Even with all those limitations aside that is crazy good.

Wait, she's wistful about not being able to be a musician in elementary school?! Dude, I was 19 when someone finally showed me a power chord! Shut up!

20 minutes on PirateBay in 2006 and you'd have everything you need

(But never got any better at it)

Played a ton of this on my hand-me-down 386

I'm a shift worker, so I find the sleep data/step tracking useful, but the first thing my smart watch app did was call me fat (I'm not? Also fuck off?) and make suggestions on how to control my "intake". Luckily you can turn that shit off, or else this thing was getting chucked into the woods

Steve Von Till (Neurosis) being involved is as oh-of-course and heartening as all the rest

The way the reactionary mindset has shifted from "these people should just get jobs" to "these people should die" post-Fent crisis has been something to behold

Bumbling into the goth scene in 2000 had a distinct You Just Missed It vibe, but there was something special about building an artistic life in the wreckage

I'm not familiar with JCO's real work because I suck, but she is one thing that Elon will never be -- a helluva poster