They should do MyChart Wrapped

once we’re through Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald day, we’re allowed to move onto the final Holiday Season of the year - (listening to A Long December by The Counting Crows)

43 years ago today, readers the world over opened their newspapers and gazed upon cow tools for the first time. happy birthday cow tools. you look great.

Teenage me screaming "IMA FIGHTA MAN TONIGHT" in my bedroom is feelin' pretty vindicated right now.

Chopped off almost a foot of hair and got some bangs, you know, as a little treat. Looking forward to regretting that in a month.

DMV agent filled out my form incorrectly, not looking forward to untangling that mess, but at least it wasn't a $2k error like last time.

Remember that scene in the video game Amazon Trail where you get forced into trading with Lope de Aguirre (read: giving him items) until you run out, unless you trick him into eating poison?

the process of moving is really the unwanted knowledge of how many entities have your address and how much shit you possess

if my tax dollars can't give me the screaming safety eagle, I don't know why we bother with society.

eat shit nerd