Allison
@rooflizard.bsky.social
talk is cheap and baby, time's expensive
Pinned
Allison
@rooflizard.bsky.social
· Jul 2
Today's photo on my parents' Instagram is just so good, like it is insane that my dad can do this
www.instagram.com/p/DLnFyC3ODZ...
www.instagram.com/p/DLnFyC3ODZ...
Franklin isn't even that popular anymore? This is such a specific and outdated reference, in addition to... all the other problems
(Also I have always disliked Franklin and I can't believe he's making me feel sympathetic to this whiny ass turtle)
(Also I have always disliked Franklin and I can't believe he's making me feel sympathetic to this whiny ass turtle)
Before you ask, yes apparently this is real. He must be taking comedy lessons and substances from Elon.
December 1, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Franklin isn't even that popular anymore? This is such a specific and outdated reference, in addition to... all the other problems
(Also I have always disliked Franklin and I can't believe he's making me feel sympathetic to this whiny ass turtle)
(Also I have always disliked Franklin and I can't believe he's making me feel sympathetic to this whiny ass turtle)
I named my fists Loretta and Lynn because I'll grab you by the hair of the head and I'll lift you off of the ground
I named my fists Chekhov and Gun because you know they're coming but you don't know when
i named my fists Rodgers and Hammerstein cuz theyre always in my own little corner
December 1, 2025 at 5:30 PM
I named my fists Loretta and Lynn because I'll grab you by the hair of the head and I'll lift you off of the ground
Tannenbaum con chili pepper lights🎄🌶️
December 1, 2025 at 4:49 AM
Tannenbaum con chili pepper lights🎄🌶️
In terms of excellent line delivery, the younger Agent Johnson going "I was in junior high, dickhead" in DIE HARD remains top tier
December 1, 2025 at 4:12 AM
In terms of excellent line delivery, the younger Agent Johnson going "I was in junior high, dickhead" in DIE HARD remains top tier
Reposted by Allison
The Benoit Blanc trilogy might end up as one of the best artistic statements on the diseased conservatism of our era, and l think Wake Up Dead Man is my favorite of the trilogy, largely because it’s Rian Johnson trying to understand Christianity and its adherents more than having a definitive take.
November 29, 2025 at 8:18 PM
The Benoit Blanc trilogy might end up as one of the best artistic statements on the diseased conservatism of our era, and l think Wake Up Dead Man is my favorite of the trilogy, largely because it’s Rian Johnson trying to understand Christianity and its adherents more than having a definitive take.
Saw the new Knives Out with @macyd.bsky.social this afternoon and I am in my FEELINGS about how good a mystery can be 😭
November 30, 2025 at 1:25 AM
Saw the new Knives Out with @macyd.bsky.social this afternoon and I am in my FEELINGS about how good a mystery can be 😭
I lived it: I accidentally texted something ABOUT someone TO them instead, and the earth declined to open up and swallow me so I just have to live with this embarrassment
November 29, 2025 at 5:44 PM
I lived it: I accidentally texted something ABOUT someone TO them instead, and the earth declined to open up and swallow me so I just have to live with this embarrassment
Reposted by Allison
Critics have claimed the recipe requires half a dozen eggs, while others have noted that only six eggs are required
How did the @nytimes.com editors let this sentence appear?
"Critics have likened Mr. Trump’s approach to extortion, while others have chalked it up as a cost of doing business with this administration."
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/26/u...
"Critics have likened Mr. Trump’s approach to extortion, while others have chalked it up as a cost of doing business with this administration."
www.nytimes.com/2025/11/26/u...
Northwestern University Nears Deal to Resolve Its Conflict With the White House
www.nytimes.com
November 29, 2025 at 2:58 PM
Critics have claimed the recipe requires half a dozen eggs, while others have noted that only six eggs are required
Reposted by Allison
I just became aware of this incredibly relatable drawing by John Singer Sargent.
November 29, 2025 at 2:31 AM
I just became aware of this incredibly relatable drawing by John Singer Sargent.
