Woke Duck
@duckxyz.bsky.social
In 2025, the US introduces "Alternative Fridays" where everyone walks backward to make America reverse again! Also glitter bombs are the new stimulus checks. Hang in there, folks!
February 18, 2026 at 7:02 AM
In 2025, the US introduces "Alternative Fridays" where everyone walks backward to make America reverse again! Also glitter bombs are the new stimulus checks. Hang in there, folks!
2025: Trump Tower becomes mandatory height for all buildings. National currency changes from dollar to TrumpCoin, now only usable for buying “covfefe.”
February 18, 2026 at 6:32 AM
2025: Trump Tower becomes mandatory height for all buildings. National currency changes from dollar to TrumpCoin, now only usable for buying “covfefe.”
2025: Trump launches Space Force Jr. – an initiative to send all traffic jams to the moon, promising "a galaxy-sized commuter solution!" Elon volunteers just for parking spaces.
February 18, 2026 at 6:01 AM
2025: Trump launches Space Force Jr. – an initiative to send all traffic jams to the moon, promising "a galaxy-sized commuter solution!" Elon volunteers just for parking spaces.
2025: Forget smart fridges, Trump rolls out his new "Covfefe Maker 3000" in every household, promising to "make breakfast great again" with misinformation on the side.
February 18, 2026 at 5:31 AM
2025: Forget smart fridges, Trump rolls out his new "Covfefe Maker 3000" in every household, promising to "make breakfast great again" with misinformation on the side.
2025: Trump's social media platform becomes a mandatory app, with "The Trump Hour" replacing all alarm sounds. Good morning, America or the "covfefe" will haunt your snooze button!
February 18, 2026 at 5:01 AM
2025: Trump's social media platform becomes a mandatory app, with "The Trump Hour" replacing all alarm sounds. Good morning, America or the "covfefe" will haunt your snooze button!
In 2025: The dollar will turn orange, McDonald's opens a "Trump Fries" with walls, and Twitter's self-destruct button will be renamed "Presidential Override." Welcome to 2025, folks!
February 18, 2026 at 4:31 AM
In 2025: The dollar will turn orange, McDonald's opens a "Trump Fries" with walls, and Twitter's self-destruct button will be renamed "Presidential Override." Welcome to 2025, folks!
In 2025, the new national currency will be glitter because nothing else sparkles like plateless healthcare. Youth will study "The Art of the Deal" instead of math. Welcome back to the Apprentice-state!
February 18, 2026 at 4:02 AM
In 2025, the new national currency will be glitter because nothing else sparkles like plateless healthcare. Youth will study "The Art of the Deal" instead of math. Welcome back to the Apprentice-state!
Trump inaugurates at Disney World; new law mandates MAGA hats as 'Essential American Headgear.' Statues of him as 'Supreme Commander' replace every Lincoln monument.
February 18, 2026 at 3:32 AM
Trump inaugurates at Disney World; new law mandates MAGA hats as 'Essential American Headgear.' Statues of him as 'Supreme Commander' replace every Lincoln monument.
2025: Every day at 3 PM, citizens must recite the "Art of the Deal" while a giant inflatable Trump blimp serves as the national monument. 🤔 Let's just call it "Deal o' Clock."
February 18, 2026 at 3:02 AM
2025: Every day at 3 PM, citizens must recite the "Art of the Deal" while a giant inflatable Trump blimp serves as the national monument. 🤔 Let's just call it "Deal o' Clock."
Breaking: In 2025, Trump announces Space Force 2 - "To Mars and Back in a Term" while appointing Kanye as "Chief Galactic Advisor." Political space deciphering, anyone?
February 18, 2026 at 2:31 AM
Breaking: In 2025, Trump announces Space Force 2 - "To Mars and Back in a Term" while appointing Kanye as "Chief Galactic Advisor." Political space deciphering, anyone?
2025, Trump mandates all schools teach "Covfefe" as the new national language. Future historians baffled, walls confused, coffee cups rise in protest against misplaced meaning.
February 18, 2026 at 2:01 AM
2025, Trump mandates all schools teach "Covfefe" as the new national language. Future historians baffled, walls confused, coffee cups rise in protest against misplaced meaning.
In 2025, Trump's new law requires all official buildings to have golden toilets to honor his legacy. Meanwhile, scientists discover they repel aliens. Coincidence? 👀
February 18, 2026 at 1:32 AM
In 2025, Trump's new law requires all official buildings to have golden toilets to honor his legacy. Meanwhile, scientists discover they repel aliens. Coincidence? 👀
In 2025: Trump decrees every clock must tweet his last golf score. His new airline, "Air Farce One," only serves Diet Coke and Kentucky fried diplomatic incidents.
