Middle Age Riot
@middleageriot.bsky.social
Jokes by John Hartzell. He/him.
"I promise there will be a vote in December to extend healthcare subsidies. I mean it this time."
November 10, 2025 at 2:38 PM
"I promise there will be a vote in December to extend healthcare subsidies. I mean it this time."
In Donald Trump's dreams, he is eating Big Macs on Air Force One and flying to Epstein's rape Island with Ivanka, who is wearing Erika Kirk's leather pants.
November 8, 2025 at 2:46 PM
In Donald Trump's dreams, he is eating Big Macs on Air Force One and flying to Epstein's rape Island with Ivanka, who is wearing Erika Kirk's leather pants.
HE. DOESN'T. GIVE. A. FUCK. ABOUT. ANYONE. BUT. HIMSELF.
November 6, 2025 at 9:07 PM
HE. DOESN'T. GIVE. A. FUCK. ABOUT. ANYONE. BUT. HIMSELF.
As Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi knew her shit, didn't take any shit, and had her shit together.
Mike Johnson, on the other hand, is full of shit, doesn't do shit, and is scared shitless of Trump.
Mike Johnson, on the other hand, is full of shit, doesn't do shit, and is scared shitless of Trump.
November 6, 2025 at 7:03 PM
As Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi knew her shit, didn't take any shit, and had her shit together.
Mike Johnson, on the other hand, is full of shit, doesn't do shit, and is scared shitless of Trump.
Mike Johnson, on the other hand, is full of shit, doesn't do shit, and is scared shitless of Trump.
REMEMBER: The same people who think democratic socialists are communists think Donald Trump is a Christian.
November 5, 2025 at 4:23 PM
REMEMBER: The same people who think democratic socialists are communists think Donald Trump is a Christian.
Republican Jesus: "If you can't afford loaves and fishes, get a job, deadbeat."
November 3, 2025 at 2:48 PM
Republican Jesus: "If you can't afford loaves and fishes, get a job, deadbeat."
Lauren Boebert on Halloween morning: "What can I do to reassure my voters that I am racist garbage?"
November 2, 2025 at 6:56 PM
Lauren Boebert on Halloween morning: "What can I do to reassure my voters that I am racist garbage?"
Happy Halloween to decent people who pretend to be monsters once a year, not monsters who pretend to be decent people.
October 31, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Happy Halloween to decent people who pretend to be monsters once a year, not monsters who pretend to be decent people.
DID YOU KNOW?
Adam and Eve started wearing fig leaves because Nancy Mace wouldn't stop checking their junk.
Adam and Eve started wearing fig leaves because Nancy Mace wouldn't stop checking their junk.
October 29, 2025 at 4:16 PM
DID YOU KNOW?
Adam and Eve started wearing fig leaves because Nancy Mace wouldn't stop checking their junk.
Adam and Eve started wearing fig leaves because Nancy Mace wouldn't stop checking their junk.
"The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." - George Orwell, 1984
October 29, 2025 at 12:56 AM
"The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command." - George Orwell, 1984
Imagine thinking people are this gullible and imagine being right.
October 23, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Imagine thinking people are this gullible and imagine being right.
BELOW: When destroying a rose garden isn't symbolic enough.
October 21, 2025 at 2:05 PM
BELOW: When destroying a rose garden isn't symbolic enough.
Some MAGA aren't waiting for Trump to be king to start bowing.
October 20, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Some MAGA aren't waiting for Trump to be king to start bowing.
In Chicago, the consensus is "fuck Trump."
October 18, 2025 at 11:10 PM
In Chicago, the consensus is "fuck Trump."
Before there were No Kings protests, there was a No Democracy riot.
October 17, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Before there were No Kings protests, there was a No Democracy riot.
DID YOU KNOW: Wonder Woman is so powerful because she comes from an island where healthcare laws aren't written by men.
October 15, 2025 at 3:49 PM
DID YOU KNOW: Wonder Woman is so powerful because she comes from an island where healthcare laws aren't written by men.
This Indigenous Peoples' Day, let's send ICE back where it came from.
October 13, 2025 at 3:04 PM
This Indigenous Peoples' Day, let's send ICE back where it came from.
Joe Biden didn't become president until January 20, while Donald Trump has been a demented turd walrus since birth.
October 12, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Joe Biden didn't become president until January 20, while Donald Trump has been a demented turd walrus since birth.
BELOW: Donald Trump beta tests a new video game designed to his specifications where, if you send your military to attack enough of your own citizens, you win a Nobel Peace Prize.
October 10, 2025 at 1:55 PM
BELOW: Donald Trump beta tests a new video game designed to his specifications where, if you send your military to attack enough of your own citizens, you win a Nobel Peace Prize.
If "never leave your drink unattended" were a person.
October 8, 2025 at 10:36 PM
If "never leave your drink unattended" were a person.
PHOTO: Donald Trump reacts to Benjamin Netanyahu's refusal to use his space lasers to blast Portland.
October 7, 2025 at 10:53 PM
PHOTO: Donald Trump reacts to Benjamin Netanyahu's refusal to use his space lasers to blast Portland.
Fascism is what happens when you're making other plans.
October 6, 2025 at 1:37 PM
Fascism is what happens when you're making other plans.
Nothing excites Republicans quite like the exhilarating combination of racism and cruelty.
October 4, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Nothing excites Republicans quite like the exhilarating combination of racism and cruelty.
Hitler never did his own dirty work either.
October 3, 2025 at 1:59 PM
Hitler never did his own dirty work either.
SHOWN: If the speech at the beginning of Patton were given by Biff from Back to the Future.
October 2, 2025 at 2:19 PM
SHOWN: If the speech at the beginning of Patton were given by Biff from Back to the Future.