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bransonreese.bsky.social
Branson COMMS OPEN
@bransonreese.bsky.social
36K followers 830 following 3.1K posts
"Delightfully tacky, yet unrefined"
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bransonreese.bsky.social
I'm sorry
School Bully Not So Tough Since Being Molested
December 4, 2025 at 4:53 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
nicole-sews.bigcartel.com
HANDMADE MINI-QUILTS 10% OFF w/ code SOFTLAUNCH original designs and a few by • Branson Reese! nicole-sews.bigcartel.com
December 3, 2025 at 8:21 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
nicole-sews.bigcartel.com

My wife's store is having a Cyber Monday sale. All of her original quilts are available for purchase as well as my Swan Boy designs. Supplies are limited! Hurry!
A beautiful quilt with the text "I have a theory about the seabed, as I'm sure you know. This theory has destroyed most of my relationships. I have only you. Are you like the others? Are you afraid of ideas?" sewn in by hand. A beautiful quilt with the text "I have disrupted the dentistry industry by automating teeth. With my company, you can subscribe to molars for a basic fee and upgrade your plan if you want them to be tooth-colored. I am about to beta-test canines that tell you how much battery is left on your phone. I'll never be lonely again." sewn in by hand. A beautiful quilt with the text "I had seen him before, I thought. I felt he belonged in a pool. Maybe a lake... but certainly floating, unsubmergable. Some people just don't look right with gravity." sewn in by hand. A beautiful quilt with the text "Something quite unusual has sprouted from my garden. It grew from something my rude son buried. I hardly sleep these days. I just press my forehead to my window and try to count its arms. I can usually reach 167 before my polite son comes home and closes the blinds." sewn in by hand.
December 1, 2025 at 9:39 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
A poster for the film Cannibal Holocaust (1980)
November 23, 2025 at 8:44 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Might as well complete the trio
Noel as Aki Hayakawa from Chainsaw Man
November 15, 2025 at 5:40 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Swan Boy as Power from Chainsaw Man
November 14, 2025 at 8:51 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Mods are awake but indifferent, post rare Ronas
Some Rona warmup drawings I did to get ready for a day of commissions
November 14, 2025 at 5:31 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
November 10, 2025 at 3:29 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Look at these bad boys.
A festive Swan Boy quilt A festive Rona quilt Not to be outdone, a festive Noel quilt
November 10, 2025 at 7:15 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN FOR THE HOLIDAY SEASON

docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1F...
COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN! bsky- @bransonreese.bsky.social insta- @bransonofgod You're looking at three profile picture sized images. One is of Swan Boy in full color with a fun pink background. One is of Rona having some sort of spell or something. She's in color but there's no background. Then you've got Cassie is beautiful HD black and white. Prices are listed below. ($250 for full color w/background, $200 for color with no background, and $175 for black and white) A little lower down there's Swan Boy in a Black Flag t-shirt painting a dollar sign on a canvas. ALL OTHER COMMISSIONS START AT $300 And then I tell you what I will and won't do for a commission: YES: Animals, OCs, Humans, Full comics, Really whatever. NO: I'm an open-minded guy. Don't push it, though. FIL OUT THE FORM IN THE LINK TO RESERVE YOUR SPOT. MOVE FAST - SPOTS ARE LIMITED
November 9, 2025 at 10:33 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Cool photo I took a few seconds after waking up when Joe Camel hit me with his car
An old Camel ad. Joe Camel is leaning against his car smoking. His henchman Mel Camel is offering me a cigarette. It's clear that they intended only to teach me a lesson, not to hurt me. It's okay that they hit me with their car. Just look at that sunset. God, I feel more alive than I have in years.
November 6, 2025 at 6:42 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
I will be taking no further questions
Text: HOW ANIMALS WORK IN SWAN BOY EVERYBODY'S AN ANIMAL PERSON. THERE ARE ALSO ANIMALS. THIS IS NOT CONSIDERED STRANGE. Beneath is an image of a hardcore guy who's a rhino next to an actual rhino. A redhead turtle with sort of an early 60s haircut next to an actual box turtle. And Rona next to an actual sphynx cat. That's right she's a cat. Get over it. Text: ANIMAL PEOPLE ARE AWARE THAT THERE ARE ANIMALS THAT LOOK LIKE THEM BUT THERE'S NO MORE SOLIDARITY THAN YOU HAVE WITH, LIKE, A CHIMP. AN EAGLE GUY WOULDN'T BE LIKE "MY CULTURE IS NOT A COSTUME" ABOUT AMERICAN ICON-OGRAPHY. I MEAN MAYBE ONE GUY WOULD TRY IT BUT IT WOULD BE A WEIRD MOVE. Image: a middle aged bald eagle man who looks like he works in Dilbert's office next to an actual bald eagle Text: "BUT BRAAANSON! YOU HAD A STRIP EARLY ON WHERE YOU IMPLIED DOGS -AND THEREFORE ALL ANIMALS-ARE CANONICALLY LITTLE MEN!" SO I DID. I CHANGED MY MIND. Image: a dog woman walking a tiny nude man on a leash. He's running away from a poop.
