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Lothar Hex

Lothar Hex

@lotharhex.bsky.social

250 followers 220 following 1.9K posts

Misanthropic. He/Him. I love dark humour, robots, & over-analysing cartoons. Married to @rayematthews.bsky.social, Eat the rich. ⬛️⬜️🟪🟫 Lothar Hex on twitter.

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Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 10h

*Genericon

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 10h

I herby declare this week Gericon week! Celebrating all the army builders. First Up Brunt and Centurion Droid, who I have christened "Grunt."

I love a good generic boy and this mould ticks all my boxes.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 1d

According to @rayematthews.bsky.social I was RAPPING in my sleep last night.

My street name is REMinem.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 2d

"I've found you, faker!"

"Sir, this is a Wendy's."

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 2d

So I can't be the only one who thought of this when they got their Flatline in hand right?

Motherfucker looks like they would play "I Am All of Me" during surgery. On loop.

Which they should. It's a banger.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 2d

No that was just all the sperm in the soda.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 2d

"We at McVitie's think the new 'soylent green coated cocoa bricks' will deliver the same great taste, while also solving our over-staffing crisis."

iucounu @iucounu.bsky.social · 2d

Omg

"We made some changes to McVitie's Penguin and Club earlier this year, where we are using a chocolate flavour coating with cocoa mass, rather than a chocolate coating. Sensory testing with consumers shows the new coatings deliver the same great taste as the originals," the McVitie's owner, Pladis, said in a statement.
Club's classic advertising slogan citing its chocolate content is no longer in use, replaced by: "If you like a lot of biscuit in your break, join our Club."

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 2d

This is the time, my comrades.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 3d

That what I said. "OH WHAT A MOTHERFUCKING PAINFULL EXPERIENCE THIS WAS!"

Except replace all that with suppressed screams and mild sobbing.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 3d

No. Ice gel on a hemorrhoid.

"Cos cold compresses help and this is just that in gel form, right."

I swear my epitath will read "He died as he lived. Like a fucking moron."

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 3d

Phrase that has been said before every failed home medical treatment:

"I'm sure this will work fine."

Phrase said by me 30 mins ago:

"OH GOD THIS WAS A BAD IDEA OOOOOOW."

I'm an idiot and my butt is sore.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 4d

After:

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 4d

Since it was the only figure I'm likely to get of this design for a while I decided to do a ten minute make over with gundam marker some stonewall grey vallejo game paint, and dry brushing. Oh and breaking another of the smaller spines for symmetry. Anyway.

Before:

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 4d

Got a Godzilla - 1 fig that turned out to be a bootleg. Obvious cos of the price but I was ignorant to how much SHMA figures can be. The main clue was that it id completly charcoal black bad eye paint & one of the smaller dorsal spines was missing. Like broken off before it was in the box.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 4d

New bots.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 4d

Starting as they mean to go on.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 7d

Glad you enjoyed the WH40K x Sonic project that went way too far.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 7d

THE ROYAL RECEEDING HAIRLINE! VEGETA IS INFECTED WITH THE BALD LOSING GENE BUT HIS PROUD SAIYAN LOCKS WILL NOT YIELD WITHOUT A FIGHT.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. As presented by the "Jesus Christ Lothar Shut The Fuck Up" Foundation.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 7d

So Vegeta right? Prince of all Saiyans, prod warrior, Bulma's bottom and perennial 2nd placer in life. So he also grows hair like Goku, often does quite well against the bald villain/antagonist. But usually comes up short (heh). Why though?

I'LL TELL YOU WHY!

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 7d

Grief brain is weird cos it makes me think about this shit.

So 19 years and change ago I wrote this comic for Exterminatus Now. I still find it amusing and mostly true to this day, despite what @herculepyro.bsky.social thinks of reference jokes. BUT NOT I HAVE A CORROBARATING THEORY.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 7d

Mother fucker if you need an avatar you fucking crop that shit in MS Paint like the rest of us.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 8d

"The client called back."

🏰meg⚔️ @Birthright Audiobook! @impavid.us · 11d

In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

I'll go first: Six page commercial lease.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 8d

I thought he'd be one of those guys that was like, doing normal stuff every day and then just one day STOPPED. Which is stupid. But yeah, we always keep hold of people at their best in our memories.

Gonna miss you Grandad, give Nana a hug from me when you see her.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 8d

She's been making food for my mum, taking care of things round the house. I'm going to be getting back to doing shit today but yeah, gonna be rough for a while.

Grandad was a week and change from being 92. And only really declined super heavily in the last 12 months.

Lothar Hex @lotharhex.bsky.social · 8d

So, my grandfather passed away 2 days ago after a few months of declining health. Didn't put it anywhere public because my sister was on holiday and my mum wanted to wait until she was back before telling her as she only had one day left.

@rayematthews.bsky.social has been my rock during this.