Hook 'em and all that
November 29, 2025 at 12:56 AM
Hook 'em and all that
Standing at the kitchen counter eating leftover stuffing, happy day after Thanksgiving to me
November 28, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Standing at the kitchen counter eating leftover stuffing, happy day after Thanksgiving to me
Reposted by Allison
Reposted by Allison
Reposted by Allison
Thread: Vintage Thanksgiving football programs
Texas-Texas A&M, 1958
Texas-Texas A&M, 1958
November 27, 2025 at 2:23 PM
Thread: Vintage Thanksgiving football programs
Texas-Texas A&M, 1958
Texas-Texas A&M, 1958
Reposted by Allison
Reposted by Allison
Tomatoes are a rich source of lycopene (werewolf dick)
July 8, 2023 at 2:08 AM
Tomatoes are a rich source of lycopene (werewolf dick)
Reposted by Allison
Handing back student work that’s been written by ChatGPT with a 0 followed by the comment “This essay will never stand in authentic wonder before the Beauty of God’s creation.”
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
Even God Is Worried About ChatGPT
Pope Leo XIV told students not to use artificial intelligence for homework, saying that AI ‘won’t stand in authentic wonder before the beauty of God’s creation.’
www.vulture.com
November 26, 2025 at 3:35 PM
Handing back student work that’s been written by ChatGPT with a 0 followed by the comment “This essay will never stand in authentic wonder before the Beauty of God’s creation.”
This morning's delight: a mom and son, maybe 8 years old, walking their dog past my house. Kid was wearing a suit and fedora at 8:30 in the morning (mom was wearing like, sweats, normal chilly morning dog walking gear)
November 26, 2025 at 3:52 PM
This morning's delight: a mom and son, maybe 8 years old, walking their dog past my house. Kid was wearing a suit and fedora at 8:30 in the morning (mom was wearing like, sweats, normal chilly morning dog walking gear)
As always, the greatest issue facing American women is that we aren't allowed to be hot
November 26, 2025 at 3:38 PM
As always, the greatest issue facing American women is that we aren't allowed to be hot
I have been asking for YEARS for the glasses we used at my granny's for holidays and my parents finally got them for me so we could use them Thursday... and then they left them in Dallas
My brother texted me this gif about it
My brother texted me this gif about it
November 26, 2025 at 1:45 AM
I have been asking for YEARS for the glasses we used at my granny's for holidays and my parents finally got them for me so we could use them Thursday... and then they left them in Dallas
My brother texted me this gif about it
My brother texted me this gif about it
Reposted by Allison
We need to bring back the 80s-90s thing where films start with the main character realizing they are late for work/school/curfew and bicycling/running through a scenic filming location while an easy-listening pop song plays and the intro credits flash by
November 25, 2025 at 10:06 PM
We need to bring back the 80s-90s thing where films start with the main character realizing they are late for work/school/curfew and bicycling/running through a scenic filming location while an easy-listening pop song plays and the intro credits flash by
Reposted by Allison
Everyone in the comments of that viral "We're not here to judge we're here to help" image with Dewey numbers for tough topics like abortion or HIV asking "Are those the prices?" are pushing all my "Could be a troll but what if they don't really know?" buttons. Here's one that looks less like AI slop
November 25, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Everyone in the comments of that viral "We're not here to judge we're here to help" image with Dewey numbers for tough topics like abortion or HIV asking "Are those the prices?" are pushing all my "Could be a troll but what if they don't really know?" buttons. Here's one that looks less like AI slop
Reposted by Allison
me: [reviewing very elaborate american girl doll trademark hypo with class]
student: professor, I’m sorry but you made an error & I feel obligated to let you know before we go further
me (nervous): I did? what was it?
student (gravely): you mixed up felicity & kirsten
student: professor, I’m sorry but you made an error & I feel obligated to let you know before we go further
me (nervous): I did? what was it?
student (gravely): you mixed up felicity & kirsten
November 26, 2025 at 12:41 AM
me: [reviewing very elaborate american girl doll trademark hypo with class]
student: professor, I’m sorry but you made an error & I feel obligated to let you know before we go further
me (nervous): I did? what was it?
student (gravely): you mixed up felicity & kirsten
student: professor, I’m sorry but you made an error & I feel obligated to let you know before we go further
me (nervous): I did? what was it?
student (gravely): you mixed up felicity & kirsten
I'm wearing one of my favorite dresses today, which is a gold/mustardy color and I am once again thanking Michelle Williams and Vera Wang for showing me the trick to blondes in yellow is a rich shade of yellow and red lipstick
November 25, 2025 at 7:58 PM
I'm wearing one of my favorite dresses today, which is a gold/mustardy color and I am once again thanking Michelle Williams and Vera Wang for showing me the trick to blondes in yellow is a rich shade of yellow and red lipstick