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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park
@wonderpark.bsky.social
2K followers 7.7K following 330 posts
Welcome to Wonder Park! The best amusement park 35 minutes too far from you. Wonder Park; Half the Magic, Double the Price. Hush-Hush Sightings: https://shorturl.at/9X96b
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · Mar 29
Under new management! Which is the same management two managements ago. Either way, WE’RE BACK BITCHES!
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 10h
Maybe like a petting zoo where guests can interact with employees in their natural habitat…
wonderpark.bsky.social Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 13h
Brainstorming ways to turn the employee break room into a ride…
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 13h
Brainstorming ways to turn the employee break room into a ride…
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 1d
Still valid. Does not include tip or gratuity though.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 1d
Chiropractor’s office is opening up inside the gift shop of The Backbreaker Rollercoaster
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 1d
Unaffiliated
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 1d
Mr. Schmodes Wild Ride is currently closed for reasons we legally cannot express.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 2d
It’s called surge pricing Susan!
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 2d
Please do not eat the decorative funnel cakes.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 3d
Yeah like that, but with children inside.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 3d
To the “No Kings” protestors outside the park, our mascot King Wonder is a fictional mascot. He’s just a 17 year old dude in a costume making $7.25/hr. Chill.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 4d
Look, we didn’t know they were going to use weapons grade lasers.
spikeddoormat.bsky.social Spiked Doormat @spikeddoormat.bsky.social · 4d
Maybe hiring bored military scientists to calibrate the lasers might have been ill advised.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 4d
Due to technical issues the Laser Tag Area is now the Tag Arena.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 4d
crud
greenevillezoo.bsky.social Greeneville Zoo @greenevillezoo.bsky.social · 4d
To the owner of a gigantic wooden horse left outside our gate: we’re not falling for it. If you want in, buy a ticket like everyone else.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 5d
When the number of rides broken down exceeds 50% in a day we bust out the Apology Parade (unless that’s part of the 50%, then we bust out the Apology Deep Fried Mayo Cubes)
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 6d
The buffet and bathroom lines are consistently the longest in the park. Not sure how to fix.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 7d
went to mayo cubes. it always goes to mayo cubes.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 7d
Who’s paying for it?
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 7d
We will be open on Halloween and handing out candy. And by handing out we mean we’re going to throw it at you as you zip by on the rollercoaster. Whatever you catch in your mouth you can keep.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 10d
Don’t be the reason we have to make an announcement over the park speakers.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 11d
Concert on the Main Street Stage brought to you by Ozempic located next to the Main Street Fountain brought to you by Surge.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 12d
Wanna see some crazy shit? Come wander the park during a full moon.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 12d
Have you signed up for our Wonder Card yet? It entitles you to such perks as:
• 1st in line(for the bathrooms)
• Extra mayo cube each order
• Meet & Greet with Hush-Hush(wouldn’t recommend)
• Speed dating with our single team members
• And more! (ish)

Get yours at the Guest Info Desk today!
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 14d
Guess you gotta start with inappropriate emails before moving on to writing Shakespeare…
wonderpark.bsky.social Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 14d
Somehow the BDSM Monkeys logged into our email system and started sending threatening emails to all our guests. If you got one please ignore.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 14d
Somehow the BDSM Monkeys logged into our email system and started sending threatening emails to all our guests. If you got one please ignore.
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wonderpark.bsky.social
Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 16d
WTF is wrong with you people?! It’s the Break Dancing Silly Monkeys Show (BDSM). Y’all should be ashamed. This is a FAMILY park.
wonderpark.bsky.social Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 16d
The BDSM Show is canceled until someone returns the sack of bananas they stole from backstage.
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