Author | Lightnews

Selena Maranjian

@selenamaranjian.bsky.social

900 followers 1.1K following 2.6K posts

Woman worrier, over-judger, catastrophist, cautiously optimistic, order Muppet. Love books, great TV, wooden jigsaw puzzles, and modern board games. Longtime (contract) writer for The Motley Fool. Sharing some humor to help us deal with stress. She/her.

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Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · Nov 14

Like #funny things, left-leaning #politics, #photography, #maps, #books, #boardgames, #TV, mammatus #clouds, #investing, #business, #nature, #art, #miscellany, #stocks, #quotes, Oxford commas, and #quirky stuff? Follow me. #FF (If you have like-minded followers, reshare? Thanks!)

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Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 7h

#help

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 15h

:) #kids #savings #retirement

Reposted by Selena Maranjian

Indivisible Oregon @indivisible-oregon.bsky.social · 7d

You attended No Kings? Take Action Today:
To Protect Our Democracy
Join Your local Indivisible Group
Make Calls with 5 Calls APP
Write Letters to voters with Vote Forward
Listen to weekly strategy calls
Stay Informed & Subscribe:
Letters from an American
Chop Wood Carry Water

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Reposted by Selena Maranjian

dharmalee3❌👑 @dharmalee3.bsky.social · 2d

Indivisible indivisible.org
VolunteerBlue volunteerblue.org/about-vb/
No Kings Alliance www.nokings.org/alliance
MoveOn front.moveon.org
Mobilize www.mobilize.us
Demcast demcast.com/team/
Working Families workingfamilies.org
5 Calls 5calls.org/all/
Call your Sens/Rep 202-224-3121

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Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 20h

Warren Buffett Thinks Investors Are "Playing With Fire" With a Sky-High Market Valuation. But He Can't Stop Buying These 3 Stocks.

#stockmarket #investing #stocks #buffett #warrenbuffett
www.fool.com/investing/20...

Warren Buffett Thinks Investors Are "Playing With Fire" With a Sky-High Market Valuation. But He Can't Stop Buying These 3 Stocks. | The Motley Fool

Berkshire Hathaway's still buying.

www.fool.com

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 21h

RT:

@tastefactory
HOUSE: I had dreams but no I'll just stay here & let u live in me, fine whatever
WIFE: Did u hear something
ME: It's just the house settling

@Crunk_Jews
I saw someone ask for a haircut at a bar once and I was so confused that I put down my blue drink with the combs in it.

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 21h

Clever posts of yore:

@MelvinofYork
"Grrraaains… grrraaains… I wanna eat your grrraaains” – vegan zombie

@Marlebean
It's like the only thing my kids learned from Snow White is that fruit is horribly poisonous.

#vegan #zombie #zombies

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 21h

Clever posts of yore:

@NightValeRadio
When a person dies and no one will miss them, the mourning is assigned to a random human. This is why you sometimes just feel sad.

@leahslounge
If someone from Ziplock could contact literally anybody in the cereal industry, that would be great.

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 21h

Clever posts of yore:

@SvnSxty
imagine a cereal so bad that two scoops of raisins made it better

@prchovanec
I want a US President who I can entirely forget about for days at a time.

@RodLacroix
Just practiced parallel parking with my teen. Six dead, dozens injured.

#driving #cereal #politics

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 2d

Clever posts of yore:

@melvinofyork
me: hey can you cancel-
printer: sorry, I'm busy
me: that's what I'm-
printer: I said I'm BUSY

@Welptheresthat
Printer: here’s all the shit you cancelled btw

#printer #modernlife

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 2d

Clever posts of yore:

@raisingteenstoday
Middle schoolers these days lug around 40-ounce Stanley cups like they're on a desert trek.
Meanwhile, we survived on a single sip from a germ-infested water fountain between classes and called it a day.

#water #hydrate

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 2d

Clever posts of yore:

@JewelStaite
I'm "this restaurant is too loud" years old.

@michaelcoren
I sympathize with those who fear that sex ed will sexualize kids. Our youngest studied WWI on a Monday; by Friday he'd invaded Belgium.

#SexEd #aging

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 3d

Clever posts of yore:

@Dr_Dmo
#welshsongs Wake Me Up Before You Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogo

@LizHackett
It's 4:17 PM in Los Angeles. A man wearing an infinity scarf holds up the convenience store line to ask which cigarettes are organic.

#organic #LA #welsh #wales

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 3d

Clever posts of yore:

@MaryJustice86
My husband is helping me relax by taking the kids to school this morning. We went over the drop off procedure 37 times &he just left without one of the kids.

@themacmind
If my attention span was any worse, I'd like a cup of coffee please

#marriage #kids #oops

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 3d

Clever posts of yore:

@sorrowscopes
Libra: The darkness that has haunted your past gives way to a new light. Which will make it easier for your enemies to find you.

@DanRather
Mask not what your country. can do for you. Mask is what you can do for your country.

#masks #horoscope #enemy

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 3d

Clever posts of yore:

@TheMichaelRock
Sorry I was late for work. I got trapped in an infinity scarf.

@sorrowscopes
Leo: Your crush finally talks to you this week but unfortunately, you still have an active curse from an old witch and can only make goat noises.

#oops #late #sorry #crush #witch

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Writing more letters to voters. Want to do the same?

(They provide addresses, templates, and guidance. Print, embellish, and send.)

votefwd.org #voting #GOTV #drivevoters #vote #election #dosomething #getinvolved

Vote Forward

Vote Forward volunteers send heartfelt handwritten letters to unregistered and low-propensity voters encouraging them to participate in our democracy. The letters have been shown to significantly boos...

votefwd.org

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Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

:) #books #reading #magic

“What an astonishing thing a book is. It's a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you're inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic.”
― Carl Sagan

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@simoncholland
Heard a rival dad is planning to hand out king size candy bars for Halloween so now every trick or treater that comes to my house is getting a full rack of ribs.

@Anonnamus
If you could watch my life backwards, you'd see a Jenny Craig success story

#halloween

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@FaisalAdam_
I got kicked out of the procrastinators club when I showed up for our first meeting.

@DemetriMartin
Time flies when you're having fun or surgery.

@donni
Being an adult is cool because sometimes your back hurts and other times a different part of your back hurts

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@AnnaDoesntWant2
I’m just saying, if a robot can perform surgery it can probably select the pictures with traffic lights

@WendyLiebman
CAPTCHA just asked me to put together a desk from IKEA.

#robot #robots #Captcha #IKEA

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@simoncholland
I should put a bowl of this Halloween candy in my office in case anyone wants some.
-Me, working from home. Alone.

@mommajessiec
One day you’re young and carefree and the next you’re like, “Wow, this is really good coleslaw.”

#WFH #aging #Halloween

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@JoshMalina
The first rule of Vote Club is “back the one who doesn’t like Hitler.”

@ZackBornstein
what’s most frustrating about Trump is that we’re wasting our last few good years before full climate collapse dealing with the dumbest Hitler of all time

#hitler #voting

Selena Maranjian @selenamaranjian.bsky.social · 4d

Clever posts of yore:

@greg16676935420
As a kid I thought quick sand would be a much bigger problem than its turned out to be

@mrjohndarby
I fall and drown in the lake. They pull out my body. "It's so bloated and grotesque" says one. "He only fell in a minute ago" says another

#childhood #oops