A 4 min mile would have been a world record! Everyone involved was definitely drunk, including the reporter. 😂 which honestly makes it even funnier.

I will also take the Huge Wax (ing?) closet

Two bathtubs in the mudroom is brilliant though. We can get so so muddy.

I want to go to there

Oh no he’s right about that one.

The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

Now we just need to know if it’s stupidity or dementia talking.

It’s not a lie if he believes it.

I like that I’m not sure which animal is the narrator.

Oh wow. The old door was indeed nicer. That was an actual choice he made.

“It’s gotta be marble. All marble. I don’t care how much it costs. Except the door. Get me the most basic fucking door you’ve ever seen. And leave the hatch to the attic. Right over the shower. It’s how the nicest motels do it.”

There’s only ever been one good response for Nazis.