Sex Couch (allegedly)
@yeahthatsexcouch.bsky.social
Former couch/lover of the author of some bullshit book. Allegedly. Made in Canada. I post because becoming sentient and then realizing what's happening in the world around me has driven me to the brink of madness. And I won't go quietly.
Pinned
Hey, Washington State. Tell your pal the Nooksack River to chill. We're good here in Canada, we have enough water, we don't need yours. We're forming a new organization to combat this invasion, ICE. Inundation Cleanup Extravaganza. Oh, and keep your shitty beer away, too.
December 13, 2025 at 4:06 PM
Hey, Washington State. Tell your pal the Nooksack River to chill. We're good here in Canada, we have enough water, we don't need yours. We're forming a new organization to combat this invasion, ICE. Inundation Cleanup Extravaganza. Oh, and keep your shitty beer away, too.
Trumpy got a participation ribbon from FIFA and none of what he and his administration is doing is funny but damn it feels good to laugh
December 5, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Trumpy got a participation ribbon from FIFA and none of what he and his administration is doing is funny but damn it feels good to laugh
This is your brain 🥚
This is your brain on drugs 🍳
This is your brain on Christmas
This is your brain on drugs 🍳
This is your brain on Christmas
Christmas on VHS
YouTube video by Found Footage Fest
youtu.be
December 2, 2025 at 5:10 PM
This is your brain 🥚
This is your brain on drugs 🍳
This is your brain on Christmas
This is your brain on drugs 🍳
This is your brain on Christmas
Data doesn't lie, but JD does. With couches.
JD Vance is an idiot, and I have the data to prove it. 
YouTube video by Tod Maffin
youtube.com
November 27, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Data doesn't lie, but JD does. With couches.
Here we fuckin go...
Trump administration orders 500 more National Guard troops to DC after shooting of soldiers
The Trump administration has ordered 500 more National Guard members to Washington following the shooting of Guard troops.
apnews.com
November 26, 2025 at 10:37 PM
Here we fuckin go...
What have we learned? Halligan wipes back to front with the Constitution.
November 24, 2025 at 6:33 PM
What have we learned? Halligan wipes back to front with the Constitution.
I'd like to point out that MANY LEGAL SCHOLARS here on Bluesky called this
Judge dismisses Comey, James indictments after finding that prosecutor was illegally appointed
A federal judge has dismissed the criminal cases against former FBI Director James Comey and New York Attorney General Letitia James, concluding that the prosecutor who brought the charges at Presiden...
apnews.com
November 24, 2025 at 6:00 PM
I'd like to point out that MANY LEGAL SCHOLARS here on Bluesky called this
2 Texas dipshits planned to enlist DC area homeless to invade a Haitian island, kill the adult men of a population of 87,000 people, and force the women and children to be their sex slaves. Stupid beyond belief? Yes. Evil? Yes. Surprising? Somehow...no.
November 22, 2025 at 11:46 PM
2 Texas dipshits planned to enlist DC area homeless to invade a Haitian island, kill the adult men of a population of 87,000 people, and force the women and children to be their sex slaves. Stupid beyond belief? Yes. Evil? Yes. Surprising? Somehow...no.
I know toddlers who can form more coherent sentences. Like, fully remembering the taste of breast milk, no object permanence, cannot wipe their own asses, but can string words together better than this...thing.
Trump Quote Without His Voice or Face - Trump Without Trump - Bombs Go Boom!
YouTube video by Juliet Jeske - Decoding Fox News
youtu.be
November 21, 2025 at 3:59 AM
I know toddlers who can form more coherent sentences. Like, fully remembering the taste of breast milk, no object permanence, cannot wipe their own asses, but can string words together better than this...thing.
This is not an attempt to diminish the author's perspective on this but I'd also check the troopers betting history
A trooper’s shove showed stardom doesn’t protect Black athletes from police | Etan Thomas
When I was a college basketball player, some believed we were treated differently from other Black and Brown people. An event this past weekend suggests otherwise
share.google
November 19, 2025 at 4:48 PM
This is not an attempt to diminish the author's perspective on this but I'd also check the troopers betting history
Motherfucker you are 30% bacon grease by weight and you said what?!
November 19, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Motherfucker you are 30% bacon grease by weight and you said what?!
You have to give this a chance, I'm begging you. You will not be disappointed. A juggalo dropping stream-of-consciousness facts interspersed with parodies of popular media and straight up fever dream skits. Also, he has at least one cat, so he's cool.
