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astrophic.bsky.social
Cat
@astrophic.bsky.social
190 followers 110 following 4.6K posts
AuDHD. Sometimes I write. Can tie own shoelaces 9 times out of 10
🏳️‍🌈 🇵🇸

They/them

Alt text:
Cover photo: unicorn on hind legs surrounded by stars silhouetted against rainbow
Profile picture: drawing of a black and white kitten on shoulder
Posts Replies Media Videos
astrophic.bsky.social
A reverse image search threw up a set of four. Looks like it may be entirely an AI brainchild
Four cushions on a white sofa. Each cushion depicts a terrifying screaming goat. Pretty sure it's AI
November 24, 2025 at 10:25 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
My friend recreated that cake for my last birthday
A chocolate cake, with chocolate icing decorated to look like a monster who has looked into the abyss and the abyss looked back. Its chocolate button and white icing eyes stare traumatised into space. The piped pink mouth hangs open and individual teeth grimace. It has little ice cream cones for horns.
November 24, 2025 at 10:20 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
Why does my alcohol free beer have a drink aware warning?? It's 0.05% or less. I would have to drink 100 of them to have the equivalent of a single regular Heineken. 33 litres. 58 pints. I'd die of water toxicity. Is that the drink I need to be aware of?
The back of a green Heineken alcohol free lager bottle held in my hand. The text declares it to be (less than) 0.05% vol yet there is a QR code linking to an alcohol awareness website and a link to bedrinkaware.co.uk. why?
October 30, 2025 at 9:24 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
RIP Kurt Cobain you would have loved Tiktok shop
A screenshot from the tiktok shop. A truly grungy green, olive and black striped jumper with several holes and tears in it, it's cropped at the waist and has long, baggy sleeves. Text reads 'Proud Wildcat - visit shop. -39% £8.41 (crossed out £13.78 (3.98 shipping) (Plus Size) Striped Print Ripped Flounce Sleeve Crop Sweater, Casual Long Sleeve...
October 7, 2025 at 4:28 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
Has anyone run this past @notpodium.bsky.social
A dropped screenshot from Coral Island showing a shop item called 'Pufferfish Mini Podium' which in fact appears to be a lecturn on top of a podium, in blue and white
September 13, 2025 at 6:27 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
The reviews are in
A poster for Alien Earth. A Xenomorph, a smooth, muscled jet black humanoid sorta alien figure with a long tail and elongated head crouches over a yellow tank containing a smaller creature masked by condensation. A three star rating declares it to be 'solidly mid' while a two star rating states 'ah, it's aight'
August 22, 2025 at 3:22 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
I old
Poster for The Fast and The Furious (2001) ft Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster and Paul Walker looking moody at the top and a blurry speeding car at the bottom.
June 15, 2025 at 12:41 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
Watching S1-3 of Supernatural like
Head and shoulders photo of Misha Collins as Castiel, a 30-something white man with shaggy black hair and stubble wearing a collared shirt open at the neck and a beige trenchcoat. He is looking sort of intensely sadly at the camera. Caption reads 'feel like pure shit just want him back'
April 25, 2025 at 5:08 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
Final answer
Dr McCoy and Mr Spock from Star Trek (The Original Series). Both have dark hair with a half-fringe and pointy sideburns. McCoy is Human and Spock is Vulcan, visible in his high pointed tipped ears. Both wear blue long sleeved shirts with black collars and gold bands around the sleeve cuffs. Both have silver trek arrowheads on their right pecs. They're holding phaser guns and are exchanging a glance which seems to say 'welp'
March 12, 2025 at 9:10 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
IYKYK

(Pretty sure this is AI. I nicked it off a google search, it looks like shit, but the joke stands)
Two interlocked keyrings with a variety of yale-style keys threaded on to them. I nicked this from google search and its almost definitely AI generated because it looks like shit
March 8, 2025 at 11:04 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
A non binary person with short blonde hair grinning at the camera. There's a filter on the photo adding heavy but natural makeup and a moustache and goatee. I look like someone who'd sell you a used car then give you an STD
February 22, 2025 at 4:23 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
I don't know why people find this confusing
There's a lot of text in this image, a photo from a 1913 Pears Encyclopedia. My apologies for only including highlights below: "BRITISH WEIGHTS AND MEASURES Since January 1, 1826 there has been compulsory conformity of Weights and Measures." The first chart on the page reads: "AVOIRDUPOIS WEIGHT 27 11.30 grains make 1 dram 16 drams make 1 oz 16 oz make 1 pound 26 pounds make 1 quart 4 quarts make 1 hundredweight (cwt) 20 cwt make 1 ton This is the weight in common use in all trade dealings" Other charts on the page are: "TROY WEIGHT" including grains, carats and pennyweights; "APOTHECARIES' WEIGHT" Including scruples and drachms: "DRY MEASURE" Including gills, pints, pecks and bushels; "WINE AND SPIRIT MEASURE" including pints, hogsheads and puncheons; "MISCELLANEOUS LIQUID MEASURES" including hogsheads, pipes, American barrels and tuns; "LINEAL MEASURE" Including barleycorns (oh come on. They're making words up now), inches, feet, poles and yards; "MISCELLANEOUS MEASURES OF LENGTH" Including leagues, degrees, palms, paces and furlongs. It's a long and nearly entirely irrelevant conversion chart these days, but it's pretty cool. If you enjoyed this alt text and want to know more about the page please dm me 😅
February 20, 2025 at 11:05 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
I PICKLED
Two tall glass jars with gold lids, and a small plastic pot with an orange rimmed clip lid. The first jar contains pickled red onion, slices of red onion in a pink-stained vinegar solution. The second is pickled kale, green curly leaves packed into a green-stained vinegar solution. The pot contains pickled courgette ribbons, which you can't really see, but they're there. The jars sit on the grey mottled kitchen sideboard with white tiles in the background.
February 18, 2025 at 1:13 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
An idiot (me) wearing a long and very blonde wig with a baseball cap on top and large round sunglasses. I'm also wearing a black hoodie. I'm standing in front of a black curtain dotted with stars and narrow shelves full of different colours of nail polish.
February 7, 2025 at 11:23 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
This is so funny to me. Also relatable

pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC...
A snippet of white text on a black background reading as follows: 'In Study 1, participants were randomly assigned to a pain or non-pain condition and their consumption of cheesecake was measured. Participants ate more cheesecake (a sweet-tasting food) following a painful experience than a non-painful one'
February 7, 2025 at 10:36 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
Check yourself before you wreck yourself
A close up of some text on a candy bar wrapper. The background is cream coloured with purple and green blobs and the text reads: 'Storage advice Store cool and dry Look! Smell! Taste! Before you waste Best before end See under fin seal'
February 7, 2025 at 1:26 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
It's not a meme but more people should know
A screenshot from a tiktok ad. A lady in a baggy pink tshirt and sweats holda up a weird hanger- a long strip with individual rods each of which has a pair of pants (trousers) hung over. The caption reads 'Finally a hanger for PANTS'. Additional but irrelevant info: The shop link reads 'buy before they're gone' The account posting is 'Olivia' The post description reads 'FINALLY space saving hangers for pants! 🙌🙌🙌' The screenshot was accidentally timed so the lady has her eyes closed but her mouth hanging open
January 12, 2025 at 4:58 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
This is my dinner. I have had this for dinner many times during my life. Yet it took 36 years to get diagnosed with autism
A bowl full of delicious looking crispy golden roast potatoes
January 4, 2025 at 2:25 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
Reposting this with alt text. In the time it took me to write the alt text I forgot the original poster. It seems the author is Instachaaz
A two-column chart. The heading reads: "Googling stuff..." Column one reads: "...Then Search results: The thing you want." Column two reads: "...Now Search results: AI taking a wild stab at it with some blatant misinformation Sponsored result Sponsored result Sponsored result Sponsored result People also ask: (blank lines denoting other things people ask) View products (Empty boxes denoting products for sale)" "©️instachaaz"
December 29, 2024 at 12:38 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
My energy going into 2025
A screenshot from Tiktok account 'Chinese with Gina'. The creator is pointing to a sheet with phrases in Chinese and English. The english phrase she is translating is 'I want to die'
December 27, 2024 at 8:16 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
Thanks Sainsburys that's the same
A screenshot of a substitution note from my grocery order. They have substituted 600g of parsnips in honey mustard sauce for 400g of cauliflower cheese
December 24, 2024 at 7:07 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
Not challenging whatsoever. I definitely drew this.
I did not draw this. It is in fact a screenshot from the 2004 hit 'JCB song' by Nizlopi. It features a very simple cartoon drawing on lined paper of a big yellow JCB tractor type vehicle on two small wheels with large mechanical scoops at the front and back and 'JCB' scrawled on the front. Inside a little child looks out towards the camera while his Dad drives with a big smile. Dad wears a yellow safety helmet.
December 19, 2024 at 12:56 AM
astrophic.bsky.social
A gif from Schitt's Creek. Chris Elliot as Roland Schitt, a man with a blonde mullet and beard, winks at someone offscreen. He wears a scruffy old trucker cap, and an oversized blue sweater over a baggy grey tshirt.
December 9, 2024 at 6:50 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
Quote posting with alt text:
A cartoon. Text at the top reads "Next time a conspiracy theorist tries to tell you 'what really happened', present a more outlandish theory and accuse them of covering up the truth" The cartoon depicts two ladies wearing old fashioned clothes, one is saying to the other 'The moon landing was faked!' The other lady has a disdainful expression and is saying 'Pfft, you believe in the moon?'
December 7, 2024 at 9:40 PM
astrophic.bsky.social
*snort* I'll take it
From blueskyroast.com
My bluesky roast from blueskyroast.com. it reads as follows: Cat: The Pro-Palestine Meme Machine of Bluesky A delightful mix of poignant insights and chaotic humor, leaving followers both enlightened and confused. "Like a rainbow unicorn at a protest, Cat blends warmth with unapologetic sass." 87% authenticity 80% thought leader Key topics 95% social issues 90% media commentary
December 4, 2024 at 11:30 AM