WulfHelm
@wulfhelm.bsky.social
Bretwalda of the Angli.
Generous host of the Mead Hall
Lord of Wülferhampton.
Please use your Gods responsibly.
Hinc videre possum domum tuam.
Generous host of the Mead Hall
Lord of Wülferhampton.
Please use your Gods responsibly.
Hinc videre possum domum tuam.
Pinned
WulfHelm
@wulfhelm.bsky.social
· Mar 14
The sun will rise in the East tomorrow.
Your attendance is not required.
It would be nice if you were there though.
Your attendance is not required.
It would be nice if you were there though.
Reposted by WulfHelm
When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom....
November 28, 2025 at 9:06 PM
When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom....
Statement from the Office of the Bretwalda.
Having reviewed Wülferhampton's immigration policy your Bretwalda is comfortable that anyone who needs a home and safe place is welcome* in Wülferhampton.
*terms and conditions apply.
Having reviewed Wülferhampton's immigration policy your Bretwalda is comfortable that anyone who needs a home and safe place is welcome* in Wülferhampton.
*terms and conditions apply.
November 28, 2025 at 8:48 PM
Statement from the Office of the Bretwalda.
Having reviewed Wülferhampton's immigration policy your Bretwalda is comfortable that anyone who needs a home and safe place is welcome* in Wülferhampton.
*terms and conditions apply.
Having reviewed Wülferhampton's immigration policy your Bretwalda is comfortable that anyone who needs a home and safe place is welcome* in Wülferhampton.
*terms and conditions apply.
Tonight's future presentation, subject as ever to approval by @colken.bsky.social, stars Hamish Mcbeth and lieutenant Ed Exley in a Master Chef challenge FROM HELL!
a man in a suit is screaming with his mouth open .
ALT: a man in a suit is screaming with his mouth open .
media.tenor.com
November 28, 2025 at 7:50 PM
Tonight's future presentation, subject as ever to approval by @colken.bsky.social, stars Hamish Mcbeth and lieutenant Ed Exley in a Master Chef challenge FROM HELL!
Countless needles deaths on his account and the glad handing sack of shit feels safe to opine behind his pay wall.
Never mind.
His time will come.
Never mind.
His time will come.
November 28, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Countless needles deaths on his account and the glad handing sack of shit feels safe to opine behind his pay wall.
Never mind.
His time will come.
Never mind.
His time will come.
M'Lady B may have accidentally ordered the CHINESE FOODS twice.
a man with a mustache wearing a green beret and a green shirt .
ALT: a man with a mustache wearing a green beret and a green shirt .
media.tenor.com
November 28, 2025 at 6:55 PM
M'Lady B may have accidentally ordered the CHINESE FOODS twice.
The Attack Womble of Death is booked into the vets for a dental on Monday.
I've warned them, but they seem blithely unconcerned.
Remember.
I. HAVE. WARNED. THEM.
I've warned them, but they seem blithely unconcerned.
Remember.
I. HAVE. WARNED. THEM.
a man in a red shirt is smiling and saying oh yes there will be blood
ALT: a man in a red shirt is smiling and saying oh yes there will be blood
media.tenor.com
November 28, 2025 at 6:52 PM
The Attack Womble of Death is booked into the vets for a dental on Monday.
I've warned them, but they seem blithely unconcerned.
Remember.
I. HAVE. WARNED. THEM.
I've warned them, but they seem blithely unconcerned.
Remember.
I. HAVE. WARNED. THEM.
November 28, 2025 at 6:15 PM
Tonight on the Mead Hall menu (top table only) THE CHINESE FOODS!
Lower. Spam szechuan.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Almost unused cat litter.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
Lower. Spam szechuan.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Almost unused cat litter.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
November 28, 2025 at 6:09 PM
Tonight on the Mead Hall menu (top table only) THE CHINESE FOODS!
Lower. Spam szechuan.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Almost unused cat litter.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
Lower. Spam szechuan.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Almost unused cat litter.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
The Rookie.
Episode 237, 914, 832, 157.
Part two.
Nathan Fillion, having unwittingly given fire to humanity, attempts to bust Prometheus out of a Greek high security prison.
Episode 237, 914, 832, 157.
Part two.
Nathan Fillion, having unwittingly given fire to humanity, attempts to bust Prometheus out of a Greek high security prison.
November 28, 2025 at 5:34 PM
The Rookie.
Episode 237, 914, 832, 157.
Part two.
Nathan Fillion, having unwittingly given fire to humanity, attempts to bust Prometheus out of a Greek high security prison.
