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tweeting quotes from @redvalleypod.bsky.social every 30 minutes | run by @petrichauri.bsky.social
CLIVE: Bit like Titanic this, isn't it? When Rose's mum is sat on the lifeboat watching everyone, well you know... Watching it all happen.
PAMELA: Watching the boat sink and all the poor people drown?
AWKWARD SILENCE.
CLIVE: Eleven Oscars. Good movie.
PAMELA: Watching the boat sink and all the poor people drown?
AWKWARD SILENCE.
CLIVE: Eleven Oscars. Good movie.
December 15, 2025 at 8:17 PM
CLIVE: Bit like Titanic this, isn't it? When Rose's mum is sat on the lifeboat watching everyone, well you know... Watching it all happen.
PAMELA: Watching the boat sink and all the poor people drown?
AWKWARD SILENCE.
CLIVE: Eleven Oscars. Good movie.
PAMELA: Watching the boat sink and all the poor people drown?
AWKWARD SILENCE.
CLIVE: Eleven Oscars. Good movie.
WARREN: Do you ignore everyone in the future or just me?
AUBREY: Are you okay to walk?
WARREN: I'll walk up Ballbag if you start answering me.
AUBREY: Are you okay to walk?
WARREN: I'll walk up Ballbag if you start answering me.
December 15, 2025 at 7:40 PM
WARREN: Do you ignore everyone in the future or just me?
AUBREY: Are you okay to walk?
WARREN: I'll walk up Ballbag if you start answering me.
AUBREY: Are you okay to walk?
WARREN: I'll walk up Ballbag if you start answering me.
GORDON: But that was it. No more contact. No response to any messages. I even called him. Nothing. Just like the job, Oscar had dropped me.
December 15, 2025 at 7:02 PM
GORDON: But that was it. No more contact. No response to any messages. I even called him. Nothing. Just like the job, Oscar had dropped me.
CLIVE: Let him go? Who's in charge here? This guy? This piss-drinking motherfucker?
December 15, 2025 at 6:26 PM
CLIVE: Let him go? Who's in charge here? This guy? This piss-drinking motherfucker?
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear?
WARREN: (CLOSE) I swear.
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear.
WARREN: (CLOSE) Could you take your hand off my knee?
WARREN: (CLOSE) I swear.
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear.
WARREN: (CLOSE) Could you take your hand off my knee?
December 15, 2025 at 5:46 PM
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear?
WARREN: (CLOSE) I swear.
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear.
WARREN: (CLOSE) Could you take your hand off my knee?
WARREN: (CLOSE) I swear.
GORDON: (CLOSE) You swear.
WARREN: (CLOSE) Could you take your hand off my knee?
BRYONY: There he is. There's Warren Godby. The only power he ever had. A wide eyed stare and that intimidating breathing. You don't frighten me Warren. You've never frightened anyone. Even the man you killed.
December 15, 2025 at 5:14 PM
BRYONY: There he is. There's Warren Godby. The only power he ever had. A wide eyed stare and that intimidating breathing. You don't frighten me Warren. You've never frightened anyone. Even the man you killed.
CLIVE: I wasn't kidding man, I'll stab you in the fucking eye with this fork. Now that's a really elaborate suicide but I reckon I can do it.
December 15, 2025 at 4:43 PM
CLIVE: I wasn't kidding man, I'll stab you in the fucking eye with this fork. Now that's a really elaborate suicide but I reckon I can do it.
CLIVE: Everyone's going on about frogs. I don't know. I slept the whole way here.
REBECCA: You didn't see the bridge? Giant frog statues. Like 10 feet tall statues of frogs.
REBECCA: You didn't see the bridge? Giant frog statues. Like 10 feet tall statues of frogs.
December 15, 2025 at 4:04 PM
CLIVE: Everyone's going on about frogs. I don't know. I slept the whole way here.
REBECCA: You didn't see the bridge? Giant frog statues. Like 10 feet tall statues of frogs.
