Chris Oldwood
@chrisoldwood.bsky.social
skeet = reinterpret_cast(life)
Pinned
Chris Oldwood
@chrisoldwood.bsky.social
· Oct 21
#Introduction
@chrisoldwood = IT ∩ Dad Jokes
Author of far more than 97 puns every programmer should know…
Sets from Lightning talks:
[2016] Continuous Delivery & Becoming a Bitter Programmer
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2016/04/stan...
[2017] Wit Limits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2017/12/wit-...
@chrisoldwood = IT ∩ Dad Jokes
Author of far more than 97 puns every programmer should know…
Sets from Lightning talks:
[2016] Continuous Delivery & Becoming a Bitter Programmer
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2016/04/stan...
[2017] Wit Limits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2017/12/wit-...
The Enterprise Manifesto
JIRA and PR slop over individuals and interactions
While we value the agile manifesto, we value the AI manifesto more.
JIRA and PR slop over individuals and interactions
While we value the agile manifesto, we value the AI manifesto more.
November 16, 2025 at 8:12 AM
The Enterprise Manifesto
JIRA and PR slop over individuals and interactions
While we value the agile manifesto, we value the AI manifesto more.
JIRA and PR slop over individuals and interactions
While we value the agile manifesto, we value the AI manifesto more.
I was just making a note to blog about "scriptable components" when I discovered I'd already written it almost 15 years ago :o)
[2011] PowerShell & .Net - Building Systems as Toolkits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-fi...
("Even PowerShell is a relative newcomer on the corporate stage" 😀.)
[2011] PowerShell & .Net - Building Systems as Toolkits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-fi...
("Even PowerShell is a relative newcomer on the corporate stage" 😀.)
PowerShell & .Net - Building Systems as Toolkits
Tales of a computer programmer.
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com
November 15, 2025 at 5:13 PM
I was just making a note to blog about "scriptable components" when I discovered I'd already written it almost 15 years ago :o)
[2011] PowerShell & .Net - Building Systems as Toolkits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-fi...
("Even PowerShell is a relative newcomer on the corporate stage" 😀.)
[2011] PowerShell & .Net - Building Systems as Toolkits
chrisoldwood.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-fi...
("Even PowerShell is a relative newcomer on the corporate stage" 😀.)
Oblique Strategy of the Day:
November 14, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Oblique Strategy of the Day:
When God invented the debugger to help programmers understand flow at runtime, I reckon Satan’s counter move was the dependency injection framework. AI was never a threat, it’s always been DI…
November 13, 2025 at 9:11 PM
When God invented the debugger to help programmers understand flow at runtime, I reckon Satan’s counter move was the dependency injection framework. AI was never a threat, it’s always been DI…
Are anybody else’s kids as clumsy as mine? It seems like they get a new phone every week. I can’t keep up with all their new numbers!
:P
:P
November 11, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Are anybody else’s kids as clumsy as mine? It seems like they get a new phone every week. I can’t keep up with all their new numbers!
:P
:P
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
Rosalind Franklin
Leaving her notes in a pile
That she keeps by the door
Who is it for?
Awful James Watson
Stealing the credit
And snaffling all the awards
Misogynist bore
Leaving her notes in a pile
That she keeps by the door
Who is it for?
Awful James Watson
Stealing the credit
And snaffling all the awards
Misogynist bore
November 7, 2025 at 10:45 PM
Rosalind Franklin
Leaving her notes in a pile
That she keeps by the door
Who is it for?
Awful James Watson
Stealing the credit
And snaffling all the awards
Misogynist bore
Leaving her notes in a pile
That she keeps by the door
Who is it for?