Episode 237, 914, 832, 157.
Part two.
Nathan Fillion, having unwittingly given fire to humanity, attempts to bust Prometheus out of a Greek high security prison.
This week, Mr Pip has barked at
Revere collars
Spandrels
Riboflavin
A dark man fleeing across a desert
Chaka Demus but not Pliers
The Partridge Family
Gonks
Inkwells
Stratocumului
Blarting
Thumbs
Barn conversions
Kevin the Chaffinch
Sommeliers
Bud light
and
Renfrewshire
Revere collars
Spandrels
Riboflavin
A dark man fleeing across a desert
Chaka Demus but not Pliers
The Partridge Family
Gonks
Inkwells
Stratocumului
Blarting
Thumbs
Barn conversions
Kevin the Chaffinch
Sommeliers
Bud light
and
Renfrewshire
November 28, 2025 at 5:23 PM
This week, Mr Pip has barked at
Revere collars
Spandrels
Riboflavin
A dark man fleeing across a desert
Chaka Demus but not Pliers
The Partridge Family
Gonks
Inkwells
Stratocumului
Blarting
Thumbs
Barn conversions
Kevin the Chaffinch
Sommeliers
Bud light
and
Renfrewshire
Revere collars
Spandrels
Riboflavin
A dark man fleeing across a desert
Chaka Demus but not Pliers
The Partridge Family
Gonks
Inkwells
Stratocumului
Blarting
Thumbs
Barn conversions
Kevin the Chaffinch
Sommeliers
Bud light
and
Renfrewshire
@wulfhelm.bsky.social may I present you with this offering my Lord. Behold! Tis an egret! #shitbirdphotos
November 28, 2025 at 2:16 PM
Big Bob the Bastard approves this message.
November 28, 2025 at 8:27 AM
Big Bob the Bastard approves this message.
Reposted by WulfHelm
And to you too, Hattie. 😘
November 28, 2025 at 8:20 AM
And to you too, Hattie. 😘
A very happy #FuckOffFriday to one and all.
November 28, 2025 at 8:14 AM
A very happy #FuckOffFriday to one and all.
I was absolutely honest with the nurse today when she asked about my alcohol consumption.
18 units.
Is it my fault that she failed to ask over what time period?
18 units.
Is it my fault that she failed to ask over what time period?
November 27, 2025 at 9:05 PM
I was absolutely honest with the nurse today when she asked about my alcohol consumption.
18 units.
Is it my fault that she failed to ask over what time period?
18 units.
Is it my fault that she failed to ask over what time period?
Tonight's future presentation, subject as ever to approval by @colken.bsky.social, stars a liquid eyed bridge player, an Andalusian hick, a tabernacle, some Latin egregiously subtitled as Greek, the Angel of Death and a redhead called Angus.
November 27, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Tonight's future presentation, subject as ever to approval by @colken.bsky.social, stars a liquid eyed bridge player, an Andalusian hick, a tabernacle, some Latin egregiously subtitled as Greek, the Angel of Death and a redhead called Angus.
Apologies.
Episode 1.
Again.
Episode 1.
Again.
Once upon a time, long, long ago, on a distant universe, called Scotland...
November 27, 2025 at 8:47 PM
Apologies.
Episode 1.
Again.
Episode 1.
Again.
Knees have a shelf life.
WHY. WAS. I. NOT. INFORMED. SOONER?
WHY. WAS. I. NOT. INFORMED. SOONER?
November 27, 2025 at 8:46 PM
Knees have a shelf life.
WHY. WAS. I. NOT. INFORMED. SOONER?
WHY. WAS. I. NOT. INFORMED. SOONER?
Tonight on the Mead Hall menu (top table only) cheese n bacon wrapped burgers inna bun/s with caramelised onions and seasoned wedgies.
Lower tables. Spman n spam wrapped spam with uncaramelised spam and spam.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Bakelite.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
Lower tables. Spman n spam wrapped spam with uncaramelised spam and spam.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Bakelite.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
November 27, 2025 at 8:41 PM
Tonight on the Mead Hall menu (top table only) cheese n bacon wrapped burgers inna bun/s with caramelised onions and seasoned wedgies.
Lower tables. Spman n spam wrapped spam with uncaramelised spam and spam.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Bakelite.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.
Lower tables. Spman n spam wrapped spam with uncaramelised spam and spam.
Vegetarian/vegan option. Bakelite.
Scraps and scrapings by the leper gate as ever.