REBECCA: You didn't see the bridge? Giant frog statues. Like 10 feet tall statues of frogs.
GORDON: Did you listen to it?
WARREN: Hello?
GORDON: Did you listen to the tape?
WARREN: Gordon.
GORDON: No, I'm the other guy you met yesterday who put his balls on the line sending recordings of highly sensitive material to your house.,
WARREN: Hello?
GORDON: Did you listen to the tape?
WARREN: Gordon.
GORDON: No, I'm the other guy you met yesterday who put his balls on the line sending recordings of highly sensitive material to your house.,
December 15, 2025 at 3:30 PM
GORDON: Did you listen to it?
WARREN: Hello?
GORDON: Did you listen to the tape?
WARREN: Gordon.
GORDON: No, I'm the other guy you met yesterday who put his balls on the line sending recordings of highly sensitive material to your house.,
WARREN: Hello?
GORDON: Did you listen to the tape?
WARREN: Gordon.
GORDON: No, I'm the other guy you met yesterday who put his balls on the line sending recordings of highly sensitive material to your house.,
CLIVE: Fuck sake. Where is Gordon bloody Porlock?
December 15, 2025 at 2:54 PM
CLIVE: Fuck sake. Where is Gordon bloody Porlock?
WARREN: It’s going to be very difficult for you to go serious on me because this level is called...?
GORDON: The Death Egg Zone.
WARREN: The fucking Death Egg! What were they thinking?!
GORDON: The Death Egg Zone.
WARREN: The fucking Death Egg! What were they thinking?!
December 15, 2025 at 2:17 PM
WARREN: It’s going to be very difficult for you to go serious on me because this level is called...?
GORDON: The Death Egg Zone.
WARREN: The fucking Death Egg! What were they thinking?!
GORDON: The Death Egg Zone.
WARREN: The fucking Death Egg! What were they thinking?!
AUBREY: You shouldn't blame yourself you know. Gordon was always going to end up here, one way or the other. You heard him on those tapes.
WARREN: Maybe. The day I met him, it changed things. You can't pretend otherwise. And that's on me.
WARREN: Maybe. The day I met him, it changed things. You can't pretend otherwise. And that's on me.
December 15, 2025 at 1:42 PM
AUBREY: You shouldn't blame yourself you know. Gordon was always going to end up here, one way or the other. You heard him on those tapes.
WARREN: Maybe. The day I met him, it changed things. You can't pretend otherwise. And that's on me.
WARREN: Maybe. The day I met him, it changed things. You can't pretend otherwise. And that's on me.
REBECCA: Mr Schill, I'm not sure you fully appreciate the gravity of the situation in which you find yourself. The scope of your failure is wider than you think.
CLIVE: Oh right. Do elaborate.
CLIVE: Oh right. Do elaborate.
December 15, 2025 at 1:10 PM
REBECCA: Mr Schill, I'm not sure you fully appreciate the gravity of the situation in which you find yourself. The scope of your failure is wider than you think.
CLIVE: Oh right. Do elaborate.
CLIVE: Oh right. Do elaborate.
WARREN: I mean. Yeah. When I met him, he was sat at his desk in Archives, and... yeah. Fine. He was, wasn't he? He was just like that, I thought he was a nutjob. But tha… that's when I was... I wasn't really me, not really... Oh, Christ this is all so fucked up.
December 15, 2025 at 12:37 PM
WARREN: I mean. Yeah. When I met him, he was sat at his desk in Archives, and... yeah. Fine. He was, wasn't he? He was just like that, I thought he was a nutjob. But tha… that's when I was... I wasn't really me, not really... Oh, Christ this is all so fucked up.
CLIVE: Alright sugartits.
December 15, 2025 at 12:01 PM
CLIVE: Alright sugartits.
CLIVE: I do my best with what I have Bryony, but the ratio of time versus volume of cunts I'm surrounded by means I'm reluctantly forced to return to the well every now and then. We've got a little time now though, I'll see what I can cook up between here and Glasgow.