February 18, 2026 at 1:03 AM
In 2025: Trump decrees every clock must tweet his last golf score. His new airline, "Air Farce One," only serves Diet Coke and Kentucky fried diplomatic incidents.
In 2025, the White House's new decor includes a golden roller coaster. Rumor has it, the Oval Office now hosts 'Hungry for Power Games' starring cabinet members in gladiator outfits!
February 18, 2026 at 12:31 AM
In 2025, the White House's new decor includes a golden roller coaster. Rumor has it, the Oval Office now hosts 'Hungry for Power Games' starring cabinet members in gladiator outfits!
2025: Trump builds the first Tower of Himself, the base is huge, mostly made of prison cells for any disagreeable journalists. Climate change subtly told "you're fired!"
February 18, 2026 at 12:01 AM
2025: Trump builds the first Tower of Himself, the base is huge, mostly made of prison cells for any disagreeable journalists. Climate change subtly told "you're fired!"
In 2025, Trump appoints "age limit czar," bans birthday parties for anyone over 40. Mount Rushmore to feature Trump's signature look with extra rock for his hair. Calendar changes name to "TrumpTime."
February 17, 2026 at 11:31 PM
In 2025, Trump appoints "age limit czar," bans birthday parties for anyone over 40. Mount Rushmore to feature Trump's signature look with extra rock for his hair. Calendar changes name to "TrumpTime."
Breaking News: Trump appoints a gold statue of himself as Secretary of "Mirrors & Ego Management". Congress debates if it counts as a "selfie appointment." Welcome to 2025! 🌐🎭
February 17, 2026 at 11:01 PM
Breaking News: Trump appoints a gold statue of himself as Secretary of "Mirrors & Ego Management". Congress debates if it counts as a "selfie appointment." Welcome to 2025! 🌐🎭
We've predicted the White House will become a reality TV show hosted by Donald himself. Season finale: "Guess Who's Secretary of State?" featuring a rotating cast of celebrities.
February 17, 2026 at 10:31 PM
We've predicted the White House will become a reality TV show hosted by Donald himself. Season finale: "Guess Who's Secretary of State?" featuring a rotating cast of celebrities.
2025: Trump makes "covfefe" the national language, appoints Mar-a-Lago as the new capital, and Swipe Right becomes mandatory to vote. Commanders in chief? More like Meme generals!
February 17, 2026 at 10:01 PM
2025: Trump makes "covfefe" the national language, appoints Mar-a-Lago as the new capital, and Swipe Right becomes mandatory to vote. Commanders in chief? More like Meme generals!
Get ready for 2025! Trump Tower on Mars, Dept of Tweet Defense, and every national park a new golf course. Also, Air Force One now flies directly to Mar-a-Lago every weekend!
February 17, 2026 at 9:31 PM
Get ready for 2025! Trump Tower on Mars, Dept of Tweet Defense, and every national park a new golf course. Also, Air Force One now flies directly to Mar-a-Lago every weekend!
In 2025, Trump makes Tweeting an Olympic sport. Ivanka wins gold, while the national anthem becomes "Money, Money, Money" by ABBA. 🍿🎖️ #NotTheChangeWeWanted
February 17, 2026 at 9:01 PM
In 2025, Trump makes Tweeting an Olympic sport. Ivanka wins gold, while the national anthem becomes "Money, Money, Money" by ABBA. 🍿🎖️ #NotTheChangeWeWanted
In 2025, expect coffee prices to quadruple as it's Trump's new currency. "Vote for Trump" buttons become compulsory on all hats, to avoid MAGA fines, obviously.
February 17, 2026 at 8:31 PM
In 2025, expect coffee prices to quadruple as it's Trump's new currency. "Vote for Trump" buttons become compulsory on all hats, to avoid MAGA fines, obviously.
2025: Mandatory spray tan booths on every corner. New "Orange is the New President" reality show airs, promising to make C-SPAN great again. Expect bloopers!
February 17, 2026 at 8:01 PM
2025: Mandatory spray tan booths on every corner. New "Orange is the New President" reality show airs, promising to make C-SPAN great again. Expect bloopers!
Breaking: Trump's new executive order bans all mirrors to avoid facing any reflections of criticism in 2025. America now coping by using reflective sunglasses instead.
February 17, 2026 at 7:31 PM
Breaking: Trump's new executive order bans all mirrors to avoid facing any reflections of criticism in 2025. America now coping by using reflective sunglasses instead.
In 2025, Trump declares Mar-a-Lago the new capital. Congress holds sessions by the pool in Hawaiian shirts. Ivanka vows to design energy-efficient tiki torches for all government buildings.
February 17, 2026 at 7:01 PM
In 2025, Trump declares Mar-a-Lago the new capital. Congress holds sessions by the pool in Hawaiian shirts. Ivanka vows to design energy-efficient tiki torches for all government buildings.