twoodcc
@twoodcc.bsky.social
Technology, sports, random facts, and dad jokes
Why didn’t the blind man eat fish?
Because he couldn’t sea food
Because he couldn’t sea food
December 13, 2025 at 5:34 PM
Why didn’t the blind man eat fish?
Because he couldn’t sea food
Because he couldn’t sea food
35-point games after turning 30:
94 — Steph Curry
93 — Michael Jordan
The only players with more than 85.
94 — Steph Curry
93 — Michael Jordan
The only players with more than 85.
December 13, 2025 at 2:34 PM
35-point games after turning 30:
94 — Steph Curry
93 — Michael Jordan
The only players with more than 85.
94 — Steph Curry
93 — Michael Jordan
The only players with more than 85.
🇯🇵 The oldest people to ever reach the summit of Mount Everest were both from Japan.
The oldest man was Yuichiro Miura, who reached the summit on 23 May 2013 at the age of 80y and 223d.
The oldest woman was Tamae Watanabe, who reached the summit on 19 May 2012 at the age of 73y and 180d.
The oldest man was Yuichiro Miura, who reached the summit on 23 May 2013 at the age of 80y and 223d.
The oldest woman was Tamae Watanabe, who reached the summit on 19 May 2012 at the age of 73y and 180d.
December 13, 2025 at 3:12 AM
🇯🇵 The oldest people to ever reach the summit of Mount Everest were both from Japan.
The oldest man was Yuichiro Miura, who reached the summit on 23 May 2013 at the age of 80y and 223d.
The oldest woman was Tamae Watanabe, who reached the summit on 19 May 2012 at the age of 73y and 180d.
The oldest man was Yuichiro Miura, who reached the summit on 23 May 2013 at the age of 80y and 223d.
The oldest woman was Tamae Watanabe, who reached the summit on 19 May 2012 at the age of 73y and 180d.
“Hey waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!”
“Yes, sir. It’s fresh ground”
“Yes, sir. It’s fresh ground”
December 12, 2025 at 3:53 AM
“Hey waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!”
“Yes, sir. It’s fresh ground”
“Yes, sir. It’s fresh ground”
Browns-Bears game in Chicago is expected to be one of the coolest games in Soldier Field history.
If you're going to the game, wear a jacket... or two. 🥶
If you're going to the game, wear a jacket... or two. 🥶
December 11, 2025 at 4:17 AM
Browns-Bears game in Chicago is expected to be one of the coolest games in Soldier Field history.
If you're going to the game, wear a jacket... or two. 🥶
If you're going to the game, wear a jacket... or two. 🥶
Most 1st downs or TD on 3rd down this season...
1. Justin Herbert - 69
2. Josh Allen - 61
2. Bo Nix - 61
4. Dak Prescott - 60
5. Jordan Love - 56
5. Drake Maye - 56
7. Caleb Williams - 55
8. Trevor Lawrence - 51
1. Justin Herbert - 69
2. Josh Allen - 61
2. Bo Nix - 61
4. Dak Prescott - 60
5. Jordan Love - 56
5. Drake Maye - 56
7. Caleb Williams - 55
8. Trevor Lawrence - 51
December 11, 2025 at 4:14 AM
Most 1st downs or TD on 3rd down this season...
1. Justin Herbert - 69
2. Josh Allen - 61
2. Bo Nix - 61
4. Dak Prescott - 60
5. Jordan Love - 56
5. Drake Maye - 56
7. Caleb Williams - 55
8. Trevor Lawrence - 51
1. Justin Herbert - 69
2. Josh Allen - 61
2. Bo Nix - 61
4. Dak Prescott - 60
5. Jordan Love - 56
5. Drake Maye - 56
7. Caleb Williams - 55
8. Trevor Lawrence - 51
Astronauts use Linux because you can’t open windows in space.
December 11, 2025 at 3:41 AM
Astronauts use Linux because you can’t open windows in space.
TWO TIPS FOR CHRISTMAS:
1. Forget the past.
You can't change it.
2. Forget the present
I didn't get you one.
1. Forget the past.
You can't change it.
2. Forget the present
I didn't get you one.
December 11, 2025 at 3:36 AM
TWO TIPS FOR CHRISTMAS:
1. Forget the past.
You can't change it.
2. Forget the present
I didn't get you one.
1. Forget the past.
You can't change it.
2. Forget the present
I didn't get you one.
Most tackles on offensive plays this season...
5 - Ja'Marr Chase (CIN)
5 - Jalen Nailor (MIN)
4 - DK Metcalf (PIT)
4 - Michael Mayer (LV)
5 - Ja'Marr Chase (CIN)
5 - Jalen Nailor (MIN)
4 - DK Metcalf (PIT)
4 - Michael Mayer (LV)
December 10, 2025 at 11:38 PM
Most tackles on offensive plays this season...
5 - Ja'Marr Chase (CIN)
5 - Jalen Nailor (MIN)
4 - DK Metcalf (PIT)
4 - Michael Mayer (LV)
5 - Ja'Marr Chase (CIN)
5 - Jalen Nailor (MIN)
4 - DK Metcalf (PIT)
4 - Michael Mayer (LV)
What do you call Santa without a GPS?
A lost Claus...
A lost Claus...
December 10, 2025 at 7:28 PM
What do you call Santa without a GPS?
A lost Claus...
A lost Claus...
Frank Sinatra weighted 13.5 pounds (6.1 kg) at birth.
He was so large he had to be delivered with forceps. In the process, he was left with scarring on his left cheek, ear, and neck, and had lifelong damage to his left eardrum.
He was so large he had to be delivered with forceps. In the process, he was left with scarring on his left cheek, ear, and neck, and had lifelong damage to his left eardrum.
