pulling a disc harrow across a field.
August 27, 2025 at 2:48 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
please,
same Homer Simpson image from the replied-to post, only there's a "brrt" sound effect coming out of his, uh, waist
August 27, 2025 at 2:41 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Probably also
The Bat-Sub chugging along underwater. Presumably Batman is inside.
August 25, 2025 at 4:13 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Torch? They're very nice for things, I've heard!
Passing a torch.
August 7, 2025 at 10:07 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
some caramel-covered green apples. photo credit https://thegirlinspired.com/about/
August 4, 2025 at 11:15 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
next week's fashion recommendations:
A really big spider.
August 1, 2025 at 10:37 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
Tucker Carlson getting his balls tanned by the Mysterious Glowing Device
July 30, 2025 at 10:58 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
I mean, just look at it! You put this in the water, and push it about one MiG length forward, and it's going to suck in about one MiG volume of water and go straight down.

No idea how the boat dealer got the thing.
A MiG-21 fighter, nose number "4128," on the tarmac. No visible national markings so probably privately owned.
July 29, 2025 at 5:50 PM
mjfgates.bsky.social
You just need one of these
A genAI image of a pencil. The point is pointing about fifteen degrees out of line, the ferrule is way too long, there's a bit of ferrule at the point end. Also it's round not hexagonal, so would be totally useless for rewinding a cassette tape.
July 28, 2025 at 10:20 AM
mjfgates.bsky.social
You could make a cyberpyramitruck!
Ten cybertrucks stacked in a vague pyramid shape, driving through the desert, done with Cheapass Photoshop.
July 28, 2025 at 3:17 AM