Awful James Watson
Stealing the credit
And snaffling all the awards
Misogynist bore
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
OldVersion.com Archive Facing Shutdown Due to Financing Issues
OldVersion.com Archive Facing Shutdown Due to Financing Issues
Finding older versions of particular software can be a real chore, all too often only made possible by the sheer grace and benevolence of their creators. At the same time …read more
hackaday.com
November 8, 2025 at 4:00 AM
OldVersion.com Archive Facing Shutdown Due to Financing Issues
I asked Meghan Trainor to explain the joke about there only being 10 kinds of people in the world. For some reason she started singing “it's all about the base”.
November 8, 2025 at 11:43 AM
I asked Meghan Trainor to explain the joke about there only being 10 kinds of people in the world. For some reason she started singing “it's all about the base”.
Apparently Git is 20 years old this year, but nobody really knows for sure because all the rebasing has blurred the history.
November 7, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Apparently Git is 20 years old this year, but nobody really knows for sure because all the rebasing has blurred the history.
“[AI] is useless. It only [pretends to] give you the answer” — Pablo Picasso
November 6, 2025 at 7:52 PM
“[AI] is useless. It only [pretends to] give you the answer” — Pablo Picasso
There are 10 kinds of AI. Those that can regurgitate existing programming jokes.
November 5, 2025 at 4:23 PM
There are 10 kinds of AI. Those that can regurgitate existing programming jokes.
When provisioning cheap networks, load balancers, and servers in the cloud, I always do it in batches of 100. As the old saying goes “infra penny, infra pound”…
November 5, 2025 at 8:11 AM
When provisioning cheap networks, load balancers, and servers in the cloud, I always do it in batches of 100. As the old saying goes “infra penny, infra pound”…
There’s some world class bike-shedding in here :o).
My latest: Move over bat tunnel, here’s the wild story of how HS2 were forced to build a multi-million pound bridge for a road that… doesn’t actually exist.
How HS2 built a bridge to nowhere
A state-of-the-art road bridge has been built deep in the heart of rural Buckinghamshire. Designed to carry traffic over the HS2 railway, there's just one tiny problem - there's no actual road.
martinrobbins.substack.com
November 4, 2025 at 9:09 AM
There’s some world class bike-shedding in here :o).
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
(comic) When you get a chance
November 3, 2025 at 4:26 PM
(comic) When you get a chance
[article] Afterwood — Occupational Hazard
accu.org/journals/ove...
My irreverent back-pager for the latest ACCU Overload journal explores programmer job titles.
accu.org/journals/ove...
My irreverent back-pager for the latest ACCU Overload journal explores programmer job titles.
Afterwood
The plethora of names for our profession is an occupational hazard. Chris Oldwood considers those he’s encountered.
accu.org
November 3, 2025 at 7:45 AM
[article] Afterwood — Occupational Hazard
accu.org/journals/ove...
My irreverent back-pager for the latest ACCU Overload journal explores programmer job titles.
accu.org/journals/ove...
My irreverent back-pager for the latest ACCU Overload journal explores programmer job titles.
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
I've been getting back into the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series after many years, and the most relatable part is how everyday objects like doors and elevators have been imbued with artificial intelligence and it just makes them obnoxious and frustrating to use and everyone hates it.
November 1, 2025 at 8:55 PM
I've been getting back into the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series after many years, and the most relatable part is how everyday objects like doors and elevators have been imbued with artificial intelligence and it just makes them obnoxious and frustrating to use and everyone hates it.
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
The Somerset carnivals are the most extraordinary folk art we have in England and no one knows about it. Start at 52 minutes in and come and see the real thing next week.
My home town tonight. Rewind to about -2.28 for the start of the good shit.
www.youtube.com/live/GnjkM3N...
www.youtube.com/live/GnjkM3N...
Bridgwater Guy Fawkes Carnival 2025
YouTube video by BGFCarnival
www.youtube.com
November 1, 2025 at 11:08 PM
The Somerset carnivals are the most extraordinary folk art we have in England and no one knows about it. Start at 52 minutes in and come and see the real thing next week.
