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Normal Island News
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An asteroid impact on Davos could solve an awful lot of the world's problems right about now x
January 20, 2026 at 8:20 PM
BREAKING: Israel has bulldozed the UNRWA HQ in Jerusalem after uncovering undeniable evidence that it was providing humanitarian assistance to Palestinians x
January 20, 2026 at 4:59 PM
BREAKING: The mainstream media has remembered how to use the word genocide x
January 19, 2026 at 6:14 PM
THAT'S IT, I QUIT! REALITY HAS FINALLY DEFEATED ME! HOW THE FUCK DO I SATIRISE THIS? HOW??? 😭😭😭
January 19, 2026 at 1:12 PM
BREAKING: Huge diplomatic row as Reza Pahlavi and Maria Machado argue over who should be declared rightful leader of Greenland 👀
January 19, 2026 at 11:23 AM
Who else is fucking thrilled that Palantir, the mass surveillance company that brags of killing its enemies, is getting our NHS records and there is nothing we can do about it? x
January 18, 2026 at 5:14 PM
BREAKING: Trump is now reluctant to use miliary force against Greenland. He will instead pressure Denmark and Greenland into submission, which is the same approach he used to acquire each of his wives x
January 18, 2026 at 11:59 AM
BREAKING: Israel is trying to shut down 20 Doctors Without Borders clinics in Gaza after receiving intelligence that they have been infiltrated by doctors 😳
January 18, 2026 at 10:38 AM
BREAKING: Iran has expressed concern over the human rights situation in Minneapolis and urged ICE to not harm protesters x
January 18, 2026 at 9:55 AM
Reposted by Normal Island News
Tony Blair appointed to Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable
www.normalisland.co.uk/publish/post...
Tony Blair appointed to Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable
Sir Tony Blair has been appointed to the Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable and Genghis Khan said "no" because it might harm his reputation.
www.normalisland.co.uk
January 17, 2026 at 8:20 PM
Tony Blair appointed to Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable
www.normalisland.co.uk/publish/post...
Tony Blair appointed to Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable
Sir Tony Blair has been appointed to the Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable and Genghis Khan said "no" because it might harm his reputation.
www.normalisland.co.uk
January 17, 2026 at 8:20 PM
BREAKING: Tony Blair has been appointed to the Gaza Board of Peace after Satan was unavailable and Genghis Khan said "no" because he thought it might be harmful to his reputation x
January 17, 2026 at 4:40 PM
My grandfather in Iran before the 1979 revolution 😭
January 17, 2026 at 12:02 PM
BREAKING: If you're an American who doesn't have healthcare, you will be delighted to hear your government has just pledged an extra $3.3 billion... to Israel x
January 17, 2026 at 11:56 AM
BREAKING: Turns out the quickest way to become a millionaire in the US is to murder someone and start a GoFundMe x

metro.co.uk/2026/01/16/i...
ICE agent who shot dead Renee Good is now a millionaire through online fundraise
metro.co.uk
January 16, 2026 at 4:45 PM
This is huge! I’ve just received the Pulitzer Prize for journalism! Okay, technically I wasn’t awarded it, but I kept bullying the actual winner until they handed it over, and Trump tells me this counts! I’m so proud of me!
January 16, 2026 at 2:25 PM
BREAKING: The greatest ever winner of the FIFA Peace Prize has now been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize after carrying out just 622 bombings in the past year x
January 16, 2026 at 10:12 AM
January 15, 2026 at 10:41 PM
BREAKING: Man who raped girls on Epstein island says he is keen to liberate the women of Iran ♥️
January 15, 2026 at 4:33 PM
Hugely exciting moment in Iran as women tear off their hijabs and head into the streets, waiting to be liberated by American bombs. "Hopefully, Iran can become the next Gaza!" they cry, clutching pictures of Donald Trump against their chests.
January 14, 2026 at 10:24 PM