October 28, 2025 at 5:51 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Little kid Noel from a Swan Boy I never got around to finishing and now all that's left is this drawing. Don't remember where I was going with this.
Noel as a little kid in a Bullets jacket eating McDonald's. He's wearing a seatbelt but there's no rest if the car, indicating that I gave up on whatever I was working on here. I'd put the year this drawing is set in at 95 or 96.
October 24, 2025 at 10:05 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
swanboy.com
Swan Boy, Rona, Noel, and little Al Jardine (not pictured) standing around beneath text beckoning you to read some amazing webcomics over at swanboy.com
October 21, 2025 at 5:47 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
swanboy.com
Swan Boy wearing a Descendents shirt becking you to visit swanboy.com. The background looks like a vacation to southern Florida threw up "all over da place"
October 20, 2025 at 3:00 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Am I crazy in thinking this looks a little familiar? Like would I be out of line for thinking "hey what the fuck?" about this?
Screenshot from a YouTube video that asks "WILL AI SLOP KILL KURZUESACT AND ARTISTS?" The avatar of AI slop is a weird bird with a planet earth head, muscular arms, and -I'll say it- sort of a striking resemblance to Swan Boy
October 7, 2025 at 7:12 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Can't believe she actually said this shit
[Instrumental Break] [Verse 3] Out on tour with The Smashing Pumpkins Nature kids, I, they don't have no function I don't understand what they mean And I could really give a fuck The Stone Temple Pilots, they're elegant bachelors They're foxy to me, are they foxy to you? I will agree they deserve absolutely nothing Nothing more than me
October 4, 2025 at 10:03 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
The Skinner meme Top panel: Am I out of touch? Bottom panel: No, it's the children who need to know enough about nu-metal that I can talk about individual bassists without naming the bands they're from
September 26, 2025 at 11:41 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Saved you a click: they beheaded a horse
Jeopardy!'s Most Infamous Moment Haunted the Show's Fans, Its Stars, and Even Alex Trebek. It's Clear Why Now. BY CLAIRE MCNEAR
September 16, 2025 at 4:44 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
A post from a Facebook group (that I'm not in by the way, I'm not a baby) called "The Barney Universe." It says "Different eras... same purple legend. 🦖 💜" Beneath it are two different pictures of Barney. One is the smiling 90s Barney and the other is a weird CGI Barney with big eyes in an -I'll say it- much more athletic pose." There are 585 reactions, 95 comments, and 108 shares. The top comment is from somebody named Isabelle Fifield whose name I probably should've blocked out but whatever. It says "That is NOT Barney"
September 15, 2025 at 10:15 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
I have just received what I believe may be the biggest news story of the day.
An image of the Mario characters happily posing for what may be their greatest adventure yet. The text is "THE FIRST SUPER MARIO BROS. MOVIE 2 TRAILER WILL LIKELY DROP SOON"
September 11, 2025 at 4:41 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
"It turns out they had skin"
A picture from Facebook from some stupid group. Maybe they're cool. Maybe you know a guy who works there and this alt text hurt their feelings. But whatever it's a dumb group. The picture is of a dinosaur leg and the text says "A DINOSAUR LEG WITH SKIN, FOUND AT TANIS AND DATING TO THE ASTEROID IMPACT 66 MILLION YEARS AGO, OFFERS NEW INSIGHTS INTO THE EXTINCTION EVENT." Actually here's also a picture of a meteor hitting the earth in a little circle. I assume it's not a real picture from that fateful day but what do I know.
August 30, 2025 at 5:58 AM
bransonreese.bsky.social
I can. I'm not, but I have the capacity.
A sponsored tweet by some stupid guy "You cannot be anti-science and pro technology."
August 5, 2025 at 10:15 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
The 5.8 words every girl wants to hear
A man who looks like a cross between basically every silent film comedian. His name is Charles Dorety. His credit is listed as "Stunned Pepperino Eater (uncredit..."
August 2, 2025 at 6:16 PM
bransonreese.bsky.social
Let the kids play, ref!
A picture of the Marx Brothers from a Marx Brothers facebook group I'm in. It's divided into two horizontal pictures, one on top of the other. The top image is the Marx Brothers out of character, smiling like early 20th century men. The bottom half is them in character with all of their heads resting on a table or counter of some sort. If you're extremely stupid it might look like their bodies aren't attached. That's where I come in. I've commented "They were beheaded. A terrible loss." Only here's the thing: my comment is pending approval from a group admin. It seems fascism has finally made it to America...
July 23, 2025 at 11:25 PM