December 10, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Frank Sinatra weighted 13.5 pounds (6.1 kg) at birth.
He was so large he had to be delivered with forceps. In the process, he was left with scarring on his left cheek, ear, and neck, and had lifelong damage to his left eardrum.
He was so large he had to be delivered with forceps. In the process, he was left with scarring on his left cheek, ear, and neck, and had lifelong damage to his left eardrum.
Why did the chicken lay its egg on an axe?
To hatchet
To hatchet
December 10, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Why did the chicken lay its egg on an axe?
To hatchet
To hatchet
Philip Rivers could be the 5th QB in NFL history to start a game at age 44 or older, joining Tom Brady, Vinny Testaverde, Steve DeBerg and Warren Moon
December 10, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Philip Rivers could be the 5th QB in NFL history to start a game at age 44 or older, joining Tom Brady, Vinny Testaverde, Steve DeBerg and Warren Moon
Justin Herbert has been sacked 6+ times in 3 games in his career.
He is 3-0 in those games.
Those 3 wins are the most by any QB since he entered the NFL in 2020.
He is 3-0 in those games.
Those 3 wins are the most by any QB since he entered the NFL in 2020.
December 9, 2025 at 12:43 PM
Justin Herbert has been sacked 6+ times in 3 games in his career.
He is 3-0 in those games.
Those 3 wins are the most by any QB since he entered the NFL in 2020.
He is 3-0 in those games.
Those 3 wins are the most by any QB since he entered the NFL in 2020.
In the last 20 seasons, quarterbacks who:
- Completed under 50 percent of their passes
- Had fewer than 150 passing yards
- Were sacked 7+ times
Were 0-14. Justin Herbert is the first such QB to win since Charlie Batch in 2000 against the Buccaneers
- Completed under 50 percent of their passes
- Had fewer than 150 passing yards
- Were sacked 7+ times
Were 0-14. Justin Herbert is the first such QB to win since Charlie Batch in 2000 against the Buccaneers
December 9, 2025 at 12:09 PM
In the last 20 seasons, quarterbacks who:
- Completed under 50 percent of their passes
- Had fewer than 150 passing yards
- Were sacked 7+ times
Were 0-14. Justin Herbert is the first such QB to win since Charlie Batch in 2000 against the Buccaneers
- Completed under 50 percent of their passes
- Had fewer than 150 passing yards
- Were sacked 7+ times
Were 0-14. Justin Herbert is the first such QB to win since Charlie Batch in 2000 against the Buccaneers
Super Bowl LIX Starting QB in Week 14...
Patrick Mahomes on SNF vs HOU
- 0 pass TD, 3 INT, 19.8 passer rating (career low)
Jalen Hurts on MNF at LAC
- 0 pass TD, 4 INT (career high), 31.2 passer rating
Passer rating if they spiked the ball every play: 39.6
Patrick Mahomes on SNF vs HOU
- 0 pass TD, 3 INT, 19.8 passer rating (career low)
Jalen Hurts on MNF at LAC
- 0 pass TD, 4 INT (career high), 31.2 passer rating
Passer rating if they spiked the ball every play: 39.6
December 9, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Super Bowl LIX Starting QB in Week 14...
Patrick Mahomes on SNF vs HOU
- 0 pass TD, 3 INT, 19.8 passer rating (career low)
Jalen Hurts on MNF at LAC
- 0 pass TD, 4 INT (career high), 31.2 passer rating
Passer rating if they spiked the ball every play: 39.6
Patrick Mahomes on SNF vs HOU
- 0 pass TD, 3 INT, 19.8 passer rating (career low)
Jalen Hurts on MNF at LAC
- 0 pass TD, 4 INT (career high), 31.2 passer rating
Passer rating if they spiked the ball every play: 39.6
That was the 15th rush touchdown of 50+ yards in Saquon Barkley's career, tied for the second-most all-time
Most rush TD of 50+ yards, including playoffs:
16 - Adrian Peterson
15 - Saquon Barkley
15 - Barry Sanders
Most rush TD of 50+ yards, including playoffs:
16 - Adrian Peterson
15 - Saquon Barkley
15 - Barry Sanders
December 9, 2025 at 11:54 AM
That was the 15th rush touchdown of 50+ yards in Saquon Barkley's career, tied for the second-most all-time
Most rush TD of 50+ yards, including playoffs:
16 - Adrian Peterson
15 - Saquon Barkley
15 - Barry Sanders
Most rush TD of 50+ yards, including playoffs:
16 - Adrian Peterson
15 - Saquon Barkley
15 - Barry Sanders
Philip Rivers is (currently) 1 of 4 players in NFL history whose last NFL game was a 300+ yard passing performance in the playoffs:
Tom Brady in 2022 Wild Card Round
Philip Rivers in 2020 Wild Card Round
John Elway in Super Bowl XXXIII
Joe Montana in 1994 Wild Card Round
Tom Brady in 2022 Wild Card Round
Philip Rivers in 2020 Wild Card Round
John Elway in Super Bowl XXXIII
Joe Montana in 1994 Wild Card Round
December 9, 2025 at 4:19 AM
Philip Rivers is (currently) 1 of 4 players in NFL history whose last NFL game was a 300+ yard passing performance in the playoffs:
Tom Brady in 2022 Wild Card Round
Philip Rivers in 2020 Wild Card Round
John Elway in Super Bowl XXXIII
Joe Montana in 1994 Wild Card Round
Tom Brady in 2022 Wild Card Round
Philip Rivers in 2020 Wild Card Round
John Elway in Super Bowl XXXIII
Joe Montana in 1994 Wild Card Round