posting before anyone says "a COUPLE decades???" and makes a very cool face while their bowtie spins around

they haven't made the world too cruel for kindness, they just desperately need you to think they have

we've taken the community feedback on board, and in the next patch paul dano will be rebalanced to better evasion tank, commensurate to his ability to pull aggro. we're also introducing a secondary currency that will drop rarely from maxed out wells called "super oil" so look out for that

EDF: here's a new shotgun, shoots a huge energy orb

ME: that's cool

EDF: haha no. this is included as a joke. idiot. now this gun shoots out 500,000 homing lightning bullets in 0.1 seconds

ME: now that's GOT to be good

EDF: don't be so stupid please. alright here's just a normal cordless drill

(me being harmed by the system withdrawing its minimal grace) you know, you gotta hand it to The System

the Make Some Noise prompt that kills Dropout

damn at least Charly got to perceive for a little while first

it's truly amazing how independent you are sir. it's like, here comes the airplane, ok, and *you* decide whether or not to open wide or just spit up a little. and it's always the right call. incredible.

just you wait until i get a solid weekend to think hard about what would be a funny thing to say. then we'll see who's clever

ah but you can just filter the dead bugs out,

winner of the "Not Wrong" Award