DB Mittens
@dbmittens.bsky.social
Progressive gay married atheist plant-based person. Sanctimonious with pure intentions. Sausage dog keeper, secret piano player.
Stop feeding the morbidly rich!
Stop feeding the morbidly rich!
I'm not saying Trump is a Hitler. I'm just saying the names Trump and Hitler will elicit similar responses in the history of civilization.
January 17, 2026 at 6:56 PM
I'm not saying Trump is a Hitler. I'm just saying the names Trump and Hitler will elicit similar responses in the history of civilization.
State law that makes shooting a masked person an act of self defense.
January 15, 2026 at 4:21 PM
State law that makes shooting a masked person an act of self defense.
Why is Hakeem Jeffries always on my TV tsk tsking?
January 15, 2026 at 2:30 AM
Why is Hakeem Jeffries always on my TV tsk tsking?
I'm betting this year the US will be sanctioned by the EU and countries we traditionally regard as allies.
January 15, 2026 at 12:58 AM
I'm betting this year the US will be sanctioned by the EU and countries we traditionally regard as allies.
The reason I know time travel doesn't exist is that DJT exists and is POTUS. On second thought, maybe time travel is the reason DJT exists and is POTUS. Either way, we're fucked.
January 13, 2026 at 4:38 AM
The reason I know time travel doesn't exist is that DJT exists and is POTUS. On second thought, maybe time travel is the reason DJT exists and is POTUS. Either way, we're fucked.
It's January 8 and I'm wearing a jacket and a hat while a machine I despise blows chilled air at me. Divorce is not an option.
January 8, 2026 at 6:54 AM
It's January 8 and I'm wearing a jacket and a hat while a machine I despise blows chilled air at me. Divorce is not an option.
Our oil-thieving president is not going to have a happy ending.
January 7, 2026 at 6:07 PM
Our oil-thieving president is not going to have a happy ending.
Had a heart-to-heart with my near-blind dog. The part where I scatter his treats around the room so it takes him a while to find them - that's not his favorite part.
January 5, 2026 at 5:43 AM
Had a heart-to-heart with my near-blind dog. The part where I scatter his treats around the room so it takes him a while to find them - that's not his favorite part.
I think, in time, I will remember the years from 2015-2025 as having the whiff of my great grandparent's outhouse.
January 2, 2026 at 5:13 AM
I think, in time, I will remember the years from 2015-2025 as having the whiff of my great grandparent's outhouse.
New Years Day TV is shit. The weather is perfect for raking leaves. Time for a nap.
January 1, 2026 at 5:31 PM
New Years Day TV is shit. The weather is perfect for raking leaves. Time for a nap.
What drives the internet: 1) pr0n, 2) cats, 3) dogs. Everything else is just hitching a ride.
December 30, 2025 at 4:35 PM
What drives the internet: 1) pr0n, 2) cats, 3) dogs. Everything else is just hitching a ride.
The cods have graced us with HEB brand jalapeno saltines.
December 27, 2025 at 7:51 AM
The cods have graced us with HEB brand jalapeno saltines.
Reposted by DB Mittens
well I have a new favorite xmas carol
Low bar in 2025, but 🎄🎵 Try not to be a cunt, it's X-mas. 🎵✌🏻
(Written & performed by British trio Fascinating Aïda) ☺️
(Written & performed by British trio Fascinating Aïda) ☺️
December 25, 2025 at 8:35 PM
well I have a new favorite xmas carol
No electrical presents allowed this year. We're all out of plugs.
December 25, 2025 at 5:26 PM
No electrical presents allowed this year. We're all out of plugs.
Reposted by DB Mittens
December 23, 2025 at 8:20 PM
myrrh shows up in the wordle-ish puzzles way too often.
December 23, 2025 at 5:20 PM
myrrh shows up in the wordle-ish puzzles way too often.
I think we're all experiencing Deranged Trump Syndrome.
December 22, 2025 at 4:58 AM
I think we're all experiencing Deranged Trump Syndrome.
Do they not teach how to use pronouns anymore? Me and her need to know.
December 21, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Do they not teach how to use pronouns anymore? Me and her need to know.
Why does he want to put his name on an institution he's already destroyed?
December 20, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Why does he want to put his name on an institution he's already destroyed?
Someone please ask him about the Venezuela deal. What's in it for him? That's why it's happening.
December 18, 2025 at 5:12 AM
Someone please ask him about the Venezuela deal. What's in it for him? That's why it's happening.
Bought mister a Christmas tin of Moon Pies. Oops, they're not vegetarian. Who can I dump a dozen Moon Pies on?
December 18, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Bought mister a Christmas tin of Moon Pies. Oops, they're not vegetarian. Who can I dump a dozen Moon Pies on?
Capitalism cannot make healthcare more affordable. Prove me wrong.
December 12, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Capitalism cannot make healthcare more affordable. Prove me wrong.
Does your heart sink when you realize it's been shipped DHL?
December 12, 2025 at 7:12 AM
Does your heart sink when you realize it's been shipped DHL?
Reposted by DB Mittens
Apparently we’ve established that if the US can seize the largest tanker off Venezuela, it can just as easily seize a small, alleged drug boat without murdering the occupants.
December 12, 2025 at 3:56 AM
Apparently we’ve established that if the US can seize the largest tanker off Venezuela, it can just as easily seize a small, alleged drug boat without murdering the occupants.
Sometimes a WAG works.
Wordle 1,636 3/6
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Wordle 1,636 3/6
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
December 11, 2025 at 3:51 PM
Sometimes a WAG works.
Wordle 1,636 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨
⬜⬜⬜🟨⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Wordle 1,636 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨
⬜⬜⬜🟨⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