Jez
@misterjez.com
Owner of one cat, one horse and a design and marketing agency in Tunbridge Wells. Not bad with a camera - http://unsplash.com/@jeztimms
Nice of DPD to leave a lens worth a few thousand outside someone else’s front door instead of mine. Thankfully I’ve got great neighbours who just brought it round.
Not a single notification from DPD. Utterly useless.
Not a single notification from DPD. Utterly useless.
February 5, 2026 at 9:25 PM
Nice of DPD to leave a lens worth a few thousand outside someone else’s front door instead of mine. Thankfully I’ve got great neighbours who just brought it round.
Not a single notification from DPD. Utterly useless.
Not a single notification from DPD. Utterly useless.
I want to be a Dormeo Sleep Expert.
February 5, 2026 at 8:20 AM
I want to be a Dormeo Sleep Expert.
We Bury The Dead. Great film, great twist on the zombie genre.
February 5, 2026 at 12:57 AM
We Bury The Dead. Great film, great twist on the zombie genre.
Another week of heavy rain from tomorrow. It's basically roads becoming actual rivers in places around here as it is :(
February 4, 2026 at 7:02 AM
Another week of heavy rain from tomorrow. It's basically roads becoming actual rivers in places around here as it is :(
Wonder if Andy and Mandy know a little too much and go the way Epstein did.
February 3, 2026 at 11:18 PM
Wonder if Andy and Mandy know a little too much and go the way Epstein did.
My mum’s elder brother was a nonce. Raped her with some of his mates before her teens. She told me the day after my nans funeral.
Best and most satisfying one punch knockout I’ve ever done. Cunt.
Best and most satisfying one punch knockout I’ve ever done. Cunt.
February 3, 2026 at 7:13 PM
My mum’s elder brother was a nonce. Raped her with some of his mates before her teens. She told me the day after my nans funeral.
Best and most satisfying one punch knockout I’ve ever done. Cunt.
Best and most satisfying one punch knockout I’ve ever done. Cunt.
The roads are so bad to the stables now, with flooding and literal craters, not potholes, I am going to bin the Land Rover for a motocross bike instead.
February 3, 2026 at 4:33 PM
The roads are so bad to the stables now, with flooding and literal craters, not potholes, I am going to bin the Land Rover for a motocross bike instead.
Why do you keep reaching for my hand?
Do you see something I can't?
Why do you try to save me?
This fate is well deserved
I only make things worse
Why do you try to save me?
Do you see something I can't?
Why do you try to save me?
This fate is well deserved
I only make things worse
Why do you try to save me?
February 2, 2026 at 10:44 PM
Why do you keep reaching for my hand?
Do you see something I can't?
Why do you try to save me?
This fate is well deserved
I only make things worse
Why do you try to save me?
Do you see something I can't?
Why do you try to save me?
This fate is well deserved
I only make things worse
Why do you try to save me?
"A 24-year-old man came to a hospital in Toulouse this weekend, complaining about pain but offering no details.
After entering surgery, it was discovered that he had pushed a 16x4cm World War One shell dating back to 1918 in his rectum.
Doctors called the bomb squad, police and firefighters."
After entering surgery, it was discovered that he had pushed a 16x4cm World War One shell dating back to 1918 in his rectum.
Doctors called the bomb squad, police and firefighters."
February 2, 2026 at 12:18 PM
"A 24-year-old man came to a hospital in Toulouse this weekend, complaining about pain but offering no details.
After entering surgery, it was discovered that he had pushed a 16x4cm World War One shell dating back to 1918 in his rectum.
Doctors called the bomb squad, police and firefighters."
After entering surgery, it was discovered that he had pushed a 16x4cm World War One shell dating back to 1918 in his rectum.
Doctors called the bomb squad, police and firefighters."
In this current fucking strange world we live in, I somehow expect Mandelson to be announced by Farage tomorrow as their next piece of rubbish to join his party.
February 1, 2026 at 10:58 PM
In this current fucking strange world we live in, I somehow expect Mandelson to be announced by Farage tomorrow as their next piece of rubbish to join his party.
Just woke up. Has anyone invaded somewhere yet?
January 31, 2026 at 9:59 PM
Just woke up. Has anyone invaded somewhere yet?
Today was a bad day of being a polymath. Upset two people because I come up with answers that take them much longer, they think I am trying to belittle them. I am not, I just see the 'problem' from many angles, and arrive at a solution faster. This leads to snipes and 'looks'.
January 30, 2026 at 8:43 PM
Today was a bad day of being a polymath. Upset two people because I come up with answers that take them much longer, they think I am trying to belittle them. I am not, I just see the 'problem' from many angles, and arrive at a solution faster. This leads to snipes and 'looks'.
Just went to see Melania at the cinema.
Well, I didn't actually watch it, it was just to be alone and have a little snooze.
Well, I didn't actually watch it, it was just to be alone and have a little snooze.
January 30, 2026 at 3:33 PM
Just went to see Melania at the cinema.
Well, I didn't actually watch it, it was just to be alone and have a little snooze.
Well, I didn't actually watch it, it was just to be alone and have a little snooze.
"UK citizens to be able to travel to China visa-free, Starmer announces in Beijing"
Whoopdi-doo. I'd rather be able to live and work in Europe, visa free, just like in those olden days, before grifters fucked it up for us all.
Whoopdi-doo. I'd rather be able to live and work in Europe, visa free, just like in those olden days, before grifters fucked it up for us all.
January 29, 2026 at 1:39 PM
"UK citizens to be able to travel to China visa-free, Starmer announces in Beijing"
Whoopdi-doo. I'd rather be able to live and work in Europe, visa free, just like in those olden days, before grifters fucked it up for us all.
Whoopdi-doo. I'd rather be able to live and work in Europe, visa free, just like in those olden days, before grifters fucked it up for us all.
New Noah Kahan album out in April :)
Saved my sanity more than once.
Saved my sanity more than once.
January 28, 2026 at 7:49 PM
New Noah Kahan album out in April :)
Saved my sanity more than once.
Saved my sanity more than once.
I hope you don't mind, but Mum wants to join us.
Something you can say during sex and at the Melania movie.
January 28, 2026 at 3:19 PM
I hope you don't mind, but Mum wants to join us.
Bloody pond has flooded, cutting the path off from my boys. Should be fun later trying to get them in :)
January 27, 2026 at 11:19 AM
Bloody pond has flooded, cutting the path off from my boys. Should be fun later trying to get them in :)
The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.
January 26, 2026 at 8:15 PM
The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.
What the fuck is going on?
January 26, 2026 at 1:11 PM
What the fuck is going on?
Just CBA today. World’s fucked.
January 26, 2026 at 9:34 AM
Just CBA today. World’s fucked.