Author | Lightnews

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 1d

The closest thing I have in my life to Rick's Cafe' American is the dog park.

#dogpark

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 1d

Marriage is allowing someone to pick something off you until you bleed.

#Marriage

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 2d

Guy Fieri is the Larry Flynt of Food Porn.

#Food #FoodPorn #GuyFieri #Mmm

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 2d

I shot the interview of Estelle Brown in this movie!

#Tribeca #Documentary

tribecafilm.com/films/i-was-...

I Was Born This Way | 2025 Tribeca Festival | Tribeca

In 1977, Archbishop Carl Bean made history by recording his disco hit “I Was Born this Way,” celebrated as the world’s first gay anthem, and setting the stage for a revolution in queer music. All-star...

tribecafilm.com

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 3d

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 4d

Proud of you, Tommy.

#Bedding

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 5d

There are basically only two grades of #Sushi :

Excellent and Food Poisoning.

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 5d

I hate the idea of cosmetic surgery but then I feel like a hypocrite when I remember that I had a little work done when I was three days old.

#PlasticSurgery #CosmeticSurgery #Snip #Ouch #Cut #YouDontHaveToBeJewish #covenant #OyVey

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 6d

Put my garbage out last night and today it’s gone.

The #rapture is REAL, people!

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 8d

Got #Ghosted by someone I haven’t thought about in five years.

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 8d

How was your hotel?

Ummmm….convienent?

#Hotel #SetLife #Hustler #WaffleHouse #Sketchy

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 8d

I’m worried that if I get generic #Viagra that I’ll have a generic erection.

#Insecurity #ModernLove #FatGuyGoesNutzoid

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 8d

I come across two guys in a parking lot. One of them hands me a gun and says: “Hey, can you settle an argument?”

#choices #GunViolence #Trivia #Marscapone #AlCapone

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 8d

I don’t want to 2nd guess Mel Gibson but “The Resurrection of the Christ”?

Ummmm…….Spoiler Alert Right there in the title.

#MelGibson #Spoiler #Resurrection

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 9d

You think when god made dogs he knew that they'd shit on the carpet?

#Philosophy #BigQuestions #Dogs #Pets #Shit #athiest #ButIWannaKnow

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Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 11d

If I never see the “Wally Wick” version of #Ghostbusters again it’ll be too soon.

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 11d

When I say I was hanging out in women’s underwear I mean I was shopping with my wife.

#MallLife #Shopping

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 11d

I know I’m kind of late but I’m really getting into things that happened twenty years ago.

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 12d

Random flex at the park:
Ole Man: who is Vanderbilt playing today?
Me: What?
Ole Man: Who is Vanderbilt playing?
Me: Uh….I don’t know.
Ole Man: I’m asking because I went to Vanderbilt.

#Flex #Vanderbilt #Football I guess
#IDontKnowAndIDontCare

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 12d

White hot hatred for people who try to find meaning and logic in tongue twisters.

#Assholes #Tonguetwisters

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 12d

I have no respect for people who never go to little hole in the wall Asian restaurants.

#ThaiFood #LaotianFood

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 12d

Me, naked on the Subway:
“What’s the matter, baby? Scared of needles?”

#Classy #fomo #SDE #NowThatsWhatICallMusic #Wrong

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 12d

Roy Cohn energy

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Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 13d

Are we still doing Morbin’ Time? Is that still a thing?

Paul “the amazing” Armstrong @paul24fps.bsky.social · 14d

Cicada emerging in October: “All right! let’s go! Fuckfest 2025! Mating strategy: this guy, your ass! I’ve been waiting 17 years for this!…..Hey, where is everybody?”

#Nature #Life #Cicada #Tardy #FarSide #Insects