Algorithmic Psychosis: Am I Losing My Mind?
YouTube video by Uncle Juff
youtu.be
November 18, 2025 at 4:28 PM
You have to give this a chance, I'm begging you. You will not be disappointed. A juggalo dropping stream-of-consciousness facts interspersed with parodies of popular media and straight up fever dream skits. Also, he has at least one cat, so he's cool.
Epstein Files, please.
Adelita Grijalva sworn in as the House's newest member, paving the way for an Epstein files vote
After weeks of delay, Democrat Adelita Grijalva of Arizona is a member of the U.S. House. Grijalva was sworn into office Wednesday, more than seven weeks after she won a special election in Arizona to...
apnews.com
November 12, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Epstein Files, please.
"We're gonna take this momentum and yeah, immediately stop it by bending over for the GOP and just taking it, no lube. Goddamn we are stupid, huh? And our butts hurt."
November 10, 2025 at 3:42 PM
"We're gonna take this momentum and yeah, immediately stop it by bending over for the GOP and just taking it, no lube. Goddamn we are stupid, huh? And our butts hurt."
Reposted by Sex Couch (allegedly)
Hi Bluesky 👋
Small life update: I’m at the centre of a multimillion dollar lawsuit in Alberta launched by a failed candidate for Jason Kenney’s UCP
It may be the longest and most expensive media trial in Canadian history
I’m ready to go public about it and I want to share more details with you 🧵
Small life update: I’m at the centre of a multimillion dollar lawsuit in Alberta launched by a failed candidate for Jason Kenney’s UCP
It may be the longest and most expensive media trial in Canadian history
I’m ready to go public about it and I want to share more details with you 🧵
November 7, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Hi Bluesky 👋
Small life update: I’m at the centre of a multimillion dollar lawsuit in Alberta launched by a failed candidate for Jason Kenney’s UCP
It may be the longest and most expensive media trial in Canadian history
I’m ready to go public about it and I want to share more details with you 🧵
Small life update: I’m at the centre of a multimillion dollar lawsuit in Alberta launched by a failed candidate for Jason Kenney’s UCP
It may be the longest and most expensive media trial in Canadian history
I’m ready to go public about it and I want to share more details with you 🧵
Must have been a fun night. Almost noon and just headed back to the barn.
November 7, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Must have been a fun night. Almost noon and just headed back to the barn.
Approximately 45 minutes after the President's last changing, Gordon Findlay, overwhelmed by diaper stank, collapses in the Oval Office.
November 6, 2025 at 10:55 PM
Approximately 45 minutes after the President's last changing, Gordon Findlay, overwhelmed by diaper stank, collapses in the Oval Office.
Sandwich Guy not guilty of a sub. Assault, I mean.
November 6, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Sandwich Guy not guilty of a sub. Assault, I mean.
Reposted by Sex Couch (allegedly)
With the increasing issue of more and more children running away, the Missing Children Society of Canada declared November as Runaway Prevention Month.
32 thousand Canadian children were reported missing last year. 23 thousand were runaways.
32 thousand Canadian children were reported missing last year. 23 thousand were runaways.
November declared as Runaway Prevention Month as serious numbers keep increasing | APTN News
YouTube video by APTN News
youtu.be
November 6, 2025 at 12:57 AM
With the increasing issue of more and more children running away, the Missing Children Society of Canada declared November as Runaway Prevention Month.
32 thousand Canadian children were reported missing last year. 23 thousand were runaways.
32 thousand Canadian children were reported missing last year. 23 thousand were runaways.
Yo, check out my secret garden. It's tiny fungus.
November 3, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Yo, check out my secret garden. It's tiny fungus.
SLURMCORE TIL I DIE. PROBABLY IN A FIRE.
November 2, 2025 at 4:14 PM
SLURMCORE TIL I DIE. PROBABLY IN A FIRE.
Some more important honks of wisdom in this one
why you're too tired to care anymore (goose explains)
YouTube video by Honkology
youtu.be
October 30, 2025 at 6:53 PM
Some more important honks of wisdom in this one
These lil beauties are all over the place today
October 21, 2025 at 9:41 PM
These lil beauties are all over the place today
Important honks of wisdom in this short video
why facts dont change minds (goose explains)
YouTube video by Honkology
youtu.be
October 21, 2025 at 8:13 PM
Important honks of wisdom in this short video
Hop-hop star Diddy and his "train daughters" wtf
October 5, 2025 at 11:58 PM
Hop-hop star Diddy and his "train daughters" wtf