David Byrne if he became a matchmaker: this is not my beautiful wife…but she could be yours!

I’ve been watching old episodes of Unsolved Mysteries and a guy who claimed to have been abducted by aliens was named Jack Weiner. I imagine the head alien talking to him telepathically like “We know much of your planet. We know your name is quite humorous“

Charlie Browns mom: Waaah wah wah wah waaah waaah waaah wah

Charlie Brown: oh, you mean pigpen

Charlie browns mom: Wah way. Waaaah wahwahwah wah wah waaah waaaah wahwhawah wah wah

Charlie Brown: yeah I get that. It’s pretty bad over there but I don’t think they hit him

David Byrne if he was a realtor: This is not my beautiful house….but it could be yours!