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
How every history and science textbook should start
November 2, 2025 at 10:00 AM
How every history and science textbook should start
Given the recent outage by AWS it’s probably time for a reminder of that seminal late 90’s paper from Richard Cook:
How Complex Systems Fail
www.adaptivecapacitylabs.com/HowComplexSy...
How Complex Systems Fail
www.adaptivecapacitylabs.com/HowComplexSy...
www.adaptivecapacitylabs.com
November 1, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Given the recent outage by AWS it’s probably time for a reminder of that seminal late 90’s paper from Richard Cook:
How Complex Systems Fail
www.adaptivecapacitylabs.com/HowComplexSy...
How Complex Systems Fail
www.adaptivecapacitylabs.com/HowComplexSy...
[2023] Afterwood — Ghosts in the Machine
accu.org/journals/ove...
A Halloween themed back-pager by me from two years ago.
accu.org/journals/ove...
A Halloween themed back-pager by me from two years ago.
Afterwood
Halloween has been and gone. Chris Oldwood therefore takes time to consider the ghosts in the machine.
accu.org
November 1, 2025 at 11:24 AM
[2023] Afterwood — Ghosts in the Machine
accu.org/journals/ove...
A Halloween themed back-pager by me from two years ago.
accu.org/journals/ove...
A Halloween themed back-pager by me from two years ago.
So Strava are now displaying the recording device right in the activity heading. Does that mean Strava & Garmin have kissed and made up?
October 31, 2025 at 3:48 PM
So Strava are now displaying the recording device right in the activity heading. Does that mean Strava & Garmin have kissed and made up?
I can't believe it's a coincidence that since the Microsoft outage the OneDrive icon looks like a storm cloud...
October 31, 2025 at 12:14 PM
I can't believe it's a coincidence that since the Microsoft outage the OneDrive icon looks like a storm cloud...
Reposted by Chris Oldwood
I'm writing another book, and the first few chapters are available through Manning Early Access now! For 50% off!
hubs.la/Q03Q9PGP0
More details, and the story of how I came to write it, are on my blog at
ericlippert.com/2025/10/30/i...
It feels great to be writing again after a long break. :)
hubs.la/Q03Q9PGP0
More details, and the story of how I came to write it, are on my blog at
ericlippert.com/2025/10/30/i...
It feels great to be writing again after a long break. :)
Fabulous Adventures in Data Structures and Algorithms - Eric Lippert
Author Eric Lippert introduces fabulous solutions using uncommon algorithms and data structures.
There’s a lot more to algorithms than the useful-but-boring recipes you recite for every interview. Th...
hubs.la
October 30, 2025 at 4:39 PM
I'm writing another book, and the first few chapters are available through Manning Early Access now! For 50% off!
hubs.la/Q03Q9PGP0
More details, and the story of how I came to write it, are on my blog at
ericlippert.com/2025/10/30/i...
It feels great to be writing again after a long break. :)
hubs.la/Q03Q9PGP0
More details, and the story of how I came to write it, are on my blog at
ericlippert.com/2025/10/30/i...
It feels great to be writing again after a long break. :)
If you fall for the allure of cheap computing, the only thing that’ll end up in the cloud is your judgement…
:P
:P
Microsoft: Operation failed, X is unlicensed, good luck figuring out what licence you need, (won't be called X).
Google: Operation failed, you've hit a hard quota, good luck contacting a human to fix.
Amazon: Everything worked, but good luck figuring out why you're paying 10x what you expected.
Google: Operation failed, you've hit a hard quota, good luck contacting a human to fix.
Amazon: Everything worked, but good luck figuring out why you're paying 10x what you expected.
October 31, 2025 at 9:10 AM
If you fall for the allure of cheap computing, the only thing that’ll end up in the cloud is your judgement…
:P
:P
LOL, the embedded AI tool in Confluence lists the answer for itself -- Confluence -- at the bottom of the list.
October 30, 2025 at 6:50 PM
LOL, the embedded AI tool in Confluence lists the answer for itself -- Confluence -- at the bottom of the list.