I found it interesting when we were in Amsterdam. We're heading back and, even though everyone speaks english, I thought it'd be fun. I've been on a 550 day streak with Mandarin and needed a break.

Yeah, big season 2 energy. Turning the page on a few things outside of the big 3 (family, love and business). It’s so weird to have stability and consistency in those areas and still have that funky feeling.

*over my dad.

Freudian slip? Who knows. 🚬👌😪

The stuff I’m cooking personally and at the day job is so cool. My biggest moments of growth as a creative are when I see something and say “I didn’t know you were allowed to do that.” I am hoping to do that for others. It’s not cocky to say “I think I have something you’ve never known you wanted.”

Even good memories make me feel pain just like the bad ones so I’m working to keep my hands moving. New memories I can worry about later. I’m in my binary sunset era. I will leave this figurative planet that’s just nostalgia/dwelling. They’re the literal opposite of fun.

I’ve spent fifteen years missing playing in my band and hoping I’d get one more show with them. Forget that. I started a new one. I am writing for the first time since high school. I’m chasing new stuff on all fronts. Hobbies, music, skills, projects.

I have to tell myself that those people giving me the cold shoulder really don’t think about me at all apart from when we’re in the same place and convince myself not to care. But I do care. I want everyone to know my side. Grandma said the truth always comes out and I am betting on that.

I’m finally my dad, I think. I have to tell myself he might just have CTE from hockey and it gets way easier to figure out why someone would do what he does.

There are apologies you’re owed that’ll never come and there are good times you’ll never get back. I have to actively distract myself with busy hands to keep from worrying about stuff that’s old news that I can’t change.

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

Can you repeat that, please?

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

I’m sorry. You have been eliminated. Please go.

That’s incredible. Way to lock in

So worth it!

Okay