Oh no, no, no. It’ll be more than eight, well, there anyway.

I’m going to Carmarthen tomorrow, I shall call in for a couple of rissoles.

It’ll be all the hungover eejits that need to get the party stuff in tomorrow, you know, the ones that were rushing to their works piss up today. Just buying loads of nibbles that’ll be out of date by Tuesday!

Just back from some of mine, food and drink trip, a haircut and an increasing urge to scream at the selfish twats who can’t park or drive properly.
#TenseIndeed

You probably won’t reply, but I would like to say thank you for every piece of writing you have ever written. I read Salems Lot before the tv series, I read Carrie before the movie…and so it went on with every story.Just thank you for making my formative years an awakening of astounding imagination

Hashtag Global Nonce type of thing? Can just see JR ‘on’ his ‘vibes’. “My sister fucked my Dad, pay me loads and I’ll send the video to you *”

*allegedly of course

Did that last year, overrated, have gone for just the two days this year, there just isn’t enough wine and beer about to keep me home.

#nextyearmaybe

*puts tenner on United to win with a penalty in injury time *

And only having to turn up, sign the book, then fuck off back to baking ‘special brownies’ for her idol. Oh, and getting a quick latte with Boris’s girl on the way back.

That’s me fucked for going over there, the stupid fat kiddy fiddling fuck.

Just the one?

Sounds like a right plonker.