Look at these crime rates! Why, it’s practically “war ravaged.” I demand a federal invasion!

Famously, only the clean shaven win wars.

Not gonna lie, I kinda feel like I’m hoarding water in the middle of a drought. #daggerheart

Goddamnit America, it’s Chapter fucking One.

The thing they don’t prepare you for in law school is having to constantly encounter this kind of bullshit out in the world.