December 15, 2025 at 11:28 AM
CLIVE: I do my best with what I have Bryony, but the ratio of time versus volume of cunts I'm surrounded by means I'm reluctantly forced to return to the well every now and then. We've got a little time now though, I'll see what I can cook up between here and Glasgow.
CLIVE: Alright sugartits.
December 15, 2025 at 10:57 AM
CLIVE: Alright sugartits.
GORDON: (CLOSE) Look Warren. If they're sending the butter-wouldn't-melt 'uh, um, uh' new boy looking for Red Valley, it'll be for a reason. Not a happy touchy-feely smiley reason, a creepy, suspicious, nasty one. Trust me.
December 15, 2025 at 10:19 AM
GORDON: (CLOSE) Look Warren. If they're sending the butter-wouldn't-melt 'uh, um, uh' new boy looking for Red Valley, it'll be for a reason. Not a happy touchy-feely smiley reason, a creepy, suspicious, nasty one. Trust me.
PAMELA: Clive.
CLIVE: Pam.
PAMELA: Would you like me to call my scuzzy little mates?
CLIVE: Yes, please.
CLIVE: Pam.
PAMELA: Would you like me to call my scuzzy little mates?
CLIVE: Yes, please.
December 15, 2025 at 10:19 AM
PAMELA: Clive.
CLIVE: Pam.
PAMELA: Would you like me to call my scuzzy little mates?
CLIVE: Yes, please.
CLIVE: Pam.
PAMELA: Would you like me to call my scuzzy little mates?
CLIVE: Yes, please.
GORDON: He was eaten by pigs?
WARREN: Yeah, but very, very muscular pigs.
GORDON: Pigs eat people anyway, don't they?
WARREN: Do they?
GORDON: I'm just saying it's not quite the wild sci-fi death you're making it out to be.
WARREN: Yeah, but very, very muscular pigs.
GORDON: Pigs eat people anyway, don't they?
WARREN: Do they?
GORDON: I'm just saying it's not quite the wild sci-fi death you're making it out to be.
December 15, 2025 at 10:19 AM
GORDON: He was eaten by pigs?
WARREN: Yeah, but very, very muscular pigs.
GORDON: Pigs eat people anyway, don't they?
WARREN: Do they?
GORDON: I'm just saying it's not quite the wild sci-fi death you're making it out to be.
WARREN: Yeah, but very, very muscular pigs.
GORDON: Pigs eat people anyway, don't they?
WARREN: Do they?
GORDON: I'm just saying it's not quite the wild sci-fi death you're making it out to be.
GORDON: I'm an archivist, Mrs. Godby. It's just a habit.
December 15, 2025 at 9:28 AM
GORDON: I'm an archivist, Mrs. Godby. It's just a habit.
AUBREY: Hester. Please. I've been awake for 10 minutes.
HESTER: Yes sir. Sorry sir.
HESTER: Yes sir. Sorry sir.
December 15, 2025 at 8:51 AM
AUBREY: Hester. Please. I've been awake for 10 minutes.
HESTER: Yes sir. Sorry sir.
HESTER: Yes sir. Sorry sir.
WARREN: They wanted to know how I felt. After the freaking out and the headbutting, way back when. When I was laid up in the bed and you were there. I felt relief. Do you think that's weird?
December 15, 2025 at 8:17 AM
WARREN: They wanted to know how I felt. After the freaking out and the headbutting, way back when. When I was laid up in the bed and you were there. I felt relief. Do you think that's weird?
FRANCESCA: You're going to live or die on the Aloha Eternity, Clive.
CLIVE: In many ways that is kind of the point.
CLIVE: In many ways that is kind of the point.
December 15, 2025 at 7:44 AM
FRANCESCA: You're going to live or die on the Aloha Eternity, Clive.
CLIVE: In many ways that is kind of the point.
CLIVE: In many ways that is kind of the point.
AUBREY: Hey, Blue Sky. How to break a car window from the inside.
December 15, 2025 at 7:44 AM
AUBREY: Hey, Blue Sky. How to break a car window from the inside.