Matthew Malenich
@axl-warpshaft.bsky.social
Writer, artist (on occasion), and Penguins fan. I make horrible things happen to imaginary people. Pro Oxford comma. Pro em dash.
I've been writing seriously since 2007, but only feel like I got a handle on things within the last few years. He/Him.
I've been writing seriously since 2007, but only feel like I got a handle on things within the last few years. He/Him.
The whole article is basically, "This one thing that didn't happen didn't happen, but a couple other things that didn't happen 𝘥𝘪𝘥 happen. Also, we're calling an audible on this Mary worship stuff that's totally not happening, even though it demonstrably is happening."
November 13, 2025 at 5:49 PM
The whole article is basically, "This one thing that didn't happen didn't happen, but a couple other things that didn't happen 𝘥𝘪𝘥 happen. Also, we're calling an audible on this Mary worship stuff that's totally not happening, even though it demonstrably is happening."
2/2
...two girls in senior high that liked me. Or were at least interested in me. But no joke, I didn't figure it out until I was in my early 20's. One of them, I ran into her brother in my early 20's, and he said something like, "Oh yeah. My sister used to talk about you all the time."
...two girls in senior high that liked me. Or were at least interested in me. But no joke, I didn't figure it out until I was in my early 20's. One of them, I ran into her brother in my early 20's, and he said something like, "Oh yeah. My sister used to talk about you all the time."
homer simpson from the simpsons is standing in front of a shelf with stuffed animals and says d ' oh .
ALT: homer simpson from the simpsons is standing in front of a shelf with stuffed animals and says d ' oh .
media.tenor.com
November 12, 2025 at 7:30 PM
2/2
...two girls in senior high that liked me. Or were at least interested in me. But no joke, I didn't figure it out until I was in my early 20's. One of them, I ran into her brother in my early 20's, and he said something like, "Oh yeah. My sister used to talk about you all the time."
...two girls in senior high that liked me. Or were at least interested in me. But no joke, I didn't figure it out until I was in my early 20's. One of them, I ran into her brother in my early 20's, and he said something like, "Oh yeah. My sister used to talk about you all the time."
1/2
I got bullied for a while. But when I put on 35 lbs in about sixteen months, at the end of junior high, that problem more or less took care of itself. My biggest problem in school was a complete lack of social skills and social awareness. Particularly around the opposite sex.
There were...
I got bullied for a while. But when I put on 35 lbs in about sixteen months, at the end of junior high, that problem more or less took care of itself. My biggest problem in school was a complete lack of social skills and social awareness. Particularly around the opposite sex.
There were...
November 12, 2025 at 7:28 PM
1/2
I got bullied for a while. But when I put on 35 lbs in about sixteen months, at the end of junior high, that problem more or less took care of itself. My biggest problem in school was a complete lack of social skills and social awareness. Particularly around the opposite sex.
There were...
I got bullied for a while. But when I put on 35 lbs in about sixteen months, at the end of junior high, that problem more or less took care of itself. My biggest problem in school was a complete lack of social skills and social awareness. Particularly around the opposite sex.
There were...
Damn. School wasn't great for me either most of the time, but... that sucks.
November 12, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Damn. School wasn't great for me either most of the time, but... that sucks.
Life... lemons... something... something.
November 11, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Life... lemons... something... something.
Must be cool to be able to detach your own hand. I guess the average human can technically do that too, but reattaching it would be quite the ordeal.
November 11, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Must be cool to be able to detach your own hand. I guess the average human can technically do that too, but reattaching it would be quite the ordeal.
That makes a lot of sense.
I've rarely engaged with those jokes because I love to write. Have since the beginning. My background is in animation. But in the hands of a master, the imagery and sensations evoked by the written word can far exceed any other medium, in my humble opinion.
I've rarely engaged with those jokes because I love to write. Have since the beginning. My background is in animation. But in the hands of a master, the imagery and sensations evoked by the written word can far exceed any other medium, in my humble opinion.
November 11, 2025 at 4:46 AM
That makes a lot of sense.
I've rarely engaged with those jokes because I love to write. Have since the beginning. My background is in animation. But in the hands of a master, the imagery and sensations evoked by the written word can far exceed any other medium, in my humble opinion.
I've rarely engaged with those jokes because I love to write. Have since the beginning. My background is in animation. But in the hands of a master, the imagery and sensations evoked by the written word can far exceed any other medium, in my humble opinion.
When I started writing seriously in 2006, and was a few chapters into my first (albeit terrible) novel-length manuscript, I joked with a friend, "I must be doing something wrong because this is a lot of fun."
November 11, 2025 at 4:33 AM
When I started writing seriously in 2006, and was a few chapters into my first (albeit terrible) novel-length manuscript, I joked with a friend, "I must be doing something wrong because this is a lot of fun."
He hasn't. He's only "stopped" one shot in the shootout this year so far, but that shot went wide. Every shot that's been on net has gone in.
It's baffling.
It's baffling.
November 8, 2025 at 8:28 PM
He hasn't. He's only "stopped" one shot in the shootout this year so far, but that shot went wide. Every shot that's been on net has gone in.
It's baffling.
It's baffling.
Silovs is really good during regular play, but in shootouts Muse would be better off putting one of these in goal.
November 8, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Silovs is really good during regular play, but in shootouts Muse would be better off putting one of these in goal.
Graves looks a lot better now than he did last year, or even in camp. It'd be hard for him to be worse, I guess. He could've only gone up. But at least for a couple periods he looks adequate. With Graves I'll take adequate.
November 8, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Graves looks a lot better now than he did last year, or even in camp. It'd be hard for him to be worse, I guess. He could've only gone up. But at least for a couple periods he looks adequate. With Graves I'll take adequate.
I'm just glad they went back to the Wildwing duck mask logo. Still looks better in eggplant and green, but they never asked for my input. 🤷🏻
That post Mighty Ducks black and gold wordmark jersey was one of the most bland, boring, and generic rebrands in sports history.
That post Mighty Ducks black and gold wordmark jersey was one of the most bland, boring, and generic rebrands in sports history.
November 7, 2025 at 3:36 AM
I'm just glad they went back to the Wildwing duck mask logo. Still looks better in eggplant and green, but they never asked for my input. 🤷🏻
That post Mighty Ducks black and gold wordmark jersey was one of the most bland, boring, and generic rebrands in sports history.
That post Mighty Ducks black and gold wordmark jersey was one of the most bland, boring, and generic rebrands in sports history.
Crosby looks like he might be able to play into his 50's like Gordie if he really felt like it.
November 7, 2025 at 3:11 AM
Crosby looks like he might be able to play into his 50's like Gordie if he really felt like it.